Spice - Chapter 15

[eimeo]

Title: Spice
Author: eimeo
Beta: penguin_attie
Universe/Series: TOS
Rating: NC-17
Relationship status: Pre-slash to slash
Chapter: 15/54
Pairings: Kirk/Spock
Additional Pairings: Kirk/Lori
Summary: It’s a question of biology. Vulcan biology.
The problem with falling in love with a member of an insanely private species is that it just might take you

Comments

[aldora89]

I literally squealed "yay, Spice!" out loud when I saw the chapter update on the K/S comm. Just thought you should know.

God, this chapter was viscerally painful to read. I had knots in my stomach every time you described Jim's subtle gestures of sadness, and every time Spock was obviously avoiding his emotions. I kept pausing to tip my head back against the wall and away from the screen when I couldn't deal with a particular line or paragraph. I saw everything in my head exactly as if it were an episode - I can't imagine the end of the mission going any other way now. The sense of melancholy is palpable, and it just hangs over this chapter like a dark cloud.

I especially liked the hints of Kirk/Lori, as seen through the vibes that Spock picks up on (and the delicate sense of jealousy/anxiety he's suppressing about it). I envy the way you handle both the boys, but especially Spock. You write as if you were inside his head. When people have life problems, they usually don't angst over them 24/7, but it still colors everything they think and do. You capture that fact so effortlessly, and the realism it lends the story is incredible. Spock never has to identify or reflect on what he's feeling for the reader to get the picture. That's a level of showing and not telling that leaves me in awe.

Can't wait for the next chapter (and the dinner date, mmmyes)! XD

[eimeo]

Yay!!! I do that too when a fic I'm reading updates (there may also be happydancing, depending on the fic...) and I can't tell you how exciting it is to think about someone doing that for "Spice!" YAY!!!

Thank you so much for this! It's great to know that all these things that I'm hoping to get across are actually coming across. I love writing Spock's POV; I identify more closely with him than I do with Jim, but he's also a real challenge to write. There's all these emotions swirling around, and he's not exactly connecting with them... "That's a level of showing and not telling that leaves me in awe" - THANK YOU so much for this!! The trouble with trying to show and not tell is that I'm never sure if I'm showing enough or too much or in the right way, or if any of it's reading the way it does in my head. Thank you again. I will try to oblige with the next chapter as quickly as possible!