The Last Thing on My Mind
For about two days now, I have been trying to figure out what is the last thing on my mind. It's not an easy task because you have to think of all the first things on your mind, then the middle things on your mind, and then there's a lot of false hopes raised as you just think you're thinking of something else. For a while I thought it was "my sisters big toe," but then "ball peen hammer" occurred to me. I was about ready to write that down as the last thing on my mind when "foodelee-doodelee" struck me for some reason, and then in quick succession, "caraway seed," "twelve feet," and "dog pie." But then I realized how stupid I had been. The last thing on my mind was always, "The last thing on my mind." Every time I thought of something, I would check to see if it was "the last thing on my mind." So no matter what I thought of, it was always followed with, "the last thing on my mind." Therefore, according to the law of infinite regression, which says it is illegal for anything to repeat infinitely, the last thing on my mind is "the last thing on my mind."
-- Steve Martin, "Cruel Shoes"
GEICO called my wife to let her know we missed a payment. We don't have an account with GEICO.
LiveJournal avatars are an unwieldy beast. They all use the same filename. The 'Keyword' nomenclature becomes a misnomer at this point, as it suggests a memory aid, and nothing more. If you change the keyword, but keep the picture - lj replaces it with your default. If, however, you change the picture but keep the same keyword, it replaces it. Awkward. This of course only works with similar avatars you wish to replace. Most of this, I believe, could be worked-around if comments were allowed to be edited.
It was Christmas in Hampton, Virginia (...mama's in the kitchen cookin' collard greens...) and photogoot's mother and brother were coming to visit! As I had the master bedroom and didn't sleep on a waterbed (ahem) I gladly gave up my bed so she would be comfortable during her visit. I washed the sheets, made sure my bed skirt was pleated in all the right places, swept the floor, straightened out my hand-knotted rug, but didn't have time to dust. I remember the aroma of scented apples in the apartment the day they arrived, bearing gifts. I took her bags and showed her to her room. She took one step on that rug and her leg slipped right out from underneath her. Paul nearly caught her, but she didn't fall. I do think she twisted something. She avoided the rug the rest of her stay there. During the end of her visit, she was at the mall and wanted to get me a little something for giving up my room that week. Paul suggested something practical. I got a sticky mat to go between the rug and the floor, and a feather duster. Thanks Paul's Mom!
Wife just called. 100 cigars were delivered today!
A beginning is a very delicate time. Know then, that is is the year 10191. The known universe is ruled by the Padishah Emperor Shaddam the Fourth, my father. In this time, the most precious substance in the universe is the spice Melange. The spice extends life. The spice expands consciousness. The spice is vital to space travel. The Spacing Guild and its navigators, who the spice has mutated over 4000 years, use the orange spice gas, which gives them the ability to fold space. That is, travel to any part of the universe without moving. Oh, yes. I forgot to tell you. The spice exists on only one planet in the entire universe. A desolate, dry planet with vast deserts. Hidden away within the rocks of these deserts are a people known as the Fremen, who have long held a prophecy that a man would come, a messiah, who would lead them to true freedom. The planet is Arrakis, also known as Dune.
-- Steve Martin, "Cruel Shoes"
GEICO called my wife to let her know we missed a payment. We don't have an account with GEICO.
LiveJournal avatars are an unwieldy beast. They all use the same filename. The 'Keyword' nomenclature becomes a misnomer at this point, as it suggests a memory aid, and nothing more. If you change the keyword, but keep the picture - lj replaces it with your default. If, however, you change the picture but keep the same keyword, it replaces it. Awkward. This of course only works with similar avatars you wish to replace. Most of this, I believe, could be worked-around if comments were allowed to be edited.
It was Christmas in Hampton, Virginia (...mama's in the kitchen cookin' collard greens...) and photogoot's mother and brother were coming to visit! As I had the master bedroom and didn't sleep on a waterbed (ahem) I gladly gave up my bed so she would be comfortable during her visit. I washed the sheets, made sure my bed skirt was pleated in all the right places, swept the floor, straightened out my hand-knotted rug, but didn't have time to dust. I remember the aroma of scented apples in the apartment the day they arrived, bearing gifts. I took her bags and showed her to her room. She took one step on that rug and her leg slipped right out from underneath her. Paul nearly caught her, but she didn't fall. I do think she twisted something. She avoided the rug the rest of her stay there. During the end of her visit, she was at the mall and wanted to get me a little something for giving up my room that week. Paul suggested something practical. I got a sticky mat to go between the rug and the floor, and a feather duster. Thanks Paul's Mom!
Wife just called. 100 cigars were delivered today!
A beginning is a very delicate time. Know then, that is is the year 10191. The known universe is ruled by the Padishah Emperor Shaddam the Fourth, my father. In this time, the most precious substance in the universe is the spice Melange. The spice extends life. The spice expands consciousness. The spice is vital to space travel. The Spacing Guild and its navigators, who the spice has mutated over 4000 years, use the orange spice gas, which gives them the ability to fold space. That is, travel to any part of the universe without moving. Oh, yes. I forgot to tell you. The spice exists on only one planet in the entire universe. A desolate, dry planet with vast deserts. Hidden away within the rocks of these deserts are a people known as the Fremen, who have long held a prophecy that a man would come, a messiah, who would lead them to true freedom. The planet is Arrakis, also known as Dune.