(no subject)
I really feel like I've lost touch with my inner drive and motivation. I used to love college because I knew that I was gaining the tools to be successful and make a difference in the world. Even if I didn't particularly care for a class, it was still an opportunity to learn something, whether it be how to bullshit a good paper, improve my speaking skills, etc. Even research seemed to me invaluable in my college experience. This year, I do my homework, I go to class, but it all seems so empty and pointless. Psychology, which I used to love, doesn't move me the way I thought it would when I was taking all the prereqs so I could finally take the fun psych classes. Thats what happens when you set your expectations too high I guess. I'm so ready to start making a difference now. I'm too smart to be wasting away in USF's undergrad psych program for another 2 years!! Its so horrible, that since I feel like I'm not being challenged I've lost all interest in improving myself and actually learning in my classes, rather than just memorizing material for an exam. I looked through the requirements for the nursing and premed programs today... the worst part is that I'm afraid that that would be far too challenging for me. Combined with the fact that I would rather learn nothing else more than psychology leads me to keep my major, for now. Bruce is trying to get me to go to the dark side, engineering! muahaha Who knows? I certainly don't know what I want right now!