(HunHan) Pretty little Lies like stars in the sky (part 5)
part 4
“My memory....” Sehun mumbles. He is sprawled on the bed, staring up at the ceiling. Luhan has not yet come back, but he’s not sure he’s ready to see the archangel. He needs time to think.
Kris, too, had talked about consequences before. When they first spoke to the demon lord, he’d mentioned it more than once. Why hadn’t Sehun thought more of it? Had he been the only one who hadn’t known?
But like Kai said, they had done a good job of keeping it from him. Zitao had told Kris not to talk about it. Luhan had started to breach the subject once or twice, but had ended up stopping before giving anything away.
If Yixing hadn’t hinted about it to Sehun, would the human still have been completely clueless right now?
How long had they planned to keep the knowledge from him? He’d have had to find out at some point. Or had they planned not to tell him? Let him return to the human realm to unwittingly forget the existence of his lover?
And what would become of Luhan? Even if he accompanied Sehun to the human realm... For the archangel, he’d have to live with the fact that Sehun would not remember him. That... would be even worse than forgetting.
The human understands now, why Luhan had been so terribly needy and clingy over the last few days. Why the archangel had tried so hard to show Sehun just how much he loved him.
Was this really their fate? To be forced into separation because they tried to stay together?
“Too many questions....” Sehun says offhandedly, blinking away the tears that threaten his eyes.
Only two days left...
“Sehunnie!” Luhan’s cheerful voice wafts in from the door, and Sehun lifts his head to see the archangel enter with food in hand, a smile brightening his face. Sehun loves that smile a little too much. What will it be like, he wonders, to forget it? “How are you feeling this morning? Did you sleep all right?”
“Yeah, I guess...” the human mutters. He doesn’t say anything about Kai’s visit.
He’s not particularly hungry, but he doesn’t protest as Luhan insists on feeding him, affectionately placing small amounts of food in his mouth and watching him chew and swallow. There’s an unspoken urgency in Luhan’s actions, something Sehun wouldn’t have seen before if he’d still been ignorant of the situation, but is now glaringly obvious, so much so that it makes Sehun want to cry.
“I was thinking we could go out today and see everyone. We’ll be getting ready to leave early tomorrow, so...” Luhan explains, voice faltering a bit as he helps himself to some of the food, as well. It breaks the human’s heart, how much Luhan is obviously hurting. Why didn’t he see it before?
“Sounds good,” Sehun simply responds.
He doesn’t have the heart to tell Luhan that he knows. Not yet.
The atmosphere is thick and somber when they head out of the castle. Sehun pretends this is how it’s always been, but he gets the feeling that somehow the underworld is mourning for him and Luhan.
They find Baekhyun and Chanyeol at the lake and exchange a few words. It’s a brief meeting, during which Chanyeol grins widely the whole time and Baekhyun keeps shooting Luhan nervous looks, as if expecting the archangel to break down at any second.
Baekhyun pulls Luhan aside when they go to leave, whispering something quietly in his ear. Sehun knows he shouldn’t eavesdrop, but he can’t help listening in.
“Hang in there,” the song angel says. “You’ll figure something out. Me and Yeol did, despite the odds. I have faith that no matter what happens, you and Sehun will be together. You’re meant for each other.” Luhan gives him a short nod, unable to voice his thanks for the encouragement, but the look in his eyes says everything.
There are a few other archangels that Luhan visits, ones Sehun doesn’t know, the female archangel from the opening feast and a few of her friends, as well as a small group of higher demons they find at one of the pubs in the fire district.
Then they retreat back to the castle where Luhan leads the way through the upper and lower levels, stopping to say goodbye to a handful of the demons they meet. Suho tearfully pulls Luhan in for a hug, and Chen apologizes once more for his hostility towards Sehun. Xiumin cries again. Kyungsoo thanks them for keeping him company, and Kai is nowhere to be found.
It reminds Sehun of a scene straight out of a movie, as if this isn’t really happening. Like it’s all a bad dream and he’ll wake up and everything will be normal. But if he’s being honest, he doesn’t even remember what normal is.
When they finally return to their room, Luhan looks more fragile than Sehun has ever seen him. He’s afraid even the slightest touch will cause the archangel to shatter and break into a thousand tiny pieces that Sehun will never be able to put back together.
It really hurts. Especially when Luhan still hasn’t said anything to Sehun; nothing about the consequences, nothing about how much this is tearing him up inside.
Is it too late already? Is there nothing Sehun can do?
“Sehun, I...” Luhan’s voice is brittle with emotion. “There’s... something you should know.”
Finally, Sehun thinks.
“It’s OK, Lu,” he whispers, cupping the elder male’s face in his hands. “I know already. I know that being sent back to the human realm will erase my memory.” Luhan’s eyes widen, his lips parting in confusion.
“But how-?” he begins to ask, trembling in Sehun’s grasp.
“I told him,” interrupts a voice. The two break apart as Kai’s face takes shape in the wall next to them. “I’m sorry. It was an accident. Old habits die hard, I guess.”
Luhan looks at the Lie with a soft, understanding gaze. “He would have found out anyway,” the archangel murmurs, taking Sehun’s hand in his own. “I’m sorry as well, Sehun. I should have told you at the very beginning when you first got here.” He closes his eyes, burying his face against Sehun’s neck. “I just couldn’t bear to have you suffer the whole time you were here.”
“It’s OK,” Sehun repeats, raising one hand to tangle fingers in Luhan’s hair. It’s not OK, he knows. They both know, but there’s nothing they can do.
“So what will you do, then?” Kai asks. “Sehun will forget, but Luhan will remember. Are you fine with that?” Luhan’s head shifts as he shakes it, lifting his gaze from Sehun’s skin.
“I was thinking... of asking the Lord to turn me into a human,” the archangel replies hesitantly, cringing as Kai chokes and coughs and sputters, looking at him incredulously.
“Can he do that?” Sehun inquires, looking into Luhan’s eyes with curiosity. “And what would that change?”
“I’ve heard about it,” Kai says before Luhan can respond, having regained his composure, “But I’m not sure it would do you any good. It just means that Luhan would forget as well.”
“It may seem like a weak decision,” the archangel frowns, biting his lower lip. “But I... I want to be able... to live in that world. Not just exist in it as I am now. I don’t belong there as an archangel, and I never will. If I can be human...” Luhan gently presses his lips to the corner of Sehun’s mouth, smiling briefly. “... Well, I don’t really know, but I get the feeling that it will help, somehow.”
Sehun’s not sure why, but he agrees with Luhan.
They spend the last night slowly, passionately making love. It’s corny, but Sehun can’t help wanting to cherish these last intimate moments. Despite that he knows what’s going to happen, he’s come to terms with it and intends to love Luhan as deeply as possible before he is forced to forget.
He won’t let himself regret anything.
Luhan’s small figure wrapped tightly in his arms; his lips exploring every inch of Luhan’s face, body; lips meeting lips until they are swollen and wet. Soft noises of pleasure, whispers of sweet nothings and a love that will span all the realms; an unrivaled love acknowledged by all those who witness its intensity.
They don’t need anything special. Being together, if only for this one last night, will surely be enough. Perhaps they won’t ever truly forget. But only time will tell.
It is the earliest Sehun has had to wake up while staying in the underworld. He is awoken by Luhan’s lips and Luhan’s voice ringing in his ears. “It’s time, my Love,” the archangel says.
Sehun sleepily opens his eyes, taking in the sight of the perfect being hovering over him. He wants to hold onto Luhan and never let go, devour the archangel with his eyes and ravage him with kisses until he wishes he could breathe. There is nothing he can do to fully express the strong adoration he feels, and yet the look in Luhan’s eyes tells him that he does not need to do anything; that Luhan already understands.
“It’ll be all right,” Luhan murmurs, smiling gently as he places one more kiss to Sehun’s lips. “No Lie can convince me otherwise.” Sehun can’t help smiling as well, allowing the elder male to help him out of bed.
This time, instead of dressing in archangel attire, both leave their room in casual human clothes. The previous night, Kai had brought Luhan a pair of jeans and a t-shirt once he’d comprehended Luhan’s decision to become human.
“Good luck,” the Lie had told them.
“Kris, Yixing, and Lord Zitao should already be waiting at the gate,” Luhan explains as they make their way out of the castle. “It will all be over quickly, I think.” He reaches out and intertwines his fingers with Sehun’s, giving the human’s hand a tight squeeze. Stay strong, is his silent message, and Sehun nods, squeezing back.
They walk in silence. The underworld is particularly quiet at this time of morning, all of its inhabitants in their own district, sleeping off the food and drink consumed during the celebration. Sehun likes the lack of noise, but it also makes him feel more anxious than he would have been if other archangels had been around to see them leave.
Eventually, Sehun recognizes the doorway he and Kris had first come through to enter the underworld, and beyond it is the stairway they’d climbed. It’s different to descend this way, Luhan by his side, hand clasped in his own.
At the bottom of the stairway, he sees Kris and Zitao, as well as Yixing in his unicorn form. Kris looks almost as anxious as Sehun feels, incessantly pacing back and forth until he notices the two approaching.
“Ah, here they are,” Zitao says pleasantly. Sehun expected him to be too ready to do this.
“Sehun, how are you feeling? Luhan, you told him what’s going to happen, didn’t you? And are you still set on becoming a human? Are both of you prepared? Have you-” Kris begins a string of questions, stopping as Yixing interrupts him with a tinkling, smooth laugh.
“Enough, Kris,” the healer says, stepping forward and gently placing the tip of his horn in the space between Luhan and Sehun’s entwined hands. Warmth promptly engulfs Sehun’s body, calming his nerves just a bit. “You’ll overwhelm them.”
“They’ll be overwhelmed regardless,” Zitao says, one brow cocked haphazardly.
“At least try to have some sympathy for them, my Lord,” Yixing sighs, giving him a look. “You’re not the one who’s about to lose your memory.” Sehun’s throat tightens and his heart skips a beat.
“I know,” Zitao shrugs apologetically.
“But isn’t there anything else we can do?” Kris asks, a hint of desperation in his tone.
“We’ve already gone over this, love,” Zitao frowns, clicking his tongue against the back of his pointed teeth. “This is one thing I have no control over. I wish it were different, believe me I do, but I simply can’t change what happens once they’re sent to the human realm. I don’t have that kind of power.”
“I know,” Kris echoes, looking down.
“It’s OK,” Luhan says softly, lifting his free hand to rest it on Kris’ shoulder. “Don’t worry, Kris. We’ll be fine.” The flame archangel dips his head, gaze focused on ground.
“So are you two ready?” Zitao addresses Sehun and Luhan, stretching his arms in front of him and cracking his knuckles. “We have to get started soon, before any of the other archangels wake up. I can’t have any accidents, you hear?”
Sehun looks at Luhan. There is fear in the archangel’s eyes, and his grasp on Sehun’s hand does not weaken. But there is also determination.
“Luhan,” the lord says, hands pressing against the gateway, “You will begin transforming into a human the moment you set foot through the gate. Do you understand?” Luhan nods once. “And don’t look back until you’ve made it to the other side. Do not under any circumstances look back.”
"Why? What happens if he looks back?" Sehun asks without thinking, biting his lip when Luhan gives him a frightened look.
"If he looks back, my dear friend," Zitao answers dimly, "He will disappear. The spell will backfire if he does not keep going." Sehun's eyes widen involuntarily and he glances at Luhan to see a guilty expression on the archangel’s face.
Was this another thing Luhan knew, but neglected to tell him?
“Don’t worry, Sehunnie,” Luhan says, giving the human a reassuring smile. “I won’t look back. I promise.”
“Now where the hell is Kai?” Kris cuts in, looking around impatiently. “He’s supposed to lead you the rest of the way to the human realm.”
“I’m right here, dumbass,” comes an irritable voice. Sehun looks behind to see the Lie making its way down the steps, a frown visible on his crooked lips. “I still don’t see why I have to be the one to show them the way out. Krissy-poo would obviously love to do it.”
“You,” Zitao says firmly, “must be the one to do this. Kris cannot do it, nor can anyone else. There’s a price to pay for mistakes, Kai, so don’t think you can get out of this.” The rest of the party looks questioningly between the lord and the Lie, but Kai remains silent, approaching the gate with the same annoyed twitch to his mouth.
“I’m going to open the gate now,” the lord continues, turning a soft gaze on the two males standing next to him. “Sehun, Luhan, I wish you both a happy life. May you meet again.”
“Good luck,” Kris says, gripping Luhan’s shoulder and looking into his eyes. “I have faith in the two of you. I’ll come to check on you occasionally, despite that neither of you will remember me.” He gives a wry smile as Luhan nods.
“It was a pleasure to have known such a true love,” Yixing says. “I believe there are good things in store for the two of you.”
Then, with a few inaudible words and a loud bang, the gate opens itself, and, taking a deep breath, Sehun and Luhan walk through. Kai follows close behind.
The tunnel is exactly how Sehun remembers. With the absence of a torch, the letters in the walls do not avoid them, rather scuttle toward them only to be noiselessly brushed aside by Kai’s merciless hands.
“I hate letters,” the Lie asserts frustratedly. “They’re so much more annoying than numbers. At least numbers know that they shouldn’t go near other beings.” Luhan giggles, his breath tickling Sehun’s neck from their close proximity.
“... Wait, breath!” Sehun mumbles, peering at the former archangel next to him. “Lu, you’re a human now!” Luhan smiles eagerly and nods, exhaling loudly for emphasis.
“Of course he’s a human now,” Kai grumbles, swatting away a Q as it tries to attach itself to his arm. Qs must like people, Sehun concludes. “Lord Zitao said once we passed through the gate, he’d begin the transformation.” Sehun makes a face at him, smiling again as Luhan giggles once more.
“So why is it that you have to guide us?” Luhan asks Kai, clinging onto Sehun’s arm as they make their way through the tunnel.
It should be dark, and Sehun definitely remembers it being darker than this, but he can see somehow, which makes maneuvering the passage rather easy.
“I’m in trouble,” Kai replies, frown still tugging at his mouth. “It’s my punishment for... interfering, you could say.” He glares fiercely as more letters drift toward him.
“Because you told me about the consequences? And about the time you were unconscious-” Sehun shuts his mouth abruptly when Kai’s glare is turned upon him.
“Sort of,” the Lie says, slowing his pace as he sees that he’s getting ahead of the other two. “You guys seem calm for two people about to forget you ever knew each other.” Luhan and Sehun exchange a look, smiling at each other before looking back at Kai who sniffs indignantly.
“Well, I escaped to the human realm a little while ago. I won’t say how, but... Maybe you remember a black cat crossing the road. Or the words, If you love him, you’ll let him go.”
Sehun’s heart skips a beat. A scene plays at the back of his mind. A memory: him, on his way to work, that small black cat approaching a busy street; him, running after the cat, reaching out to grab it but being pulled away, just as a truck is about to hit him; harsh, chastising words and a warm smile on the face of an angel.
It was the first time he met Luhan. Did that mean Kai had been the cat? But what did the other words mean?
When he looks at the former-archangel, his face is pale. “You... you were the Lie... weren’t you?” Luhan says quietly. “You’re the reason I was sent back to the underworld!”
Kai shrugs, smiling sheepishly. “I was experimenting. To see how it felt to be myself again.” Sehun grits his teeth, anger surging through him.
“You mean the reason I had to come here, the reason we have to forget everything is because you decided you wanted to be a Lie?” he asks furiously.
“Now, now, no need to be like that,” Kai shrugs again, flicking a Q across the tunnel wall. “I was also the reason you met in the first place, so don’t complain.” Sehun glares daggers at him, ignoring the warning squeeze Luhan gives his arm.
“I can’t believe you,” Sehun seethes. “Are all Lies as selfish as you are?!” Kai shoots narrowed eyes in his direction.
“I can’t change how I am,” he retorts, “That’s like asking you to stop loving Luhan!” Sehun flinches, subconsciously pulling the elder male closer. “Don’t you see? I’m not meant to live this way. Telling the truth, helping people... it’s not my style.”
“... Then what are you doing right now?” Luhan asks quietly. Kai stops walking altogether, blinking a few times with a blank expression on his face.
“W-well,” he stammers, blushing lightly, “This is punishment! It’s not like I’m helping you two because I actually want to! So don’t get any wrong ideas!”
A smile plays on Luhan’s lips. Those lips are a little too perfect, and Sehun can’t help but lean over and cover them with kisses.
“Ugh, please don’t make out! Please!” Kai groans, shutting his eyes tightly as Luhan deepens the kiss, smiling widely against Sehun’s mouth.
“Oh, shut up,” Sehun murmurs, nuzzling his nose against Luhan’s. “You can deal with it this last time.”
The rest of the journey through the tunnel is quiet, save Kai’s noises of disapproval as the two humans express more acts of intimacy. Sehun’s still mad at him, but he figures it’s probably not a good idea to spend his last minutes in the underworld, upset with any of its occupants.
He wants his last memories of the realm to be good ones, even if he’s going to forget them.
Finally, the exit comes into view. It is a giant, gaping empty space where the tunnel seems to just suddenly stop. If Sehun’s being honest, it’s more than a little nerve wracking, but he’s trying to be stronger. Luhan is beside him now, and that’s what matters.
“This is it,” Kai says, stepping aside to let the humans stand before their final destination. “Once you set foot beyond here, you’ll be in the human realm. Sehun’s life will most likely return to the moments before he met Luhan, and Luhan, your life will be decided as well. For the sake of listening to you suck face this whole time, I truly hope you cross paths again.” Luhan laughs lightly, a smile permanently on his perfect lips, while Sehun blushes.
“Thank you, Kai. I don’t think all Lies are bad,” the former-archangel says. “If a Lie is what lead me to Sehun, then there’s no way that all Lies are bad.” Kai finally grins a bit.
“All right, you saps, get going. I’ve got things I need to do,” he sniffs, scratching his nose with his thumb.
“We’ll see you,” Sehun says, unable to stop himself from smiling as well.
“Yeah, yeah, see you,” Kai waves one hand, turning on his heels to start the trek back.
“Well,” Luhan says, looking at Sehun with tender eyes. Everything he could have said, every word to explain every feeling, is expressed in those beautiful eyes.
“I love you, Luhan,” Sehun murmurs, kissing Luhan one more time.
“I love you, too,” Luhan responds, kissing back.
With one more look, they link arms and step through the final gateway.
part 6