Mandatory Updates, a Transformers G1 ficlet
Title: Mandatory Updates
Universe: G1, pre-TF:TM
Rating: G
Characters: First Aid, Kup
Warnings: grumpy Kup
Prompt: Update.
Notes: written for the May 7, 2011 round of tf_speedwriting.
“Now, you might feel some disorientation as the program uploads. I recommend sitting down for the duration of the transfer.” First Aid patted his patient on the shoulder companionably as he started transferring the anti-virus program.
“I’ll be fine,” Kup grumped. “Not like there’s going to be much to update anyway. Decepticons haven’t had time to write a decent virus for longer than anybot’s been on Earth.”
“Perhaps, but the updates are still mandatory.” The young medic’s optics watched the transfer readout carefully, hoping that Kup would be free of the glitches that some of the other Cybertronian based Autobots had suffered when they received these updates. “Besides, you aren’t being updated for Cybertronian based viral programs. You’re being updated for Earth based programs.”
Kup stiffened and turned to glare at First Aid. “What could the Humans possibly code that would be able to give us problems?”
“Blades had a virus that caused him to see a small rodent in a tutu dancing to a terrible song that overloaded his audio receptors. It took Ratchet and Perceptor almost four days to write a code to delete it.” The younger mech paused the upload for a moment. “Really, sir, I must insist that you sit down. You upload has reached the point where all of your teammates experienced balance problems and Springer reported quite a bit of vertigo as well. I think it would be for the best.”
“Fine.” The older mech flopped down onto a medical berth and crossed his arms. “There, I’m sitting. Let’s get this finished.”
“Thank you.” First Aid resumed the upload.
“And what the slag is a tutu anyway?”