let shit roll out
School starts soon. Again. It seems every year I get the same feeling around this time. I'm not sure if something triggers it or if it's just a natural thing. It's always fun to look back on the year and see what has changed, but the honest truth of the matter is that nothing has. Everything is pretty much the same as it was last year, which is not a bad thing. It's actually more of a relief.
I really don't know where this post is going. I'm kind of regretting starting it, but I'm not giving up at this point.
A not quite perfect circle:
A lot of things are coming to an end this year, as far as video games and music (the two passions of my life) go.
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On September 16th, The Arrogant Sons of Bitches are playing their last show EVER (we've all heard that one before (but it's for realz this time)). The one band I could always relate with to pretty much, all of their songs, and I know how lame that sounds, but it's the honest truth. I'll miss going to their shows A LOT, but Jeff is doing a lot with Bomb the Music Industry! which is also an amazing band, and a lot like ASOB.
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On September 18th, I will turn 17. Rated "R" movies are no longer a problem.
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On September 25th the Halo trilogy comes full circle as well. Yes, as much as I hate to admit it, I love these games, and I can't wait to "finish the fight" on that date. I know that I shouldn't be playing these games, and should try to socialize more, and perhaps meet a girl. Things just never seem to work out with me and chix for some reason. Is it my fault, or theirs? It's probably about 50/50.
Is it a self-fulfilling prophecy that I'll always be alone?
It's not that obvious that I'm an extreamly picky person. I like you, you don't like me back. You like me, I don't like you back. It can never just be the opposite. I'm not making it easier for myself though. I've come to realize that I'm only ever attracted to older women, and when I say that, don't get the wrong idea. I'm saying about one, maybe two years older. If someone is younger than me, by at least a year or more, it's an instant turn off. I've always been that way. I don't know why, but it's something I've come to realize, and accept. However, accepting the fact that there are very few women out there that are attracted to me, and older than 17, is not easy to choke down.
I've decided to just stop talking to girls*. If they have interest, or care about creating any kind of substantial relationship, albeit, friendship or something more, then they will come to me. I'm through with burdening women with my presence.
*Doing this can make you a very, very, VERY (capital letters and repetition, for emphasis) lonely.
You can get a decent wage, I still can't find a job.
This has been a real pain in the ass. My mom decided she doesn't want to give me money anymore (I can hardly blame her) and it's making it really hard to function in life. I want to start collecting Vinyl, and buy more video games, and buy more instruments. BUY!BUY!BUY!
I mean, the truth of the matter is, I don't need these things, and I'm pretty content with what I have now. All I'm saying is, it would be nice to have some cash in my pocket, so I could pick up some sweet stuff.
Why do I always put so much effort into these updates? I guess it leaves me feeling a little more satisfyed that I put effort into something. It'll make me more satisfyed if you actually read this crapola. Chances are, I'm going to forget something, and edit it a little later when I remember. Whatever Y'all. Defend Brooklyn.
-Eric