Yankee Swap 2015
I had a really fantastic time at the Underground Canoe Christmas party this year! I think it helps a lot to finish the Yankee Swap and Secret Santa presents a full day beforehand. I was still feverishly working on a present at the eleventh hour, but that was just a CD of music for silentstephi Before that, I was photographing my weavings for posterity and before that, just chilling and packing two pairs of pyjamas (which to wear, which to have on hand if I spilled food or drink on and wanted clean ones to sleep in) and such.
The weavings themselves were off the loom two days before, and the various complicated and frustrating finishing processes done by Friday afternoon. My very first finished woven pieces, yay. They're a bitch and a half to do, though! So finicky, so repetitive. I hope next time, I remember to leave enough length on the bottom to just do some braids, that'd be fun. I kept slipping into the same anxious dream last night, where I was doing endless finishing work on the world's widest weaving. Gah! Glad I'm not planning the next warp until sometime in January.
Anyway, having the pressure off definitely let me relax and enjoy the party itself. I went alone, but definitely not as bummed about that as I usually am- my friends were really warm and supportive, and I may have made a new friend who's the only person I know with Native blood that adores his culture as much as Coyote and I do! I'd love to have a long, meandering talk about it, with him and Coyote and foxglovedt. He warned me that I was gonna get a FB friend request from a long, complicated, weird name. I glanced at his screen and said, "I love Quetzalcoatl! The feathered snake is my favorite creature in the South American Native lore!" He had an amazed grin on his face, that I really knew a thing or two about that culture.
He and I had plenty of time to bond in an empty living room. The five hour Yule log version of Darth Vader burning in the pyre was crackling, and everyone else was crowding the bar. I was drinking in peace and quiet, having brought a bottle of Bombay Sapphire Gin with me from home. To get cold cider, I put mulled cider in a glass in the fridge with some ice- half an hour later, cold enough to drink with a bit of the gin and more ice. It's the perfect winter drink for me, it tastes like being in a spruce forest while someone's setting out applesauce. I am curious about wassail, even though I don't like hot fruit: I'll try some next year. But I am glad to avoid the bar lines and get drinks exactly as weak as I need them. Maybe I'll bring some pear cider or a wine I like next time.
I was already in a comfy seat on the side couch when people came back in for Secret Santa. I'm very glad I finally overcame my butthurt/burnout and participated in Secret Santa again. Everyone was THRILLED with their presents- I think the Baron actually screamed in joy when he unrolled his Ravenclaw tapestry. (I knew the House crests were too complex, but a simple Raven against simple blue and grey stripes that looked like the tops of a castle wall turned out far better than I expected, for only my second-ever tapestry!) At long last, I am the owner of Baldur's Gate: Dark Alliance II!!!! Super thrilling, I may well start it tonight if I'm still not sleepy after I finish this post. I think there was so much Secret Santa joy because everyone shared their wishlists with Melantha. I hope that happens again next year, it's great to see everyone so genuinely pleased with what they got.
Then we exchanged personal gifts, and for once, I was not twiddling my thumbs, watching richer friends give lavish presents to each other while I fought down a lump in my throat and wished desperately for a better creating-ethic. This time, I gave silentstephi her Where's Winter? mix CD and purple-shifted Starry Night socks. She gave me a beautiful necklace she made out of blue and green keychains! It's lovely, I wore it over my pyjamas all night. I can't wait to try it out with a v-necked shirt or dress!
I think she was expecting something more handmade than a mix CD from me. I was all set to make my third weaving a tapestry for her, but I kept second-guessing what to do, and I was afraid of running out of time. The Baron's piece was relatively easy because I only knew what he put on his Etsy wishlist: it's Etsy, so he likes handmade things. And all the items on it were either Minions or Ravenclaw, so, yeah. I know so much about Silentstephi that it's much harder, just as it is to make something for Coyote. I should throw up my hands and give her a certificate for a commission, maybe as a birthday present. Boo, birthday not listed on FB. No wonder I always miss it! I'll have to pester her and put it on my iCal.
Anyway, I was in a pretty damn fantastic mood, with a drink or two in me, when the Yankee Swap started. That's really the key to a great Swap experience: I was thrilled with where I was and who I was hanging out with, there were presents I loved already in my bag and around my neck, and more waiting for me under my wire Christmas tree at home. Whether I ended up with something fantastic or kinda lame, it wouldn't make or break my holiday season.
The best moment was early on. A gay man opened a birdcage! Seemed kinda flimsy, probably not usable for actual birds, just decorative. An old friend who does macabre sculptures of lanterns with chained pixies inside and such got an unexpected turn. Some people were encouraging him to open something new, but he pointed to the birdcage and screamed, "I COULD PUT A BABY IN THERE!" I was sitting next to Silentstephi and couldn't stop myself from leaning over and muttering, "You even have one that'll fit!" and she gave me her I'm-going-to-cut-you smile. :D
I drew a lame number and let a friend-couple cajole me into opening their present- an inflatable ball pit and enough balls to, um, barely cover the floor of it. Gave some squeals of delight at first, but was happy to hand it off to Melantha's husband later- it would've just sat unused in our storage.
Pausing for a second. I am really, really, really fucking sick of people using this Yankee Swap as a means to declutter their home, even though what I took home was definitely another yard sale-ish item and I love it. I worked for something like 15 hours to create the soft tapestry I made, and I'm sure the other art-pieces or commission-certificates were/will be similar amounts of effort. We artists can do that. The rest of you, make certificates for Skype cooking lessons or other cool things you can do over Skype or otherwise online/through the mail. Or, BUY A DAMN PRESENT! $20 goes far at your local thrift shop, or hell, a gift card to prominent national chains or Etsy would go over well.
Instead, we got lame ball pits, "vagina bears" regifted from a few Yankee Swaps ago, a lot of other meh stuff, and THREE packs of Jamberry, the plastic nail coatings which absolutely nobody was enthused about. I'm guessing that everybody knows at least two women who sell Jamberry, and to be supportive of their friends, they buy a pack and then have to give it away ASAP. Ugh, I'm just glad I wasn't stuck with one!
I did in fact get to pick a present late in the game, but as per usual, a lot of the people with the cooler presents had wandered away by then. The one I wish had still been there was the one who got a pirate pack- skull-printed kerchief, mowhawked hat, and earrings. But I like my dusty classic Bela Lugosi-type vampire mug. I might store brushes in it, once I carve out space on my Toy Room shelves. Or just display it. It also came with a small stuffed scary clown, which is okay, but I won't at all mind giving it away to someone who's more inclined to love scary clowns in general. (Me, I'm just stuck on my boy Pennywise.) I'll put a pic of it on FB and see if anyone's interested.
As for my present, well. I have one desire when it comes to Yankee Swaps: I want the art that I donate to be fought over, to be traded hands at least once. I've gotten pleased reactions from a few people who've opened mine, but nobody ever took them off their hands. Not like one artist friend, who promised a character-art commission that sparked giant wars for the entire game. He did so again, and again was fiercely fought over. Another artist also offered a general art commission that, though it was only unveiled a few turns from the end, still changed hands at least once.
I'd made a piece of abstract art, a touchable tapestry in soft fluffy rya with cool shapes and colors. Red, white, black, blue, aquamarine. I thought the Captain America fans might like it, and others too. My heart sped up when the wrapped cylinder was picked up by a friend who would've loved to own a piece of mine- but he put it down and unwrapped something else. Instead, the person in the room I liked the least unwrapped it, declared that it looked like the American flag (not a star or stripe on it, but okay, whatever) and that she was allergic to it.
I tried to keep my face fairly neutral while the schadenfreude made me laugh and laugh internally.
Well, the allergy meant she barely touched it, so only held it up to offer it to be stolen once or twice. I'm still a little sad nobody adored it enough to remember it and steal it, but so it goes. She drew the number one, so she picked who would be, in her words, "stuck with it". More cruel laughter in my head. This was exactly the worst situation imaginable, the polar opposite of having my artwork traded multiple times- and yet, I was genuinely still happy. Maybe I was just glad not to be that miserable cunt?
And then she swapped it, and the person who was "stuck with it" was my new Native-blooded friend. He didn't seem unhappy in the least, though I guess we'll see if he genuinely likes it. Will he bring it back like he brought back the vagina bears? Time will tell!
My friend who did that hotly-swapped commission (twice) talked to me later, and had this reply to my envy. He told me that they were fighting over it so fiercely because they're imagining the perfect image in their mind, rather than the flawful completed image that would come, some weeks or months later. That is a point, and yes, I could offer a general commission like the other artist did- but would I want to? I'm really relishing the fact that I have very little on my plate now, and absolutely nothing pressing after Friday.
The rest of the party was a fine flow of conversation and laughter. I don't remember many specifics, but there was some great stuff in the kitchen at 3am with my old sculptor friend The Emperor, a young artist, and The Baron. Oh yes, and I got to see Melantha drunk for like the second time ever! She was truly wasted, she had to go up the basement stairs on her hands and knees. A few hours earlier, I played in the ball pit with the sole child at the party (the others were being babysat by Mel's daughter at Silentstephi's house). I remember Silentstephi asking if I was having fun, and I grinned up at her. "I'm drunk in a ball pit, what do you think?" Luckily, the nearby child was a reenactor child, as devoid of innocence or judgement as any faire child or burner child or other deviants' child.
I slept fitfully, that neverending weaving-finishing haunting me, but bless the children for staying downstairs so I could sleep six full hours. Breakfast was delicious, well worth the oven-fire it caused: Scotch egg pie! It's just tube-sausage meat mixed with hardboiled eggs and inside premade pie crust. Enjoyable conversations as I lingered for awhile. I came home, had a hot bath and a long nap, then puttered around the internet and hung out with Coyote when he finally came home. Tiger visits tomorrow, if he likes the scary clown, maybe it'll go in his stocking. For now, a snack (that one piece of Scotch egg pie kept me full until nearly 9pm!) and perhaps some Dark Alliance II. Holy shit, I can't believe I finally have it! I have to remove it from like six different wishlists now.
The weavings themselves were off the loom two days before, and the various complicated and frustrating finishing processes done by Friday afternoon. My very first finished woven pieces, yay. They're a bitch and a half to do, though! So finicky, so repetitive. I hope next time, I remember to leave enough length on the bottom to just do some braids, that'd be fun. I kept slipping into the same anxious dream last night, where I was doing endless finishing work on the world's widest weaving. Gah! Glad I'm not planning the next warp until sometime in January.
Anyway, having the pressure off definitely let me relax and enjoy the party itself. I went alone, but definitely not as bummed about that as I usually am- my friends were really warm and supportive, and I may have made a new friend who's the only person I know with Native blood that adores his culture as much as Coyote and I do! I'd love to have a long, meandering talk about it, with him and Coyote and foxglovedt. He warned me that I was gonna get a FB friend request from a long, complicated, weird name. I glanced at his screen and said, "I love Quetzalcoatl! The feathered snake is my favorite creature in the South American Native lore!" He had an amazed grin on his face, that I really knew a thing or two about that culture.
He and I had plenty of time to bond in an empty living room. The five hour Yule log version of Darth Vader burning in the pyre was crackling, and everyone else was crowding the bar. I was drinking in peace and quiet, having brought a bottle of Bombay Sapphire Gin with me from home. To get cold cider, I put mulled cider in a glass in the fridge with some ice- half an hour later, cold enough to drink with a bit of the gin and more ice. It's the perfect winter drink for me, it tastes like being in a spruce forest while someone's setting out applesauce. I am curious about wassail, even though I don't like hot fruit: I'll try some next year. But I am glad to avoid the bar lines and get drinks exactly as weak as I need them. Maybe I'll bring some pear cider or a wine I like next time.
I was already in a comfy seat on the side couch when people came back in for Secret Santa. I'm very glad I finally overcame my butthurt/burnout and participated in Secret Santa again. Everyone was THRILLED with their presents- I think the Baron actually screamed in joy when he unrolled his Ravenclaw tapestry. (I knew the House crests were too complex, but a simple Raven against simple blue and grey stripes that looked like the tops of a castle wall turned out far better than I expected, for only my second-ever tapestry!) At long last, I am the owner of Baldur's Gate: Dark Alliance II!!!! Super thrilling, I may well start it tonight if I'm still not sleepy after I finish this post. I think there was so much Secret Santa joy because everyone shared their wishlists with Melantha. I hope that happens again next year, it's great to see everyone so genuinely pleased with what they got.
Then we exchanged personal gifts, and for once, I was not twiddling my thumbs, watching richer friends give lavish presents to each other while I fought down a lump in my throat and wished desperately for a better creating-ethic. This time, I gave silentstephi her Where's Winter? mix CD and purple-shifted Starry Night socks. She gave me a beautiful necklace she made out of blue and green keychains! It's lovely, I wore it over my pyjamas all night. I can't wait to try it out with a v-necked shirt or dress!
I think she was expecting something more handmade than a mix CD from me. I was all set to make my third weaving a tapestry for her, but I kept second-guessing what to do, and I was afraid of running out of time. The Baron's piece was relatively easy because I only knew what he put on his Etsy wishlist: it's Etsy, so he likes handmade things. And all the items on it were either Minions or Ravenclaw, so, yeah. I know so much about Silentstephi that it's much harder, just as it is to make something for Coyote. I should throw up my hands and give her a certificate for a commission, maybe as a birthday present. Boo, birthday not listed on FB. No wonder I always miss it! I'll have to pester her and put it on my iCal.
Anyway, I was in a pretty damn fantastic mood, with a drink or two in me, when the Yankee Swap started. That's really the key to a great Swap experience: I was thrilled with where I was and who I was hanging out with, there were presents I loved already in my bag and around my neck, and more waiting for me under my wire Christmas tree at home. Whether I ended up with something fantastic or kinda lame, it wouldn't make or break my holiday season.
The best moment was early on. A gay man opened a birdcage! Seemed kinda flimsy, probably not usable for actual birds, just decorative. An old friend who does macabre sculptures of lanterns with chained pixies inside and such got an unexpected turn. Some people were encouraging him to open something new, but he pointed to the birdcage and screamed, "I COULD PUT A BABY IN THERE!" I was sitting next to Silentstephi and couldn't stop myself from leaning over and muttering, "You even have one that'll fit!" and she gave me her I'm-going-to-cut-you smile. :D
I drew a lame number and let a friend-couple cajole me into opening their present- an inflatable ball pit and enough balls to, um, barely cover the floor of it. Gave some squeals of delight at first, but was happy to hand it off to Melantha's husband later- it would've just sat unused in our storage.
Pausing for a second. I am really, really, really fucking sick of people using this Yankee Swap as a means to declutter their home, even though what I took home was definitely another yard sale-ish item and I love it. I worked for something like 15 hours to create the soft tapestry I made, and I'm sure the other art-pieces or commission-certificates were/will be similar amounts of effort. We artists can do that. The rest of you, make certificates for Skype cooking lessons or other cool things you can do over Skype or otherwise online/through the mail. Or, BUY A DAMN PRESENT! $20 goes far at your local thrift shop, or hell, a gift card to prominent national chains or Etsy would go over well.
Instead, we got lame ball pits, "vagina bears" regifted from a few Yankee Swaps ago, a lot of other meh stuff, and THREE packs of Jamberry, the plastic nail coatings which absolutely nobody was enthused about. I'm guessing that everybody knows at least two women who sell Jamberry, and to be supportive of their friends, they buy a pack and then have to give it away ASAP. Ugh, I'm just glad I wasn't stuck with one!
I did in fact get to pick a present late in the game, but as per usual, a lot of the people with the cooler presents had wandered away by then. The one I wish had still been there was the one who got a pirate pack- skull-printed kerchief, mowhawked hat, and earrings. But I like my dusty classic Bela Lugosi-type vampire mug. I might store brushes in it, once I carve out space on my Toy Room shelves. Or just display it. It also came with a small stuffed scary clown, which is okay, but I won't at all mind giving it away to someone who's more inclined to love scary clowns in general. (Me, I'm just stuck on my boy Pennywise.) I'll put a pic of it on FB and see if anyone's interested.
As for my present, well. I have one desire when it comes to Yankee Swaps: I want the art that I donate to be fought over, to be traded hands at least once. I've gotten pleased reactions from a few people who've opened mine, but nobody ever took them off their hands. Not like one artist friend, who promised a character-art commission that sparked giant wars for the entire game. He did so again, and again was fiercely fought over. Another artist also offered a general art commission that, though it was only unveiled a few turns from the end, still changed hands at least once.
I'd made a piece of abstract art, a touchable tapestry in soft fluffy rya with cool shapes and colors. Red, white, black, blue, aquamarine. I thought the Captain America fans might like it, and others too. My heart sped up when the wrapped cylinder was picked up by a friend who would've loved to own a piece of mine- but he put it down and unwrapped something else. Instead, the person in the room I liked the least unwrapped it, declared that it looked like the American flag (not a star or stripe on it, but okay, whatever) and that she was allergic to it.
I tried to keep my face fairly neutral while the schadenfreude made me laugh and laugh internally.
Well, the allergy meant she barely touched it, so only held it up to offer it to be stolen once or twice. I'm still a little sad nobody adored it enough to remember it and steal it, but so it goes. She drew the number one, so she picked who would be, in her words, "stuck with it". More cruel laughter in my head. This was exactly the worst situation imaginable, the polar opposite of having my artwork traded multiple times- and yet, I was genuinely still happy. Maybe I was just glad not to be that miserable cunt?
And then she swapped it, and the person who was "stuck with it" was my new Native-blooded friend. He didn't seem unhappy in the least, though I guess we'll see if he genuinely likes it. Will he bring it back like he brought back the vagina bears? Time will tell!
My friend who did that hotly-swapped commission (twice) talked to me later, and had this reply to my envy. He told me that they were fighting over it so fiercely because they're imagining the perfect image in their mind, rather than the flawful completed image that would come, some weeks or months later. That is a point, and yes, I could offer a general commission like the other artist did- but would I want to? I'm really relishing the fact that I have very little on my plate now, and absolutely nothing pressing after Friday.
The rest of the party was a fine flow of conversation and laughter. I don't remember many specifics, but there was some great stuff in the kitchen at 3am with my old sculptor friend The Emperor, a young artist, and The Baron. Oh yes, and I got to see Melantha drunk for like the second time ever! She was truly wasted, she had to go up the basement stairs on her hands and knees. A few hours earlier, I played in the ball pit with the sole child at the party (the others were being babysat by Mel's daughter at Silentstephi's house). I remember Silentstephi asking if I was having fun, and I grinned up at her. "I'm drunk in a ball pit, what do you think?" Luckily, the nearby child was a reenactor child, as devoid of innocence or judgement as any faire child or burner child or other deviants' child.
I slept fitfully, that neverending weaving-finishing haunting me, but bless the children for staying downstairs so I could sleep six full hours. Breakfast was delicious, well worth the oven-fire it caused: Scotch egg pie! It's just tube-sausage meat mixed with hardboiled eggs and inside premade pie crust. Enjoyable conversations as I lingered for awhile. I came home, had a hot bath and a long nap, then puttered around the internet and hung out with Coyote when he finally came home. Tiger visits tomorrow, if he likes the scary clown, maybe it'll go in his stocking. For now, a snack (that one piece of Scotch egg pie kept me full until nearly 9pm!) and perhaps some Dark Alliance II. Holy shit, I can't believe I finally have it! I have to remove it from like six different wishlists now.