So this is that other blog...
I miss everything. I miss the back porch, the carport, the Fallon, the apartments, the bar, the office...the list goes on.
It breaks my heart every day when I remember that I am not where I used to be with who I used to be with.
Part of me wants to go back. It's not a homesickness, though. It's a different feeling. It's that I left behind a lot of love, and I absolutely feel that every day. I'm not big on feelings, but that doesn't mean I don't have them. And I feel a lot lately. A lot of sadness, a lot of empty things, a lot of uncertainty, fear, other such negative stuffs.
But none of these feelings are regret, as I am also incredibly happy here, where I am, and with what I am doing and what I am planning to do. Life goes on, it turns out, and one has to go with it.
I just wish that the world revolved around me, so when my life went on, everyone came with me. Because god damnit, that would make this so much easier.
Nobody here calls me Homie G, ya know?
But I am also lucky, because I am here with people that I love. I didn't leave everything behind, and I know that, and I am fucking thrilled about that and about this.
But sometimes it feels like I left too much. Only sometimes, though.
And so long as whatever is back there is alive and well, then I didn't really lose anything.
It breaks my heart every day when I remember that I am not where I used to be with who I used to be with.
Part of me wants to go back. It's not a homesickness, though. It's a different feeling. It's that I left behind a lot of love, and I absolutely feel that every day. I'm not big on feelings, but that doesn't mean I don't have them. And I feel a lot lately. A lot of sadness, a lot of empty things, a lot of uncertainty, fear, other such negative stuffs.
But none of these feelings are regret, as I am also incredibly happy here, where I am, and with what I am doing and what I am planning to do. Life goes on, it turns out, and one has to go with it.
I just wish that the world revolved around me, so when my life went on, everyone came with me. Because god damnit, that would make this so much easier.
Nobody here calls me Homie G, ya know?
But I am also lucky, because I am here with people that I love. I didn't leave everything behind, and I know that, and I am fucking thrilled about that and about this.
But sometimes it feels like I left too much. Only sometimes, though.
And so long as whatever is back there is alive and well, then I didn't really lose anything.