I'M NOT CATHOLIC
I guess this is more of a rant. But I feel terrible. I just received birthday presents from my parents and oldest sister.
My parents (specifically my dad I suspect) sent me a DVD of a comedian of sorts and it's called "Why Be Catholic?"
My sister sent me several cards and things that mentioned God and being Catholic. I enjoyed her gift, especially the pics of the kids and cards made by my nephew, but she also sent me a book called "Surprised by Truth" about 11 people from mixed backgrounds that converted to Catholicism.
Everytime I talk to my dad on the phone he bugs me about joining the Newman club on campus (campus catholic ministry that is a club on many campuses throughout the country).
I went to Catholic school and was raised in a Catholic family. I struggled for years trying to believe in God and be Catholic but I officially gave up about last year. If God won't help me believe in him, well, surely He does not exist.
I want to tell them but I know that they'll be disappointed and that they'll likely want to blame it on Calvin as he's not religious.
My mom's only Catholic because my dad is, and really my dad is only Catholic because he was raised that way and of course in his opinion that's the right way. I was stuck in a Catholic school for years despite the fact I was miserable and it was a waste of money as far as education goes. But he went to Catholic school so that's the way to go. Thank goodness that there's no Catholic high school anywhere near my hometown. I literally probably would have killed myself.
But my sister really believes in it. She is truly Catholic/ Christian, not like my parents that just go to church once a week and don't eat fish on fridays during lent and call it good. She prays the rosary, helps teach Catholic home school, and uses natural family planning rather than birth control. She pretty much had a life changing experience when she went to see the pope during high school I think.
I know it would hurt her if she knew.
I wish I was religious and I've tried SO hard but in the end it just seems like something people fabricate to make themselves feel better.
I don't know what to do. There's so much they don't know about me.
My parents (specifically my dad I suspect) sent me a DVD of a comedian of sorts and it's called "Why Be Catholic?"
My sister sent me several cards and things that mentioned God and being Catholic. I enjoyed her gift, especially the pics of the kids and cards made by my nephew, but she also sent me a book called "Surprised by Truth" about 11 people from mixed backgrounds that converted to Catholicism.
Everytime I talk to my dad on the phone he bugs me about joining the Newman club on campus (campus catholic ministry that is a club on many campuses throughout the country).
I went to Catholic school and was raised in a Catholic family. I struggled for years trying to believe in God and be Catholic but I officially gave up about last year. If God won't help me believe in him, well, surely He does not exist.
I want to tell them but I know that they'll be disappointed and that they'll likely want to blame it on Calvin as he's not religious.
My mom's only Catholic because my dad is, and really my dad is only Catholic because he was raised that way and of course in his opinion that's the right way. I was stuck in a Catholic school for years despite the fact I was miserable and it was a waste of money as far as education goes. But he went to Catholic school so that's the way to go. Thank goodness that there's no Catholic high school anywhere near my hometown. I literally probably would have killed myself.
But my sister really believes in it. She is truly Catholic/ Christian, not like my parents that just go to church once a week and don't eat fish on fridays during lent and call it good. She prays the rosary, helps teach Catholic home school, and uses natural family planning rather than birth control. She pretty much had a life changing experience when she went to see the pope during high school I think.
I know it would hurt her if she knew.
I wish I was religious and I've tried SO hard but in the end it just seems like something people fabricate to make themselves feel better.
I don't know what to do. There's so much they don't know about me.