(no subject)
I fell in love with a bad, bad man
ever since then I've been sad, sad.
I am starting a new obsession with CocoRosie. Really like the majority of their shit.
Does everyone hate working as much as I do? I absolutely dread working right up until I have to go do it, and then I just kind of go through the motions. I am so turned off by everything about where I work. I really don't want to work there anymore. The money is good but I think I would rather work somewhere where I make less and have more time to be a student/eighteen year old. I would love to have a semester where I don't have to work at all but thats ridiculously unlikely. Not to mention the fact that I have school r work every day of the week. It's stressful. It's tiring. I don't want to do this anymore. I need to buy a car and then I can quit. I think I might be able to last for one more wedding season and that is it. I'm not being retarded I know I NEED a job, but I don't want this one anymore. I hate it.
In other news, I wish I was off at some college right now. Anywhere has to be better than here. I just want to be my age. I want to go to school, sleep in a dorm, eat shitty cafeteria food and have no responsibility other than going to class everyday. I don't want to be an adult yet. I feel more and more everyday that I totally cheated myself by not even applying to any schools. Self-sabotage at it's very best.
I don't want to smoke so much weed anymore. It's expensive and I'm bored of smoking weed to the point where I become completely complacent and don't ever do anything. I want to enjoy what I can and live as much as possible, however small Healdsburg is.
I need change. This isn't where I'm supposed to be.
ever since then I've been sad, sad.
I am starting a new obsession with CocoRosie. Really like the majority of their shit.
Does everyone hate working as much as I do? I absolutely dread working right up until I have to go do it, and then I just kind of go through the motions. I am so turned off by everything about where I work. I really don't want to work there anymore. The money is good but I think I would rather work somewhere where I make less and have more time to be a student/eighteen year old. I would love to have a semester where I don't have to work at all but thats ridiculously unlikely. Not to mention the fact that I have school r work every day of the week. It's stressful. It's tiring. I don't want to do this anymore. I need to buy a car and then I can quit. I think I might be able to last for one more wedding season and that is it. I'm not being retarded I know I NEED a job, but I don't want this one anymore. I hate it.
In other news, I wish I was off at some college right now. Anywhere has to be better than here. I just want to be my age. I want to go to school, sleep in a dorm, eat shitty cafeteria food and have no responsibility other than going to class everyday. I don't want to be an adult yet. I feel more and more everyday that I totally cheated myself by not even applying to any schools. Self-sabotage at it's very best.
I don't want to smoke so much weed anymore. It's expensive and I'm bored of smoking weed to the point where I become completely complacent and don't ever do anything. I want to enjoy what I can and live as much as possible, however small Healdsburg is.
I need change. This isn't where I'm supposed to be.