Poké problems
Today, I feel I must talk about something of great importance. Something that has been going on for a long time now. Something many of us have been affected by. I am, of course, talking about ridiculous hair in the Pokémon series. Particularly for the female characters.
I mean, I get it, Pokémon is a Japanese video game, so, naturally, it features "anime style" hair, which has a tendency to be insanely ridiculous, both in its color and gravity-defying ways. But, still. I need to rant, because with every new game, I find myself rolling my eyes at the crazy hair (and sometimes outfits) of the female player character (who, of course, I will be playing as). And with the Black and White 2 characters being revealed today, I feel now is the best time for this rant. Because I'm all fired up. (I'm so on top of the world's most important issues.)
We'll start off with the first female player character ever, Kris from Crystal. Yes, it wasn't until the sixth game in the series that they finally realized girls play Pokémon, too. Don't even get me started on that.
She must use a lot of hair spray, because normal hair does not stick straight up like that. Nor is it blue, or green, or turquoise, or whatever that color is supposed to be.
It's definitely blue in the game. I actually think the back sprite looks pretty cute. Looks like pigtails on a windy day.
May's hair is stupid. Short in the back with long, pigtail-like things in the front. Ew. Also, I hate her Emerald outfit redesign. Green and orange? Yuck.
Okay, let's take a break from ranting because LEAF IS WIN. Seriously, I love her. She is by far my favorite player character ever. She's so CUTE! As well as the most normal looking with her hair style, hair color, and outfit. I honestly adore her. I wish I could always play as her.
Leaf spam because I love her.
Dawn is... okay. Her hair is normal-ish. The color is blue, but it's a dark blue, so it doesn't look as weird as Kris. I think the biggest gripe I have with Dawn is HOW SHORT HER SKIRT IS. Isn't she supposed to be like 10?! And then, for Platinum, which takes place in a much colder climate, they add a heavy jacket and bigger scarf, BUT SHE'S STILL WEARING A SKIRT. That has always bugged me. IT'S COLD, PUT SOME PANTS ON.
For HeartGold and SoulSilver, everyone thought they were going to redesign Kris, since the original Gold and Silver games didn't have a female player character, but they surprised everyone by creating Lyra, a brand new character. I for sure prefer Lyra over Kris. I'm actually rather fond of Lyra. She might be my second favorite after Leaf. Her hat is ginormous and her hair sticks out a bit oddly, but at least it's not straight up in the air like Kris.
Her back sprite just looks like cute pigtails. And I've always found her regular sprite to be just adorable.
Hilda (I hate that name) takes us back to the '80s with BIG HAIR! Actually, I don't think it'd be that bad if it wasn't for the two things sticking up at the top. I think those just look stupid. Also, what is up with those short shorts? Are those the pockets hanging out? I know ripped jeans are "in" right now, but I've never been a fan of them.
See? Not so bad when you cut the top off.
And, finally, just revealed today - the Black and White 2 player characters! So. What is up with that hair? It's like Princess Leia meets Chii form Chobits. But hey! For the first time EVER, she's wearing PANTS! ...Although they're really just leggings under a stupid looking miniskirt, but, you know, baby steps. The closest we've ever gotten to covered legs was with Lyra, although she just had really high knee socks.
To be fair, it's not just the girls who are cursed with bad hair. The male characters definitely have their fair share of weird hair styles and colors. And, with the huge cast of characters between all the games in the franchise (not just the main series games), there are plenty of bizarre hair styles, colors, and outfits from both genders. I just focus on the female player characters the most, since they're "me" when I'm playing. Not that it even really matters, though, because it's not like I'm not still gonna play the game. Pokémon owns my soul. No amount of bizarre hair and clothes can change that.
I mean, I get it, Pokémon is a Japanese video game, so, naturally, it features "anime style" hair, which has a tendency to be insanely ridiculous, both in its color and gravity-defying ways. But, still. I need to rant, because with every new game, I find myself rolling my eyes at the crazy hair (and sometimes outfits) of the female player character (who, of course, I will be playing as). And with the Black and White 2 characters being revealed today, I feel now is the best time for this rant. Because I'm all fired up. (I'm so on top of the world's most important issues.)
We'll start off with the first female player character ever, Kris from Crystal. Yes, it wasn't until the sixth game in the series that they finally realized girls play Pokémon, too. Don't even get me started on that.
She must use a lot of hair spray, because normal hair does not stick straight up like that. Nor is it blue, or green, or turquoise, or whatever that color is supposed to be.
It's definitely blue in the game. I actually think the back sprite looks pretty cute. Looks like pigtails on a windy day.
May's hair is stupid. Short in the back with long, pigtail-like things in the front. Ew. Also, I hate her Emerald outfit redesign. Green and orange? Yuck.
Okay, let's take a break from ranting because LEAF IS WIN. Seriously, I love her. She is by far my favorite player character ever. She's so CUTE! As well as the most normal looking with her hair style, hair color, and outfit. I honestly adore her. I wish I could always play as her.
Leaf spam because I love her.
Dawn is... okay. Her hair is normal-ish. The color is blue, but it's a dark blue, so it doesn't look as weird as Kris. I think the biggest gripe I have with Dawn is HOW SHORT HER SKIRT IS. Isn't she supposed to be like 10?! And then, for Platinum, which takes place in a much colder climate, they add a heavy jacket and bigger scarf, BUT SHE'S STILL WEARING A SKIRT. That has always bugged me. IT'S COLD, PUT SOME PANTS ON.
For HeartGold and SoulSilver, everyone thought they were going to redesign Kris, since the original Gold and Silver games didn't have a female player character, but they surprised everyone by creating Lyra, a brand new character. I for sure prefer Lyra over Kris. I'm actually rather fond of Lyra. She might be my second favorite after Leaf. Her hat is ginormous and her hair sticks out a bit oddly, but at least it's not straight up in the air like Kris.
Her back sprite just looks like cute pigtails. And I've always found her regular sprite to be just adorable.
Hilda (I hate that name) takes us back to the '80s with BIG HAIR! Actually, I don't think it'd be that bad if it wasn't for the two things sticking up at the top. I think those just look stupid. Also, what is up with those short shorts? Are those the pockets hanging out? I know ripped jeans are "in" right now, but I've never been a fan of them.
See? Not so bad when you cut the top off.
And, finally, just revealed today - the Black and White 2 player characters! So. What is up with that hair? It's like Princess Leia meets Chii form Chobits. But hey! For the first time EVER, she's wearing PANTS! ...Although they're really just leggings under a stupid looking miniskirt, but, you know, baby steps. The closest we've ever gotten to covered legs was with Lyra, although she just had really high knee socks.
To be fair, it's not just the girls who are cursed with bad hair. The male characters definitely have their fair share of weird hair styles and colors. And, with the huge cast of characters between all the games in the franchise (not just the main series games), there are plenty of bizarre hair styles, colors, and outfits from both genders. I just focus on the female player characters the most, since they're "me" when I'm playing. Not that it even really matters, though, because it's not like I'm not still gonna play the game. Pokémon owns my soul. No amount of bizarre hair and clothes can change that.