(no subject)
I just trimmed my Friends List down a little. Even just a trim is agonizing, because I know some that I dropped will be hurt by my decisions. But what's the point of keeping postvixen Friended? And her alternate journals? The alternate journals are Friends-Only, and the stuff I like reading on the main journal are all locked posts. But obviously, she's not going to turn around and decide to be friends with me as suddenly as she decided not to be. But the ripples of that decision? How far do they spread?
Should I expect the housemates postrodent and lediva to be cold towards me, as well? And if lediva, what about beetiger? What about bard_bloom? Who thinks I'm an asshole, who still thinks I'm confident and charming? Feels sometimes like that balance shifts every day.
More thoughts on this, but I'll button my lip, for now. I'm not quite ready to do my gigantic vent that my Friend Group gets to see and noone else.
I de-Friended some others, as well: mainly people who are interesting but have never bothered to Friend me back. If it ain't a mutual thang, why bother? I'm on Livejournal because I'm interested in connection. You don't want to connect, that's fine; time now to turn away and go elsewhere.
And I know that Neil Gaiman, who is barely aware that his blog has an LJ feed, will be sobbing himself to sleep tonight because I'm no longer his friend. I loved hearing daily chatter from one of my fave authors, but I just won't have time. For the next three months (starting less than 8 full days from now) I will be an Animator and a Photographer's Assistant and Coyote's lover and biker/hiker, and that is all I'll be.
I'm going to mostly be skimming my Friends List, unless I'm procrastinating against some heinous bit of animation that I just don't want to deal with at the moment. In that mood, I'll be reading you carefully and posting. I'll probably still be going to Mirabar every Monday, so local friends can catch me then. Singing is a great release, and singing to an audience (without even having to memorize lyrics!) feeds my thirst for attention, I can't see myself stopping.
There might be elated posts after class: but maybe I'll just go to bed. I bid you a small adieu, Livejournal and the rest of my social life. I'll see you in three months. I have to go build my Owl and Griffin now. If I have extra time this week, maybe you'll see a mini-mood icon set. Maybe not. Time to go, I only have a little while before I leave for Mirabar.
Should I expect the housemates postrodent and lediva to be cold towards me, as well? And if lediva, what about beetiger? What about bard_bloom? Who thinks I'm an asshole, who still thinks I'm confident and charming? Feels sometimes like that balance shifts every day.
More thoughts on this, but I'll button my lip, for now. I'm not quite ready to do my gigantic vent that my Friend Group gets to see and noone else.
I de-Friended some others, as well: mainly people who are interesting but have never bothered to Friend me back. If it ain't a mutual thang, why bother? I'm on Livejournal because I'm interested in connection. You don't want to connect, that's fine; time now to turn away and go elsewhere.
And I know that Neil Gaiman, who is barely aware that his blog has an LJ feed, will be sobbing himself to sleep tonight because I'm no longer his friend. I loved hearing daily chatter from one of my fave authors, but I just won't have time. For the next three months (starting less than 8 full days from now) I will be an Animator and a Photographer's Assistant and Coyote's lover and biker/hiker, and that is all I'll be.
I'm going to mostly be skimming my Friends List, unless I'm procrastinating against some heinous bit of animation that I just don't want to deal with at the moment. In that mood, I'll be reading you carefully and posting. I'll probably still be going to Mirabar every Monday, so local friends can catch me then. Singing is a great release, and singing to an audience (without even having to memorize lyrics!) feeds my thirst for attention, I can't see myself stopping.
There might be elated posts after class: but maybe I'll just go to bed. I bid you a small adieu, Livejournal and the rest of my social life. I'll see you in three months. I have to go build my Owl and Griffin now. If I have extra time this week, maybe you'll see a mini-mood icon set. Maybe not. Time to go, I only have a little while before I leave for Mirabar.