It's fine. It's fine. This is fine. I'm fine.

Insert the dog with the coffee and the flames image here...

Honestly, though, I am. I have a job, a house, my pets, friends, etc. I'm not an extrovert so this whole staying home thing isn't really a big deal. I'm staying where I am for Thanksgiving, but will go home to my parents (driving) for ( Read more... )

(Content Warning: depression, animal death)

I've been meaning to post for about 9 days now, but life has been weird. Up and down, mostly down, I guess, but I'm okay.

The night of the election was rough. It's one thing to be told that the mail-in ballots would take a long time to count and we wouldn't know the winner on Tuesday, but it's another to ( Read more... )

 In these days of daily Zoom calls (and appropriately also the day that analyst Jeffrey Toobin was suspended from the New Yorker for masturbating while on a video conference), it seems like today is the perfect day for what just happened.

I'm teaching entirely online this semester. (Next semester, barring Covid shutting down the whole campus, I'm ( Read more... )

 I feel like crud, but at least it's not emotional crud? For the past few days I've been low-key nauseated and light-headed, which has not been fun. Especially since my university switched to 8 week blocks instead of full semesters. (They used the pandemic as an excuse but I think it's something administration wanted to do anyway.) This means that ( Read more... )

 I'm still here.

I've been doing better. I saw a new counselor, which was awkward (face masks. And she works for the university) but also kind of nice. My psychiatrist agreed that the medicine switch-- even though it was just formulations-- may have caused the crash and switched me back. The rest of the week was better; not 100% but miles and miles ( Read more... )

 Typically, I'm a hurry-up-and-wait kind of girl. What I mean is, when I have to get something done,  I'll do things in a flurry of activity (clean? dishes? cat boxes? grading?) and I'll also be super lazy and lie on the couch. (some other day I'll investigate a bit more about all of that but that's not today's point.) But when I'm in a depressive ( Read more... )

 I started my LiveJournal in 2001. I only remember this because I can, oddly, picture myself in my college, senior-year dorm room, writing about how I'd probably forget that I had an LJ within a few weeks. Instead, I kept it regularly for more than a decade. I made online friends and kept in contact with IRL ones.

But what I remember most about LJ ( Read more... )

I'm still here ( Read more... )

(This is a hell of a way to come back to Livejournal. More about that choice some other day.)

Wednesday morning I received the kind of phone call no one wants. After a brief game of phone tag, I learned that Tamnonlinear is gone. She died by suicide sometime the night before ( Read more... )