one simple smile
i saw that sign again on my way home yesterday. it's like someone screaming in my ears and slapping me in the face at the same time:
"if you died tonight, where would you spend eternity?"
And always my first thought is, "I wonder if the FedEx guy saw that sign? What was his answer?" But I'll never know. That usually sets the tone for the last half of the drive. Music silently plays on the radio. My mind wanders into the oblivion of headlights.
Not last night though. Last night I smiled for the first time in a long time. In fact I can't even remember the last time i genuinely smiled. so it caught me off guard when it happened. it started in munfordville. i stopped to see travis. but it wasn't travis that started it. it was the stars. the stars in munfordville are astounding. and they're always there. and they're always the same. it's like they were waiting for me. i don't know why i smiled. maybe it's all the memories attached to them. fall retreat. the cow pasture. seven shooting stars. the big white "monster." all those drives. all those star filled nights. it's like the stars and i were reminiscing about all the times we've shared. and for the first time in a long time, i felt a wave of peace wash over me. that must be where the smile came from.
as i drove through the mountain, as i called it the first time i went to visit travis, i laughed to myself. the horrifying woods and hairpin curves. i laugh when i remember how i thought i was going to die when i road with him through those curves.
i leave about an hour later, still smiling. it's nice to feel at home in someone else's house. i like just dropping by. like i'm an old friend. and it does make me feel old. but i keep smiling because i know when we are old, i'll still drop by even if it's just to see his parents. and it will still feel like home.
on my way out of m'ville the smile grows. i remember...
"Dad I'm hungry. Let's stop and eat."
"Well, you take the lead and get off wherever and we'll follow."
I was finally moving to UK. My parents were helping me move. I decided to stop at the subway off exit 65.
"Munfordville - exit 65 off 65. Good little town," dad says.
the irony of it sticking in my head? two years later i returned to that subway. i just stopped by...for lunch with my new best friend.
the subway is the last thing i see on my way out of town.
i'm finally headed home again. the phone rings. florida calling. who? why? Matt. "I'm coming to Owensboro for Thanksgiving!" old scenes play out in my head. smile changes to a grin. i love it when something reminds someone of me and they call just to say so. yeah, maybe i'll drive to owensboro.
i made it home. the smile still played at the corners of my lips. then i found myself in the presence of royalty. and the queen always makes me laugh.
and for the first time in over a month, i went to sleep, still smiling.
"if you died tonight, where would you spend eternity?"
And always my first thought is, "I wonder if the FedEx guy saw that sign? What was his answer?" But I'll never know. That usually sets the tone for the last half of the drive. Music silently plays on the radio. My mind wanders into the oblivion of headlights.
Not last night though. Last night I smiled for the first time in a long time. In fact I can't even remember the last time i genuinely smiled. so it caught me off guard when it happened. it started in munfordville. i stopped to see travis. but it wasn't travis that started it. it was the stars. the stars in munfordville are astounding. and they're always there. and they're always the same. it's like they were waiting for me. i don't know why i smiled. maybe it's all the memories attached to them. fall retreat. the cow pasture. seven shooting stars. the big white "monster." all those drives. all those star filled nights. it's like the stars and i were reminiscing about all the times we've shared. and for the first time in a long time, i felt a wave of peace wash over me. that must be where the smile came from.
as i drove through the mountain, as i called it the first time i went to visit travis, i laughed to myself. the horrifying woods and hairpin curves. i laugh when i remember how i thought i was going to die when i road with him through those curves.
i leave about an hour later, still smiling. it's nice to feel at home in someone else's house. i like just dropping by. like i'm an old friend. and it does make me feel old. but i keep smiling because i know when we are old, i'll still drop by even if it's just to see his parents. and it will still feel like home.
on my way out of m'ville the smile grows. i remember...
"Dad I'm hungry. Let's stop and eat."
"Well, you take the lead and get off wherever and we'll follow."
I was finally moving to UK. My parents were helping me move. I decided to stop at the subway off exit 65.
"Munfordville - exit 65 off 65. Good little town," dad says.
the irony of it sticking in my head? two years later i returned to that subway. i just stopped by...for lunch with my new best friend.
the subway is the last thing i see on my way out of town.
i'm finally headed home again. the phone rings. florida calling. who? why? Matt. "I'm coming to Owensboro for Thanksgiving!" old scenes play out in my head. smile changes to a grin. i love it when something reminds someone of me and they call just to say so. yeah, maybe i'll drive to owensboro.
i made it home. the smile still played at the corners of my lips. then i found myself in the presence of royalty. and the queen always makes me laugh.
and for the first time in over a month, i went to sleep, still smiling.