(no subject)
i walk downstairs in yesterdays clothes that i wore the day before that, put on my eight year old airwalks that are finally wearing through the sole, lock the door behind me and go for a walk. today was a wonderful game of softball.
got to class 8 minutes late because of construction even though i was going eighty to make sure i made it to class on time from the hospital where i had to leave chrissy because i'd skipped the same class on monday while getting her birthday present. he just shook his head and called me a slacker.
dad called me while i was in class, twice. called him back when i left and he told me that he'd heard from mom that allison had been told by chrissy that she'd gone to the ER that morning. laughed at the perfect circle jerk and asked how grandpa was. dying, cancer's spread to his bones. chrissy calls and she's out of the hospital.
we're in the car after the game and i look at her and want to tell her something and know it's as pure as honesty can get, and i hesitate. i know it's because of all that's happened today, but i feel like i failed her right then and need some time away. hours later she's sleeping and i decide to leave. i put an antique cap gun in my pocket to mask my own insecurities and leave, hoping to find peace.
it's been a shitty day.
got to class 8 minutes late because of construction even though i was going eighty to make sure i made it to class on time from the hospital where i had to leave chrissy because i'd skipped the same class on monday while getting her birthday present. he just shook his head and called me a slacker.
dad called me while i was in class, twice. called him back when i left and he told me that he'd heard from mom that allison had been told by chrissy that she'd gone to the ER that morning. laughed at the perfect circle jerk and asked how grandpa was. dying, cancer's spread to his bones. chrissy calls and she's out of the hospital.
we're in the car after the game and i look at her and want to tell her something and know it's as pure as honesty can get, and i hesitate. i know it's because of all that's happened today, but i feel like i failed her right then and need some time away. hours later she's sleeping and i decide to leave. i put an antique cap gun in my pocket to mask my own insecurities and leave, hoping to find peace.
it's been a shitty day.