(no subject)
things have been going so great that i hadnt need to write in this. but now im pisssed at myself for not following through with what i wanted to do. i just want to live life, happy, sad whatever, and to be excited aobut it. but i let negative thoughts and tears stop me from doing that. its only after i get so upset that i realize that im not doing what i wanted to do. what i really wanted to do was to be happy about everything but i have to realize that that is just not possible. life is equal parts good and bad if not more bad. so i have to just accept it and deal and move on. i think that that is part of the beauty of it all. to be able to see the bad as just something that has to be done in order to acheive greater things. but when things are bad it just seems that there is no such thing as good.
he who has not tasted the bitter does not understand the sweet. a fortune cookie
i feel like venting and getting angry and crying and feeling any kind of emotion is like a mistake cos once the tears are gone and things seem okay again, i feel like ive learned something. like right now. im just babbling about something that you probly will never understand cos i suck at explaining things and using so called words. im too serious. life is life. it is what it is. there may be no meaning behind it, there may be no more happy days. but thats no reason to sit here and sulk. i want to make the best of it even when it sucks. i have this thing where i always look on the bright side when other people are feeling poopy and im a much stronger person when its for someone else. but when it comes to myself i become insecure and negative and i feel like there is no hope. i think that is rediculous.............
i dont know im getting better at the whole expressing myself ordeal, at least i feel i am. feel. thats a word ive been relying on lately. what i feel instead of what i think. im slowly, more and more everyday, becoming taht ideal image of myself. the image i always thought i was/ would be. its cool to think of things that way. but then its like long term and most things arent long term. and yet everyone thinks that tomorrow is definite and ill have the realizatino tonight taht its not but tomorrow ill be back to thinking that the day after is definite, because there is just not enough time in a day to do everything that one wishes to do in an entire lifetime.
he who has not tasted the bitter does not understand the sweet. a fortune cookie
i feel like venting and getting angry and crying and feeling any kind of emotion is like a mistake cos once the tears are gone and things seem okay again, i feel like ive learned something. like right now. im just babbling about something that you probly will never understand cos i suck at explaining things and using so called words. im too serious. life is life. it is what it is. there may be no meaning behind it, there may be no more happy days. but thats no reason to sit here and sulk. i want to make the best of it even when it sucks. i have this thing where i always look on the bright side when other people are feeling poopy and im a much stronger person when its for someone else. but when it comes to myself i become insecure and negative and i feel like there is no hope. i think that is rediculous.............
i dont know im getting better at the whole expressing myself ordeal, at least i feel i am. feel. thats a word ive been relying on lately. what i feel instead of what i think. im slowly, more and more everyday, becoming taht ideal image of myself. the image i always thought i was/ would be. its cool to think of things that way. but then its like long term and most things arent long term. and yet everyone thinks that tomorrow is definite and ill have the realizatino tonight taht its not but tomorrow ill be back to thinking that the day after is definite, because there is just not enough time in a day to do everything that one wishes to do in an entire lifetime.