for meredith
NOV 8 [and pretty much how i'm feeling today as well]
I wanted to spend all night writing, but thinking about compiling all the thoughts I've had in my head today into one solid, structured, well articulated piece of writing makes me exhausted. It's hard to say what my mind has been brewing these last couple of days because I've jumped from one irrational conclusion to the next; over-analyzing each little microscopic detail as I go.
I've decided that I'm too aggressive yet not aggressive enough, pretty yet not pretty enough, interesting yet not interesting enough all in just one day, and alas, I've come to the conclusion that I must just be suffering from a case of low self-esteem. I want to be someone who doesn't let lust and/or love (even after all my great discoveries today, I still have yet to conclude which one it actually is) control my life. It's a superhuman quality that I feel I will, unfortunately, never possess. If it's not one thing, rest assured I'll find something else.
Oh Boys!
Oh Love!
Leave me be, I'm only a fragile girl!
I wanted to spend all night writing, but thinking about compiling all the thoughts I've had in my head today into one solid, structured, well articulated piece of writing makes me exhausted. It's hard to say what my mind has been brewing these last couple of days because I've jumped from one irrational conclusion to the next; over-analyzing each little microscopic detail as I go.
I've decided that I'm too aggressive yet not aggressive enough, pretty yet not pretty enough, interesting yet not interesting enough all in just one day, and alas, I've come to the conclusion that I must just be suffering from a case of low self-esteem. I want to be someone who doesn't let lust and/or love (even after all my great discoveries today, I still have yet to conclude which one it actually is) control my life. It's a superhuman quality that I feel I will, unfortunately, never possess. If it's not one thing, rest assured I'll find something else.
Oh Boys!
Oh Love!
Leave me be, I'm only a fragile girl!