Illegal Palpitations (Chapter 2)
Title: Illegal Palpitations
Rating: NC-17 (for this chapter)
Genre: Romance, Humor, Drama
Pairing: Donghae/Hyukjae
Warning: Smut, coarse language
Summary: It sucks when you’re boyfriend is on the other side of the law, but the rewards for hanging on and believing in that love are much more than Donghae and Hyukjae can ever imagine.
Role-play with tees2mai: She plays Hyukjae and I play Donghae
~*~
This was not part of the plan. Hyukjae had been called for back up, but now he stood among the SWAT team, bullet proof vest over his chest and a gas mask over his face. He held his gun, breathing evenly as he waited for their cue. It was a small team of them, they hadn't predicted more than a handful of the mafia to show up anyway. But Hyukjae knew better and he had not been able to convince his superiors otherwise.
And with no way to contact Donghae, Hyukjae could only hope the other would spot him before it was too late.
He accessed the area around him, remembering all the exits around him as they had been shown on a map and before he could go over the plan in his mind once more- the cue was given and then it all began, Hyukjae and his team running right in. Heading straight towards the trap.
And for a moment, everything seemed to be going well for the SWAT team. Panic ensued when the SWAT team came bursting in. The small group facilitating the packaging of the drugs, letting out cries of surprise, jumping from their positions to try to get out.
Things were going well. Too well. It both confused Hyukjae and made him nervous. But that didn't make him falter from his job. Momentarily forgetting everything but what was happening in that moment, all his focus moved to the man he just hit. Kneeling over him with a knee on his back, Hyukjae moved to handcuff him, ready to move on to the next criminal.
But then, the plan that Donghae had so carefully constructed so as to leave Hyukjae out of the ambush went into action. And seemingly out of nowhere, man began to pour in quietly, taking down the SWAT team that was occupied by the first batch of criminals.
Hyukjae was unprepared for the second string of men coming at them. He was caught off gaurd, the man coming at him much stronger than he was. But that didn't stop him. He fought with him to the best of his abilities- but then there was a blow to his head and Hyukjae was down, blacking out instantly as he hit the ground.
~*~
Donghae could barely stop himself from wincing as he watched his men bring the hostages in. Being mafia men, they weren’t exactly gentle in their goading the hostages to walk. But he couldn’t do anything. If anything he should be encouraging the men, jeering at the prisoners and it was all he could do but watch blankly, giving curt orders to the men on where to bring them.
At least this way, Hyukjae was safe. And at the moment, he was probably back in the police HQ, stressed out on thinking of a plan save his comrades and yet not make Donghae look bad in the process.
And Donghae couldn't be further from the truth of the situation. The hostages were brought in, all thrown together in front of Donghae and the other men in charge, the conscious ones forced on their knees. Slowly they were all uncovered. Hyukjae felt hard jabs at his sides from the back of a riffle as the cover on his face was thrown off. Bright light hit his face and he scrunched his eyes as he regained conscious. His head was aching and he was sure he was bruised all over. He was pushed onto his knees as well but nothing was registering yet. He was still trying to move past the pain he was feeling and had yet to notice where he was and what was going on.
Donghae thought he was seeing things when he glanced at the hostages and saw Hyukjae. Doing a double take, Donghae’s eyes widened as he saw Hyukjae on the floor, bruised and battered. Confused and alarmed, Donghae nearly took a step forward, wanting to run to Hyukjae to make sure he was okay when one of his men noticed his alarm.
“Something wrong, Donghae-nim?”
Coming to his sense, Donghae pretended to stare at the group hard again before shaking his head and then shrugging nonchalantly. “Nah. I just thought we captured our mole by accident. On closer look, his nose was too big.”
That man had better sense than to ask who Donghae thought the mole was, dropping the issue immediately as Donghae had meant him to - only people the boss trusted enough would know, and too many people knowing was dangerous. Asking too much would get a finger or toe chopped off.
Hyukjae groaned softly as he finally looked up, taking in his surroundings. When he finally came to his senses, he quickly become more alert, doing a quick head count of his team. Three missing... Missing or dead? Hyukjae quietly wondered. He had to come up with a plan quick to get them out of there. But it was risky. His men were too beaten up.
Hyukjae looked up to take a count of the other men when his eyes landed on Donghae. He felt his stomach drop and looked away. He had never imaged this happening to them.
Swallowing, Donghae had to force himself to look away from Hyukjae. “Get them to their cells.” He ordered. “Isolate them and keep a tight watch on them. They’re SWAT, so that means their highly capable. Don’t take any chances.” Closing his eyes when he finished his orders, he apologized softly in his head. ‘Sorry, Hyuk. I don’t have any choice.’
Hyukjae could only sigh as he was picked up and roughly shoved towards the cells. He complied with them, dropping in his cell once inside. His wrists were still bound and he could only move so much, but Hyukjae pushed himself onto his feet once the door was shut and quickly began to form plans in his mind. He needed to get out. If anything he couldn't let himself die on Donghae's watch.
~*~
“Get up.”
It was late at night when one of the men opened Hyukjae’s cell, kicking Hyukjae to get him to wake up. Not even waiting for Hyukjae to respond, the man hauled Hyukjae up, forcing him into a walk.
Hyukjae was exhausted. He was keeping track of how long he'd been in his cell but he'd yet to figure out a way to escape. He muffled his cry of pain as he was pulled away and let the guards take him away. There was no point trying to fight yet.
The man brought him up the stairs to the main house, past rows of imposing but gaudy statues and pictures lining a resplendent main corridor, nudging Hyukjae roughly when he thought that other wasn’t moving fast enough. Turning and purposely leading Hyukjae around in circles for him to lose his bearings, the man finally brought him outside the door, knocking on it and opening the door.
Donghae was inside, but he wasn’t alone. Another man was there - one of Hyukjae’s men. And he was kneeling down between Donghae knees, taking Donghae in the mouth - and from the tight grip Donghae had on the man’s hair, it hadn’t had a choice in it.
“I thought it was only common knowledge to wait for me to call you to come in before you did?” Donghae’s voice was soft, but the man beside him stiffened in fear.
“I’m sorry, sir. I’ll go out now.”
“Don’t bother.” Donghae snapped, pushing the other man away, watching emotionlessly as he fell to the ground, gasping. “I’ve had enough of him. Take him away and bring the other one here.”
Though Hyukjae had been through a whole day of exhaustion, beatings and being locked up, watching another man like that with Donghae hurt the most. Despite the situation and despite knowing the reason behind it, it felt like the biggest blow. Hyukjae knew the things Donghae had to do while working but it had been always easier to ignore when he couldn't picture now. But not anymore.
He was practically thrown into his room as his teammate was taken away. The door shut and although Hyukjae could now get up, he stayed where he had been dropped on the door, head spinning.
Donghae made sure that the man was gone before he ran forward, pulling Hyukjae up and examining the other’s body. Frowning at the bruises, Donghae wrapped his arms around Hyukjae gently. “I’m so sorry.” He whispered - for the beatings, for getting Hyukjae hurt - for allowing Hyukjae to see the side of him that he never wanted Hyukjae to see. “I’m so, so sorry, Hyuk.”
Hyukjae winced at the contact, no matter how gentle it still hurt. He didn't say anything yet, listening to him before getting out of his hold. His hands were still tied back and they hurt. He stepped away from Donghae. "We need to figure this out." He said quietly, clearly ignoring his apology and the situation he had been forced to walk in on.
Donghae’s expression feel at Hyukjae’s reaction. But knowing that only pushing the matter would make it worse, Donghae stayed where he was, pulling his legs against his chest. “You just need to wait it out. Lucky for you, the mole the police planted in the gang has already relayed your situation. Tomorrow, there’s going to be a hostage exchange - a few ex-convicts for you. Obviously, my boss isn’t intending to keep up our end of the bargain, but I’ll provide you with a window of opportunity for you and your team to escape.”
Hyukjae nodded slowly, looking down only to notice Donghae's undone pants. He looked away and cleared his throat. "I should probably... in case they walk in again." Hyukjae nodded towards his crotch, not looking at him yet. It was only Hyukjae's pride that kept him from saying much more. This was not the weekend he had planned for at all.
Donghae blinked, before looking down and sighing. “Hyuk.” He said softly. “Are you up to having sex?”
"It would be suspicious if we didn't." Hyukjae replied quietly, trying not to think about how another man's mouth had just been on Donghae.
“No, that’s not what I meant.” Donghae pushed himself up, taking Hyukjae’s hand. “Listen. All the rest... The further extent that I ever went was a blow job. I’ve never stuck it into anyone else. You’re the only one I make love to.”
"Let’s just fuck and get this over with." Hyukjae pulled his hand away quickly. He was exhausted, hungry, thirsty, in pain inside and out. Hyukjae just wanted to back to his own apartment and hide there until he could forget all this. These were the times he rememebered why he had been reluctant to go out with Donghae in the first place. He wondered how many times Donghae had come to him after being with someone else.
“Hyuk...” Donghae pulled Hyukae into his arms again, leaning down and kissing Hyukjae gently, trying to get his feelings across - how sorry he was for Hyukjae having to go through this, and how much he loved Hyukjae, and how much he hurt inside, having Hyukjae to see him doing his work.
He never wanted this to happen either.
“Hyuk...” He whispered, pulling away after a while and gently stroking Hyukjae’s hair. “I’m really sorry. I swear, I feel nothing for those other people. That man earlier? He couldn’t even get me hard. I love you, Hyuk. Only you.”
Hyukjae hated Donghae in that moment, more than ever- How could he say things that would make his heart beat faster when Hyukjae didn't want to forgive him. He couldn't do anything but lean on him, starting to cry as Donghae pulled away from the kiss.
This was unlike Hyukjae. This wasn't the first time he had been captured, but it was the first time where there were too many complications. The main factor being his boyfriend, who just happened to be on the other team.
"I want to go home." He told him, glaring at him without malice. "I don't want to see you for the next two weeks."
Crestfallen, Donghae sighed. Still wondering if he should push ahead or let Hyukjae have his space, his head snapped up when he heard a noise at the door.
Reaching out, he tugged Hyukjae painfully back into him, one hand quickly pushing Hyukjae to the floor. And with a loud, commanding voice he never used with Hyukjae yelled. “I told you to suck it!”
And just in time, for the door opened then. “Sir.”
“What?” Donghae snapped, looking up, a ferocious look on his face - so terrifying that the man physically backpedalled. “B-boss wants to see you.”
Pausing, Donghae nodded, dropping his hold on Hyukjae. “Alright. I’ll go get ready. Keep this man here. Cuff him to the bed. I’m not done with him yet. Get him some water. I want him at least able to use his mouth when I get back.”
Hyukjae winced when he was pushed onto his knees, eyes tearing up a little again. He waited for Donghae to leave and that's when he was picked up, his hands finally freed. He sighed in relief for a moment, only to be cuffed back to the bed, groaning at how roughly the gaurd was handling him. Forcing his movements, hands where they shouldn't have been.
He was given water but it was poured down his throat quickly, almost choking him as he tried to swallow. He hated Donghae's world. He hated seeing sides like this of the man he loved. Hyukjae was barely able to keep awake as his back hit the bed awkwardly, passing out from exhaustion. Hyukjae didn't want to pass out around the guards, but his body gave up before his mind.
~*~
Donghae hadn’t seen Hyukjae in weeks, having taken Hyukjae’s order seriously. He’d avoided going back to the apartment unless necessary, left his special phone that he only used to call Hyukjae at home, throwing himself into his work in order to ignore the gnawing in his heart that longed to see his boyfriend. He spent his time trying to repair the boss’ trust in him after the semi-failure that the hostage plan had been (since the hostages had escaped back instead of getting killed) yet taking care not to turn it into admiration or trust - not the easiest thing in the world to do.
He wasn’t sure he was succeeding really, and mentally exhausted, he found himself going back to their apartment with the excuse of restocking the supplies and that Hyukjae probably wouldn’t be in the apartment anyway.
Hyukjae had been in their apartment. He had managed to get himself a month off and he'd had holed himself up in their apartment. If he was honest with himself it was in hopes Donghae would show up and... and... something. Hyukjae had never managed to think further than that. Because Donghae never showed up. He remembered most of everything that had happened the three days he had been captured. But most things his mind had been slowly suppressing most of the details. They had been too painful for him anyway.
He hadn't bothered taking any care of himself, barely eating, phone switched off, keeping him away from the world. Donghae hadn't called anyway. He had lost some weight and looked paler than usual but Hyukjae hadn't bothered looking okay. He wasn't stepping out of the apartment away.
Sighing, he sat in the kitchen, staring at nothing in particular, bundled up in Donghae's clothes. It was cold in the apartment. Donghae had been the only one able to control their thermostat and now he regretted not learning. He'd always assumed Donghae would be there.
Donghae had been alarmed when he first went in, noticing that there was someone there. But who would be there? Did someone find out about their apartment? Or was it a hapless burglar? It couldn’t be Hyukjae though, not with how he’d made clear that he hadn’t wanted anything to do with Donghae. And why was it so cold?
But then, he noticed the pair of shoes on the landing and paused. Fearful and trying not to keep his hopes up, Donghae called out. “Hyuk...?”
Hyukjae jolted up so fast at the voice, he knocked over his glass. It fell to the ground with a thud, cracking but not breaking, water spilling on the ground. He held onto the table, looking at the entrance of the kitchen, half waiting, half wondering if he had imagined Donghae's voice.
Startled at the loud noise, Donghae rushed forward, fearing for the worst. Was Hyukjae okay, was he hurt, was someone attacking him? And the relief he felt when Hyukjae appeared, skinnier, tired but otherwise whole, what could he do but rush forward, wrapping Hyukjae up in his arms. “Hyukjae...” He whispered. “Oh... god... Hyuk... You scared me... for a moment... I thought...”
And he couldn’t continue, fearing that his voice would break.
Hyukjae held him back, missing him so damn much. He let Donghae talk and hold him as well, sighing softly as the familiar and much needed warmth of Donghae was wrapped around him. Donghae's sweaters just weren't the same.
He took a deep breath and pressed his face into his chest.
It took a long, long while before Donghae could speak again, breathing in Hyukjae’s scent to calm himself down. Finally, he whispered softly, “Hyuk? Why... are you here? I thought you didn’t want to see me?”
"Why would I mean that?" He punched Donghae in the stomach with as much force as he had. Which was nothing at all compared to the force he used to have. "I need you... I said all those things because I was so angry and so hurt."
“Ow.” Donghae muttered, but there was no real meaning to the utterance. He’d barely felt the punch. “I’m sorry. I just thought... I thought you needed some space, so I waited for you to call... but you never did.”
"...I was afraid to call." Hyukjae looked away, wrapping his arms around himself.
Donghae’s heart plummeted at that. Biting his lip, he nearly didn’t dare to ask. “Why?”
Hyukjae sighed, not looking at him yet. "I was afraid of what I'd overhear." He pulled down the sleeves of the sweater a little more, over his hands.
“Hyuk...” Donghae sighed, shaking his head. “I wouldn’t answer if I was in the middle of something, you know that.”
"That was my other fear." Hyukjae looked at him finally, face blank.
“Your...” Then Donghae realized what Hyukjae meant by ‘the middle of something’. “No!” Then toning his voice down when he realized he’d answered too forcefully. “No... no... Hyuk. I didn’t do anything like that. How could I? I made every excuse to get out of it. Even when boss- even when boss sent... gifts. I sent them away.”
"I never used to think about such things. I knew they happened... I just... I just never thought about it and you." He spoke softly. "It'll just take some time for me to get used to the idea. My mind keeps making me think about you being with someone and then coming back here to be with me like that as well and suddenly nothing feels special. I think I'm still in shock from the kidnapping... I don't know."
“Hyuk, look at me.” Donghae cupped Hyukjae’s cheek, his eyes pleading. “Please, Hyuk. I never... those other people Hyuk, they’re nothing to me. They’re just... a job. Please Hyuk, you have to believe me when I say this. I love you. Only you.”
Hyukjae put his hands over Donghae's holding them tightly. "Can we just forget that weekend right now? I really just need to be with you. I don't want to talk about anyone else, think about anyone else... I just... I can't right now. I love you too." Hyukjae finally replied, slowly starting to cry.
Donghae nodded his head, the pain clear in his eyes, but he didn’t say anything only leaning down to kiss Hyukjae softly on the lips.
Hyukjae grabbed him by the shirt, pulling him close, deepening the kiss rapidly. He pulled away just as quick, resting their foreheads together. "Sorry... I don't have the energy." Hyukjae shivered.
“It’s alright.” Donghae murmured, tightening his hold. “Let’s get you to bed.” And picking Hyukjae up, he carried the other to their bed, carefully laying it down. “Be right back, I’ll go set the thermostat.” He smiled. “You should learn to use it one day.”
Hyukjae managed a small smile at that. "I have you. I don't need to learn." He told him firmly, refusing to learn. It was his way of showing he was dependent on Donghae.
“Alright.” Donghae shook his head, smiling. He set the thermostat as fast as he could, quickly going back. “There. Make some space for me?” He chuckled, crawling into the bed.
Hyukjae scooted over, making room for him but immediately eliminating all space between them once Donghae settled into bed.
Not protesting in the least, Donghae pulled Hyukjae close, softly kissing Hyukjae again. “Sleep. I’ll be here when you wake up.” He promised.
~*~
“Where was your ass the past few days? The superiors have been dumping your work on me.”
Hyukjae almost sighed at the voice as he walked back to his desk for the first time in a month. Sure his vacation time had ended a week ago, but Hyukjae had shut himself away from the world for an extra week just to be with Donghae a little longer. He sat down and looked over at his partner. "Family issues." Hyukjae stuck with his usual reply.
“Family issues, huh?” Hyukjae’s partner slid into the extra chair Hyukjae had in his cubicle. “Funny... that guy didn’t look like your brother. And he looked too young for your father. So... maybe he’s your cousin?”
"What guy, Kyuhyun?" Hyukjae spared him a glance, picking up the files that had been piling up on his table. He flipped through the first one, obviously ready to start working.
Kyuhyun looked around before inching closer, lowering his voice. “You know what guy, Hyuk. That hot looking guy whom you spend a good part of your time with in an apartment that is under the name of a person who is conveniently untraceable and I suspect doesn’t exist at all. And the hot looking guy happens to look suspiciously like one of the advisers in the family that we’re investigating.”
Had Hyukjae been unable to control his emotions, he might have broken the pen in his hand. He turned to look at Kyuhyun properly. "You watch too many dramas. It's not good in our profession." Hyukjae rolled his eyes at him, turning back to his file. "You know where I live and just because I chose to spend my free time at home reading instead of being out doesn't mean you can imagine me doing weird things instead. Tch."
“I’m not that bad of an investigator, Hyuk.” Kyuhyun rolled his eyes. “Look, Hyuk. I’m not out to expose you. On the contrary, I’m just worried. I wasn’t particularly looking out, but I caught on to a few suspicious things. I’m not sure how long you’ve been keeping this up, but you slipped for a while back there, and if you’re doing what I think you’re doing, you can’t afford to slip Hyuk. Not even once.”
Hyukjae tensed up as Kyuhyun spoke. He grabbed his chair and pulled him closer, putting his pen down. "How did you find out?" He kept his voice low. Hyukjae didn't care much about what would happen to him but he couldn't allow anything to happen to Donghae. What if someone on Donghae's end found out?
“I was worried about you after that kidnapping fiasco and decided to try to find you. I tracked your car, asked around and found you in that apartment. But just as I’m about to go in to find you, hot guy comes and my police intuition goes out on alarm. A bit of investigation and imagination and the pieces started to fall in place.” Kyuhyun chewed on his lip. “I know what you’re worried about, and he isn’t in danger at the moment, unless someone has access to sensitive government records and is as good of a hacker as me. But he has to be careful, that escape you did during the kidnapping incident did seem a little... staged. That might spark of suspicions on his end.”
Hyukjae sighed, running a hand through his hair. "I don't want to talk about anything to do with the kidnapping." Hyukjae told him. It was still a sore spot for him. "Look just... keep this to yourself. Please. I know it looks stupid as hell but... I'm not... that.... we..." Hyukjae looked frustrated as he tried to explain. "It's got nothing to do with the investigation. I wouldn't ever do anything that ruin all our hard work."
“...So it’s...” Kyuhyun trailed off, not able to bring himself to say the world. “Damn Hyuk. I was hoping that this was some sort of undercover mission to get more information about the family... but Hyuk. This is only going to hurt you.”
"Kyuhyun, I barely go out, do you think I'd pick up a mission where I had to sleep with a man like.... a man like him to get information?" Hyukjae thought of the many insecurities he had faced when Donghae and him had begun dating. "It's been like this for years... you're the first person that found out anything and it was my fault. If I had called you or someone you wouldn't have needed to follow me."
“I know, I know. But I just hoped.” Kyuhyun sighed, rubbing his forehead. “Years huh. And you kept it from everyone, and so did he. It must have been hard... man... I can’t even think of anything I’m that devoted to, even my job, or my computer games.”
Hyukjae realized he was giving away too many details. He shut his mouth instantly and looked away. "How I know you won’t tell anyone anything?" He asked again, avoiding the urge to confide in his friend.
“Who am I going to tell? You’re the supervisors’ pet. I’m just the naughty puppy they put with you to try to restrain me.” Kyuhyun grinned. He was well known to have the sharpest intuition in the force, but his snarky attitude and natural resistance to obey orders straightaway had taken many a promotion from him - not that he minded. He didn’t like all the red-tape and boot-licking happening on the higher levels.
Hyukjae had to smile at him. "You just needed some affection and a walk." He teased him. Hyukjae turned back to his desk, picking up his phone. He quickly typed a message to Donghae and put his phone away again.
txt: Call me.
~*~
Rating: NC-17 (for this chapter)
Genre: Romance, Humor, Drama
Pairing: Donghae/Hyukjae
Warning: Smut, coarse language
Summary: It sucks when you’re boyfriend is on the other side of the law, but the rewards for hanging on and believing in that love are much more than Donghae and Hyukjae can ever imagine.
Role-play with tees2mai: She plays Hyukjae and I play Donghae
~*~
This was not part of the plan. Hyukjae had been called for back up, but now he stood among the SWAT team, bullet proof vest over his chest and a gas mask over his face. He held his gun, breathing evenly as he waited for their cue. It was a small team of them, they hadn't predicted more than a handful of the mafia to show up anyway. But Hyukjae knew better and he had not been able to convince his superiors otherwise.
And with no way to contact Donghae, Hyukjae could only hope the other would spot him before it was too late.
He accessed the area around him, remembering all the exits around him as they had been shown on a map and before he could go over the plan in his mind once more- the cue was given and then it all began, Hyukjae and his team running right in. Heading straight towards the trap.
And for a moment, everything seemed to be going well for the SWAT team. Panic ensued when the SWAT team came bursting in. The small group facilitating the packaging of the drugs, letting out cries of surprise, jumping from their positions to try to get out.
Things were going well. Too well. It both confused Hyukjae and made him nervous. But that didn't make him falter from his job. Momentarily forgetting everything but what was happening in that moment, all his focus moved to the man he just hit. Kneeling over him with a knee on his back, Hyukjae moved to handcuff him, ready to move on to the next criminal.
But then, the plan that Donghae had so carefully constructed so as to leave Hyukjae out of the ambush went into action. And seemingly out of nowhere, man began to pour in quietly, taking down the SWAT team that was occupied by the first batch of criminals.
Hyukjae was unprepared for the second string of men coming at them. He was caught off gaurd, the man coming at him much stronger than he was. But that didn't stop him. He fought with him to the best of his abilities- but then there was a blow to his head and Hyukjae was down, blacking out instantly as he hit the ground.
~*~
Donghae could barely stop himself from wincing as he watched his men bring the hostages in. Being mafia men, they weren’t exactly gentle in their goading the hostages to walk. But he couldn’t do anything. If anything he should be encouraging the men, jeering at the prisoners and it was all he could do but watch blankly, giving curt orders to the men on where to bring them.
At least this way, Hyukjae was safe. And at the moment, he was probably back in the police HQ, stressed out on thinking of a plan save his comrades and yet not make Donghae look bad in the process.
And Donghae couldn't be further from the truth of the situation. The hostages were brought in, all thrown together in front of Donghae and the other men in charge, the conscious ones forced on their knees. Slowly they were all uncovered. Hyukjae felt hard jabs at his sides from the back of a riffle as the cover on his face was thrown off. Bright light hit his face and he scrunched his eyes as he regained conscious. His head was aching and he was sure he was bruised all over. He was pushed onto his knees as well but nothing was registering yet. He was still trying to move past the pain he was feeling and had yet to notice where he was and what was going on.
Donghae thought he was seeing things when he glanced at the hostages and saw Hyukjae. Doing a double take, Donghae’s eyes widened as he saw Hyukjae on the floor, bruised and battered. Confused and alarmed, Donghae nearly took a step forward, wanting to run to Hyukjae to make sure he was okay when one of his men noticed his alarm.
“Something wrong, Donghae-nim?”
Coming to his sense, Donghae pretended to stare at the group hard again before shaking his head and then shrugging nonchalantly. “Nah. I just thought we captured our mole by accident. On closer look, his nose was too big.”
That man had better sense than to ask who Donghae thought the mole was, dropping the issue immediately as Donghae had meant him to - only people the boss trusted enough would know, and too many people knowing was dangerous. Asking too much would get a finger or toe chopped off.
Hyukjae groaned softly as he finally looked up, taking in his surroundings. When he finally came to his senses, he quickly become more alert, doing a quick head count of his team. Three missing... Missing or dead? Hyukjae quietly wondered. He had to come up with a plan quick to get them out of there. But it was risky. His men were too beaten up.
Hyukjae looked up to take a count of the other men when his eyes landed on Donghae. He felt his stomach drop and looked away. He had never imaged this happening to them.
Swallowing, Donghae had to force himself to look away from Hyukjae. “Get them to their cells.” He ordered. “Isolate them and keep a tight watch on them. They’re SWAT, so that means their highly capable. Don’t take any chances.” Closing his eyes when he finished his orders, he apologized softly in his head. ‘Sorry, Hyuk. I don’t have any choice.’
Hyukjae could only sigh as he was picked up and roughly shoved towards the cells. He complied with them, dropping in his cell once inside. His wrists were still bound and he could only move so much, but Hyukjae pushed himself onto his feet once the door was shut and quickly began to form plans in his mind. He needed to get out. If anything he couldn't let himself die on Donghae's watch.
~*~
“Get up.”
It was late at night when one of the men opened Hyukjae’s cell, kicking Hyukjae to get him to wake up. Not even waiting for Hyukjae to respond, the man hauled Hyukjae up, forcing him into a walk.
Hyukjae was exhausted. He was keeping track of how long he'd been in his cell but he'd yet to figure out a way to escape. He muffled his cry of pain as he was pulled away and let the guards take him away. There was no point trying to fight yet.
The man brought him up the stairs to the main house, past rows of imposing but gaudy statues and pictures lining a resplendent main corridor, nudging Hyukjae roughly when he thought that other wasn’t moving fast enough. Turning and purposely leading Hyukjae around in circles for him to lose his bearings, the man finally brought him outside the door, knocking on it and opening the door.
Donghae was inside, but he wasn’t alone. Another man was there - one of Hyukjae’s men. And he was kneeling down between Donghae knees, taking Donghae in the mouth - and from the tight grip Donghae had on the man’s hair, it hadn’t had a choice in it.
“I thought it was only common knowledge to wait for me to call you to come in before you did?” Donghae’s voice was soft, but the man beside him stiffened in fear.
“I’m sorry, sir. I’ll go out now.”
“Don’t bother.” Donghae snapped, pushing the other man away, watching emotionlessly as he fell to the ground, gasping. “I’ve had enough of him. Take him away and bring the other one here.”
Though Hyukjae had been through a whole day of exhaustion, beatings and being locked up, watching another man like that with Donghae hurt the most. Despite the situation and despite knowing the reason behind it, it felt like the biggest blow. Hyukjae knew the things Donghae had to do while working but it had been always easier to ignore when he couldn't picture now. But not anymore.
He was practically thrown into his room as his teammate was taken away. The door shut and although Hyukjae could now get up, he stayed where he had been dropped on the door, head spinning.
Donghae made sure that the man was gone before he ran forward, pulling Hyukjae up and examining the other’s body. Frowning at the bruises, Donghae wrapped his arms around Hyukjae gently. “I’m so sorry.” He whispered - for the beatings, for getting Hyukjae hurt - for allowing Hyukjae to see the side of him that he never wanted Hyukjae to see. “I’m so, so sorry, Hyuk.”
Hyukjae winced at the contact, no matter how gentle it still hurt. He didn't say anything yet, listening to him before getting out of his hold. His hands were still tied back and they hurt. He stepped away from Donghae. "We need to figure this out." He said quietly, clearly ignoring his apology and the situation he had been forced to walk in on.
Donghae’s expression feel at Hyukjae’s reaction. But knowing that only pushing the matter would make it worse, Donghae stayed where he was, pulling his legs against his chest. “You just need to wait it out. Lucky for you, the mole the police planted in the gang has already relayed your situation. Tomorrow, there’s going to be a hostage exchange - a few ex-convicts for you. Obviously, my boss isn’t intending to keep up our end of the bargain, but I’ll provide you with a window of opportunity for you and your team to escape.”
Hyukjae nodded slowly, looking down only to notice Donghae's undone pants. He looked away and cleared his throat. "I should probably... in case they walk in again." Hyukjae nodded towards his crotch, not looking at him yet. It was only Hyukjae's pride that kept him from saying much more. This was not the weekend he had planned for at all.
Donghae blinked, before looking down and sighing. “Hyuk.” He said softly. “Are you up to having sex?”
"It would be suspicious if we didn't." Hyukjae replied quietly, trying not to think about how another man's mouth had just been on Donghae.
“No, that’s not what I meant.” Donghae pushed himself up, taking Hyukjae’s hand. “Listen. All the rest... The further extent that I ever went was a blow job. I’ve never stuck it into anyone else. You’re the only one I make love to.”
"Let’s just fuck and get this over with." Hyukjae pulled his hand away quickly. He was exhausted, hungry, thirsty, in pain inside and out. Hyukjae just wanted to back to his own apartment and hide there until he could forget all this. These were the times he rememebered why he had been reluctant to go out with Donghae in the first place. He wondered how many times Donghae had come to him after being with someone else.
“Hyuk...” Donghae pulled Hyukae into his arms again, leaning down and kissing Hyukjae gently, trying to get his feelings across - how sorry he was for Hyukjae having to go through this, and how much he loved Hyukjae, and how much he hurt inside, having Hyukjae to see him doing his work.
He never wanted this to happen either.
“Hyuk...” He whispered, pulling away after a while and gently stroking Hyukjae’s hair. “I’m really sorry. I swear, I feel nothing for those other people. That man earlier? He couldn’t even get me hard. I love you, Hyuk. Only you.”
Hyukjae hated Donghae in that moment, more than ever- How could he say things that would make his heart beat faster when Hyukjae didn't want to forgive him. He couldn't do anything but lean on him, starting to cry as Donghae pulled away from the kiss.
This was unlike Hyukjae. This wasn't the first time he had been captured, but it was the first time where there were too many complications. The main factor being his boyfriend, who just happened to be on the other team.
"I want to go home." He told him, glaring at him without malice. "I don't want to see you for the next two weeks."
Crestfallen, Donghae sighed. Still wondering if he should push ahead or let Hyukjae have his space, his head snapped up when he heard a noise at the door.
Reaching out, he tugged Hyukjae painfully back into him, one hand quickly pushing Hyukjae to the floor. And with a loud, commanding voice he never used with Hyukjae yelled. “I told you to suck it!”
And just in time, for the door opened then. “Sir.”
“What?” Donghae snapped, looking up, a ferocious look on his face - so terrifying that the man physically backpedalled. “B-boss wants to see you.”
Pausing, Donghae nodded, dropping his hold on Hyukjae. “Alright. I’ll go get ready. Keep this man here. Cuff him to the bed. I’m not done with him yet. Get him some water. I want him at least able to use his mouth when I get back.”
Hyukjae winced when he was pushed onto his knees, eyes tearing up a little again. He waited for Donghae to leave and that's when he was picked up, his hands finally freed. He sighed in relief for a moment, only to be cuffed back to the bed, groaning at how roughly the gaurd was handling him. Forcing his movements, hands where they shouldn't have been.
He was given water but it was poured down his throat quickly, almost choking him as he tried to swallow. He hated Donghae's world. He hated seeing sides like this of the man he loved. Hyukjae was barely able to keep awake as his back hit the bed awkwardly, passing out from exhaustion. Hyukjae didn't want to pass out around the guards, but his body gave up before his mind.
~*~
Donghae hadn’t seen Hyukjae in weeks, having taken Hyukjae’s order seriously. He’d avoided going back to the apartment unless necessary, left his special phone that he only used to call Hyukjae at home, throwing himself into his work in order to ignore the gnawing in his heart that longed to see his boyfriend. He spent his time trying to repair the boss’ trust in him after the semi-failure that the hostage plan had been (since the hostages had escaped back instead of getting killed) yet taking care not to turn it into admiration or trust - not the easiest thing in the world to do.
He wasn’t sure he was succeeding really, and mentally exhausted, he found himself going back to their apartment with the excuse of restocking the supplies and that Hyukjae probably wouldn’t be in the apartment anyway.
Hyukjae had been in their apartment. He had managed to get himself a month off and he'd had holed himself up in their apartment. If he was honest with himself it was in hopes Donghae would show up and... and... something. Hyukjae had never managed to think further than that. Because Donghae never showed up. He remembered most of everything that had happened the three days he had been captured. But most things his mind had been slowly suppressing most of the details. They had been too painful for him anyway.
He hadn't bothered taking any care of himself, barely eating, phone switched off, keeping him away from the world. Donghae hadn't called anyway. He had lost some weight and looked paler than usual but Hyukjae hadn't bothered looking okay. He wasn't stepping out of the apartment away.
Sighing, he sat in the kitchen, staring at nothing in particular, bundled up in Donghae's clothes. It was cold in the apartment. Donghae had been the only one able to control their thermostat and now he regretted not learning. He'd always assumed Donghae would be there.
Donghae had been alarmed when he first went in, noticing that there was someone there. But who would be there? Did someone find out about their apartment? Or was it a hapless burglar? It couldn’t be Hyukjae though, not with how he’d made clear that he hadn’t wanted anything to do with Donghae. And why was it so cold?
But then, he noticed the pair of shoes on the landing and paused. Fearful and trying not to keep his hopes up, Donghae called out. “Hyuk...?”
Hyukjae jolted up so fast at the voice, he knocked over his glass. It fell to the ground with a thud, cracking but not breaking, water spilling on the ground. He held onto the table, looking at the entrance of the kitchen, half waiting, half wondering if he had imagined Donghae's voice.
Startled at the loud noise, Donghae rushed forward, fearing for the worst. Was Hyukjae okay, was he hurt, was someone attacking him? And the relief he felt when Hyukjae appeared, skinnier, tired but otherwise whole, what could he do but rush forward, wrapping Hyukjae up in his arms. “Hyukjae...” He whispered. “Oh... god... Hyuk... You scared me... for a moment... I thought...”
And he couldn’t continue, fearing that his voice would break.
Hyukjae held him back, missing him so damn much. He let Donghae talk and hold him as well, sighing softly as the familiar and much needed warmth of Donghae was wrapped around him. Donghae's sweaters just weren't the same.
He took a deep breath and pressed his face into his chest.
It took a long, long while before Donghae could speak again, breathing in Hyukjae’s scent to calm himself down. Finally, he whispered softly, “Hyuk? Why... are you here? I thought you didn’t want to see me?”
"Why would I mean that?" He punched Donghae in the stomach with as much force as he had. Which was nothing at all compared to the force he used to have. "I need you... I said all those things because I was so angry and so hurt."
“Ow.” Donghae muttered, but there was no real meaning to the utterance. He’d barely felt the punch. “I’m sorry. I just thought... I thought you needed some space, so I waited for you to call... but you never did.”
"...I was afraid to call." Hyukjae looked away, wrapping his arms around himself.
Donghae’s heart plummeted at that. Biting his lip, he nearly didn’t dare to ask. “Why?”
Hyukjae sighed, not looking at him yet. "I was afraid of what I'd overhear." He pulled down the sleeves of the sweater a little more, over his hands.
“Hyuk...” Donghae sighed, shaking his head. “I wouldn’t answer if I was in the middle of something, you know that.”
"That was my other fear." Hyukjae looked at him finally, face blank.
“Your...” Then Donghae realized what Hyukjae meant by ‘the middle of something’. “No!” Then toning his voice down when he realized he’d answered too forcefully. “No... no... Hyuk. I didn’t do anything like that. How could I? I made every excuse to get out of it. Even when boss- even when boss sent... gifts. I sent them away.”
"I never used to think about such things. I knew they happened... I just... I just never thought about it and you." He spoke softly. "It'll just take some time for me to get used to the idea. My mind keeps making me think about you being with someone and then coming back here to be with me like that as well and suddenly nothing feels special. I think I'm still in shock from the kidnapping... I don't know."
“Hyuk, look at me.” Donghae cupped Hyukjae’s cheek, his eyes pleading. “Please, Hyuk. I never... those other people Hyuk, they’re nothing to me. They’re just... a job. Please Hyuk, you have to believe me when I say this. I love you. Only you.”
Hyukjae put his hands over Donghae's holding them tightly. "Can we just forget that weekend right now? I really just need to be with you. I don't want to talk about anyone else, think about anyone else... I just... I can't right now. I love you too." Hyukjae finally replied, slowly starting to cry.
Donghae nodded his head, the pain clear in his eyes, but he didn’t say anything only leaning down to kiss Hyukjae softly on the lips.
Hyukjae grabbed him by the shirt, pulling him close, deepening the kiss rapidly. He pulled away just as quick, resting their foreheads together. "Sorry... I don't have the energy." Hyukjae shivered.
“It’s alright.” Donghae murmured, tightening his hold. “Let’s get you to bed.” And picking Hyukjae up, he carried the other to their bed, carefully laying it down. “Be right back, I’ll go set the thermostat.” He smiled. “You should learn to use it one day.”
Hyukjae managed a small smile at that. "I have you. I don't need to learn." He told him firmly, refusing to learn. It was his way of showing he was dependent on Donghae.
“Alright.” Donghae shook his head, smiling. He set the thermostat as fast as he could, quickly going back. “There. Make some space for me?” He chuckled, crawling into the bed.
Hyukjae scooted over, making room for him but immediately eliminating all space between them once Donghae settled into bed.
Not protesting in the least, Donghae pulled Hyukjae close, softly kissing Hyukjae again. “Sleep. I’ll be here when you wake up.” He promised.
~*~
“Where was your ass the past few days? The superiors have been dumping your work on me.”
Hyukjae almost sighed at the voice as he walked back to his desk for the first time in a month. Sure his vacation time had ended a week ago, but Hyukjae had shut himself away from the world for an extra week just to be with Donghae a little longer. He sat down and looked over at his partner. "Family issues." Hyukjae stuck with his usual reply.
“Family issues, huh?” Hyukjae’s partner slid into the extra chair Hyukjae had in his cubicle. “Funny... that guy didn’t look like your brother. And he looked too young for your father. So... maybe he’s your cousin?”
"What guy, Kyuhyun?" Hyukjae spared him a glance, picking up the files that had been piling up on his table. He flipped through the first one, obviously ready to start working.
Kyuhyun looked around before inching closer, lowering his voice. “You know what guy, Hyuk. That hot looking guy whom you spend a good part of your time with in an apartment that is under the name of a person who is conveniently untraceable and I suspect doesn’t exist at all. And the hot looking guy happens to look suspiciously like one of the advisers in the family that we’re investigating.”
Had Hyukjae been unable to control his emotions, he might have broken the pen in his hand. He turned to look at Kyuhyun properly. "You watch too many dramas. It's not good in our profession." Hyukjae rolled his eyes at him, turning back to his file. "You know where I live and just because I chose to spend my free time at home reading instead of being out doesn't mean you can imagine me doing weird things instead. Tch."
“I’m not that bad of an investigator, Hyuk.” Kyuhyun rolled his eyes. “Look, Hyuk. I’m not out to expose you. On the contrary, I’m just worried. I wasn’t particularly looking out, but I caught on to a few suspicious things. I’m not sure how long you’ve been keeping this up, but you slipped for a while back there, and if you’re doing what I think you’re doing, you can’t afford to slip Hyuk. Not even once.”
Hyukjae tensed up as Kyuhyun spoke. He grabbed his chair and pulled him closer, putting his pen down. "How did you find out?" He kept his voice low. Hyukjae didn't care much about what would happen to him but he couldn't allow anything to happen to Donghae. What if someone on Donghae's end found out?
“I was worried about you after that kidnapping fiasco and decided to try to find you. I tracked your car, asked around and found you in that apartment. But just as I’m about to go in to find you, hot guy comes and my police intuition goes out on alarm. A bit of investigation and imagination and the pieces started to fall in place.” Kyuhyun chewed on his lip. “I know what you’re worried about, and he isn’t in danger at the moment, unless someone has access to sensitive government records and is as good of a hacker as me. But he has to be careful, that escape you did during the kidnapping incident did seem a little... staged. That might spark of suspicions on his end.”
Hyukjae sighed, running a hand through his hair. "I don't want to talk about anything to do with the kidnapping." Hyukjae told him. It was still a sore spot for him. "Look just... keep this to yourself. Please. I know it looks stupid as hell but... I'm not... that.... we..." Hyukjae looked frustrated as he tried to explain. "It's got nothing to do with the investigation. I wouldn't ever do anything that ruin all our hard work."
“...So it’s...” Kyuhyun trailed off, not able to bring himself to say the world. “Damn Hyuk. I was hoping that this was some sort of undercover mission to get more information about the family... but Hyuk. This is only going to hurt you.”
"Kyuhyun, I barely go out, do you think I'd pick up a mission where I had to sleep with a man like.... a man like him to get information?" Hyukjae thought of the many insecurities he had faced when Donghae and him had begun dating. "It's been like this for years... you're the first person that found out anything and it was my fault. If I had called you or someone you wouldn't have needed to follow me."
“I know, I know. But I just hoped.” Kyuhyun sighed, rubbing his forehead. “Years huh. And you kept it from everyone, and so did he. It must have been hard... man... I can’t even think of anything I’m that devoted to, even my job, or my computer games.”
Hyukjae realized he was giving away too many details. He shut his mouth instantly and looked away. "How I know you won’t tell anyone anything?" He asked again, avoiding the urge to confide in his friend.
“Who am I going to tell? You’re the supervisors’ pet. I’m just the naughty puppy they put with you to try to restrain me.” Kyuhyun grinned. He was well known to have the sharpest intuition in the force, but his snarky attitude and natural resistance to obey orders straightaway had taken many a promotion from him - not that he minded. He didn’t like all the red-tape and boot-licking happening on the higher levels.
Hyukjae had to smile at him. "You just needed some affection and a walk." He teased him. Hyukjae turned back to his desk, picking up his phone. He quickly typed a message to Donghae and put his phone away again.
txt: Call me.
~*~