that strange weight in the chest area diagnosis:

[edieandandy]

well it feels like its weighing me down to the ground but upon further investigation it seems to be making me lighter than air, giving the strong desire to blow away with the wind. like a free radical to soar and sink above it all, but then one remembers one's own humanity and falls like a rock to the ground, sinking beneath in the earth's motherly embrace. for we are all made of a faulty material, one cannot go on living life as callous or uncaring, there are some things from which there is no running away, and these cause emotions that grip you like a vice. then you sit down with your 7th drink and ponder it all, it is only from this perspective, within your brain's struggling efforts to keep your heart beating and motor senses running, it is then that it all makes sense, you file it away in your cabinet and are at peace. and you fly away into the beautiful dark sky of dreams and forgetting.

morning brings the fall back: to earth, to cycles upon cycles of repeated history, to the faulty material of the brain, to old and new obsessions, to an empty heart.