Title: The Key
Author: eigthnote
Genre: Humor/Romance
Summary: Mike, to Harvey’s great amusement, delves into the subtle nuances that define a relationship; for instance, the exchanging of loft keys and the use of pet names like “hunnybunny.”
The Key
-Harvey, who had been previously engrossed in the mounds of paperwork scattered across his desk, raised an eyebrow as Mike entered his office. He had, to Harvey's exasperation, forgotten to knock.
"You forgot to knock," Harvey stated irritably as Mike sprawled himself lazily on the sofa across from Harvey's desk.
"I'm sleeping with you," Mike retorted with a smug smirk. "I feel that, as your boyfriend, I have transcended those formalities customary to a formal employer-employee relationship."
Harvey had to muster every ounce of self restraint he had to resist the temptation of rolling his eyes. Instead, he opted to ignore Mike in the hopes of completing the cumbersome task of reading through the documents that remained on his desk before nightfall.
"Why don't I have a key to your apartment yet?"
The abrupt nature of the question made Harvey look back up in mild surprise.
"I'm sorry?" Harvey responded, completely nonplussed.
"Why haven't you given me a key to your apartment yet?" Mike repeated indignantly, pushing himself up into a sitting position on the couch. "We've been dating for nearly four months now and you still haven't given me a key to your place!"
Harvey scratched the back of his head and asked, "Is there really any point in giving you the key to my place? We always leave the office at the same time and we always leave for work together in the mornings, too. What good would a key to my place do for you?"
Mike, who looked rather affronted, crossed his arms against his chest and continued to glare daggers at Harvey.
"It would do a lot of good for me!" Mike exclaimed with a huff.
"Pray tell! Please, elaborate on all of the good that a key to my apartment would do for you," Harvey exclaimed, a trace of mockery trailing the edge of his voice.
"Tradition-no, relationship law-mandates that the billionaire bastard lawyer give his stunningly handsome and exceedingly brilliant boyfriend a key to his billionaire mansion in the sky," Mike stated, flourishing his arms in an overly cartoonish manner to emphasize the "mansion in the sky."
Relationship law? Harvey couldn't suppress a grin. Now thoroughly amused, he tilted himself back into his seat and asked, "You still haven't answered my question. What good could it possibly do for you?"
Mike paused, grasping at the air as if he could pluck the words he needed from the empty space around him.
'It would serve as…tangible proof that our relationship means as much to you as it does to me?" he stated rather lamely.
Suppressing a snort, Harvey vaguely contemplated the idea of a quick coffee break. Between the looming piles of paperwork on his desk and Mike's new found obsession with his apartment, he decidedly reached for his phone with the intention of having his driver bring his limousine around the corner.
"You know absolutely nothing about relationships, Harvey," Mike stated dryly. "You're basically breaking the sacred commandments of relationships."
"Commandments?" Harvey replied, momentarily distracted from the idea of a lunch break. "You're not serious, are you?"
Rolling his eyes, Mike rose from the sofa and walked toward Harvey's desk. Looking down on him with an expression of pity, he stated, "Yes, Harvey, the commandments. Like thou shalt giveth thou boyfriend a key to thouest apartment or thou shalt call thy boyfriend by revolting terms of endearment-"
"Okay," interrupted Harvey, "First, stop saying 'thou'. It's unseemly. Second, what on Earth are you babbling on about? Terms of endearment?"
"Yes, Harvey, terms of endearment," Mike replied impatiently, "Pet names like 'darling' or 'babe'. Maybe even 'hunnybunny' if the mood so strikes you!"
Harvey rose from his desk and cupped Mike's head between his hands.
"You're not using again, are you?" Harvey asked, peering into Mike's eyes.
"No, I am not!" Mike replied angrily, smacking Harvey's hands away from his face. "I just want some sort of reassurance that this relationship isn't some meaningless fling to you."
"You're so insecure sometimes, do you know that?" Harvey asked, stepping around his desk. He grinned as Mike's angry demeanor began to falter as the distance between the two of them continued to shrink.
"So what if I am?" he retorted defensively, averting his gaze to the floor. "I just don't like the idea of investing time and energy into this relationship if you're not even remotely serious about it."
"And you think that a key to my apartment would serve as a token of my love for you?" Harvey asked, amused.
"Quite frankly, yes, I think it would," Mike replied, meeting Harvey's gaze.
Chortling slightly, Harvey leaned in to kiss him. He smiled as Mike wrapped his arms around his neck, tightening his grip as he pressed himself against Harvey's body.
"I love you," Harvey murmured, his head resting on Mike's shoulder.
"Yeah?" Mike replied, his face buried in Harvey's neck. "How much do you love me?"
Harvey paused.
"Bend over this table and I'll show you just how much I love you, hunnybunny."