not as great as it seems...
Tax free day is a very dangerous day. Sure, it may seem like "Woahmg, s'tax free! That means thigns are cheaper!!" This is untrue. Anti truth. Dis trust. Bad good. What you save in actual dollars and cents, you pay for IN BLOOD. People are fucking crazy when it comes to shopping, especially women. I could go on a long, stand up comic rant on how guys know what they want, get it and leave....and how women spend more time then men shopping, and how humorous the more time spent is....but i dont have the attention span to d-Hey a blue car!
Anyway, i did go shopping today. At the mall, of all places. I didnt actually buy anything, but just being there was enough to put me off shopping for a while. As soon as i walked in, i saw giant masses of people...engulfing smaller people in order to become bigger, eviler blobs of people. No where was this more apparent than in the food court. On normal days, the free sample guy would be standing there and occasionaly hand out samples. Today, he didnt have a chance. Crazy, fat bitches swarmed him and ate everything in sight, and part of his hand. Then they ripped off his arm and started eating his body. If you werent behind a counter, you were considered a free sample. People were eating the floor and chairs and tables. A large black woman ATE A BABY. THE BABY IS NOW DEAD, PROBABLY. Crazy, i know.
And i thought crazy fat people were the worst of it. The actal shops, that sold clothes to people who could fit inside them, contained the worst. The healthy, dangerous soccer moms. Much more agile than the fat bitches. And with an agenda....schools coming up and everyone in their way is trying to stop them from getting school clothes. Like me. Im sitting there, minding my own business when one of them bumps into me. She flips out and starts yelling at me, how i should be more careful...and how her son played and won soccer, the entire sport. I wasnt havin none of that, so i punched her heart out and Hogan body slammed her through her kid.
And then i tried to go to the bathroom. There was a giant line of women waiting to get into the womens restroom, because women have complex genitallia that makes pissing retardly complicated..apparently. The guys bathroom was normal, everyone obeying the code and what not...until some lady walked in...saying something about how the womens line is long. Of course its long bitch, just because you cant piss normal doesnt mean you can take up our manly bathroom space. So i organized a gang rape. A little problem getting the union organized...but that was settled with a stronger dental plan.
And whats the deal with airline food?!
*no offense intended towards teh ladies. Im sure your all not crazy*
** I know that im going to have to go actually clothes shopping sometime...i just hope i can get through it. Supposedly im getting help with it, but it might not be enough.**
Ok, so i decided to make another entry. BUT! That, most deffinatly was the last one. I promise.
Anyway, i did go shopping today. At the mall, of all places. I didnt actually buy anything, but just being there was enough to put me off shopping for a while. As soon as i walked in, i saw giant masses of people...engulfing smaller people in order to become bigger, eviler blobs of people. No where was this more apparent than in the food court. On normal days, the free sample guy would be standing there and occasionaly hand out samples. Today, he didnt have a chance. Crazy, fat bitches swarmed him and ate everything in sight, and part of his hand. Then they ripped off his arm and started eating his body. If you werent behind a counter, you were considered a free sample. People were eating the floor and chairs and tables. A large black woman ATE A BABY. THE BABY IS NOW DEAD, PROBABLY. Crazy, i know.
And i thought crazy fat people were the worst of it. The actal shops, that sold clothes to people who could fit inside them, contained the worst. The healthy, dangerous soccer moms. Much more agile than the fat bitches. And with an agenda....schools coming up and everyone in their way is trying to stop them from getting school clothes. Like me. Im sitting there, minding my own business when one of them bumps into me. She flips out and starts yelling at me, how i should be more careful...and how her son played and won soccer, the entire sport. I wasnt havin none of that, so i punched her heart out and Hogan body slammed her through her kid.
And then i tried to go to the bathroom. There was a giant line of women waiting to get into the womens restroom, because women have complex genitallia that makes pissing retardly complicated..apparently. The guys bathroom was normal, everyone obeying the code and what not...until some lady walked in...saying something about how the womens line is long. Of course its long bitch, just because you cant piss normal doesnt mean you can take up our manly bathroom space. So i organized a gang rape. A little problem getting the union organized...but that was settled with a stronger dental plan.
And whats the deal with airline food?!
*no offense intended towards teh ladies. Im sure your all not crazy*
** I know that im going to have to go actually clothes shopping sometime...i just hope i can get through it. Supposedly im getting help with it, but it might not be enough.**
Ok, so i decided to make another entry. BUT! That, most deffinatly was the last one. I promise.