nice things
Wil came to visit this weekend. We had an awesome time. Heather came with us and we went to the haunted hayrides that Rob works for building sets and doing makeup & creature construction... awesome stuff. And yes, they got a few good screams out of me. "Why is this corn soAAAAAAAAGHHH!"
It was a gorgeous night in a field under a clear moonlit sky. Never fails to make me long for...
[something I can never have.]
Yesterday Cheri came with us to the garlic festival in Saugerties, which was HUGE.
My dad asked Wil why he liked me, or to rephrase it less bluntly, seeing as how it's rare to keep friendships going over spans of years, what is it in this instance? Wil's answer was "kindred spirits," that we share a lot of opinions and like the same things, and I'm personally very opinionated and not afraid to discuss certain things or say what I'm thinking, which is generally what I really mean. Which is true. Today over breakfast he told me I'm a very generous person. "Really? I don't think I am," I said. "Most people don't think they are," he answered. I shrugged. "Mostly I feel selfish." All I could think of was the feelings I could feel [if only]...
Gah, I have to stop that.
My life changed for the better when I made friends with Wil, and with Kristen. I met them the about same time. They were truly kind and patient and didn't expect anything of me but me, which was a relief, and freed me to relax and feel love, I think. Prior to that I always felt on the outs with everyone around me. Which may have entirely been my doing. I admit I was awfully prickly back then. I don't know how to really articulate it, but that's the major thing I attribute it to. People tell me they're still intimidated by me, but that's only because I don't smile like a blithering idiot every moment of every day.
IAM is down right now due to circumstances beyond anyone's control. It's not a technical issue either, which is the most annoying part. Who gives a shit about who's right or wrong, I pay for a goddamned service and I WANT IT.
I have a cold right now, I mostly just want a nap.
It was a gorgeous night in a field under a clear moonlit sky. Never fails to make me long for...
[something I can never have.]
Yesterday Cheri came with us to the garlic festival in Saugerties, which was HUGE.
My dad asked Wil why he liked me, or to rephrase it less bluntly, seeing as how it's rare to keep friendships going over spans of years, what is it in this instance? Wil's answer was "kindred spirits," that we share a lot of opinions and like the same things, and I'm personally very opinionated and not afraid to discuss certain things or say what I'm thinking, which is generally what I really mean. Which is true. Today over breakfast he told me I'm a very generous person. "Really? I don't think I am," I said. "Most people don't think they are," he answered. I shrugged. "Mostly I feel selfish." All I could think of was the feelings I could feel [if only]...
Gah, I have to stop that.
My life changed for the better when I made friends with Wil, and with Kristen. I met them the about same time. They were truly kind and patient and didn't expect anything of me but me, which was a relief, and freed me to relax and feel love, I think. Prior to that I always felt on the outs with everyone around me. Which may have entirely been my doing. I admit I was awfully prickly back then. I don't know how to really articulate it, but that's the major thing I attribute it to. People tell me they're still intimidated by me, but that's only because I don't smile like a blithering idiot every moment of every day.
IAM is down right now due to circumstances beyond anyone's control. It's not a technical issue either, which is the most annoying part. Who gives a shit about who's right or wrong, I pay for a goddamned service and I WANT IT.
I have a cold right now, I mostly just want a nap.