[Fic] "Let the Water Take Me" -- Homestuck
Today is Ladypalooza reveal day! I wrote two fics this year: my assignment and a pinch hit. I will talk about each in a separate post.
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Let the Water Take Me: You've known since you were a wiggler that one night Meenah Peixes will set you free. You've known for almost as long that your death will only draw her further into the trap of your Master's schemes. And it only took one sweep in your Master's active service before it occurred to you that she is the only other troll in the universe who will live as long as you, with all the loneliness and loss that implies. It would take a far stronger person than you will ever be to not love and pity her a little, if only in the abstract. (You will destroy her anyway.) Handmaid/Condesce, depression, suicidal ideation, attempted suicide. [2,450 words]
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This is a pinch hit, written for
Burgundyrose!
The prompt was for a version of Handmaid/Condesce that leaned toward red- or palerom rather than blackrom, which I leapt at because I'd been wanting to write something along those lines for a while but didn't have any framework for such a story. Burgundyrose's suggestion of a scene where the young Handmaid tries to drown herself, only to be interrupted by the Condesce, immediately gave me ideas. :D
I've always liked this ship, and while my first impulse in 2012 was to categorize it as a kismessisitude gone wrong (one of them kills the other), I later rethought my stance and decided the Handmaid would be much more likely to hate the Dolorosa, the Signless, the Disciple, or the Summoner. See, what would piss her off most is hope, since she knows in her bones how futile it is to expect any change to the system she's helped build at Lord English and Doc Scratch's orders. And by the time the Condesce is an adult, I think she shares that fatalistic, nothing-changes worldview. She comes at it from a different direction -- her core assumption is that she's always going to win and always be in charge -- but that can easily get wearing and pointless in its own way. She and the Handmaid also share an assessment of other trolls as toys/game-pieces.
And when you come down to it, after all, the Handmaid wants to die. She makes a genuine suicide threat to Doc Scratch as a child, and I can't think eternity in Lord English's service was any kind of pleasure. The Condesce, in effect, frees her by killing her.
"Let the Water Take Me" is a small exercise in radically divergent character perspective. For Meenah, it's almost a meet-cute (aside from, you know, the 'I rescued you from attempted suicide' thing), whereas for Damara, it's several small tragedies bound together because she knows exactly how their story is going to end, hates what that's going to do to Meenah, hates herself for looking forward to it, and would probably go through with that final assisted suicide attempt even if she did think she could change the outcome, because she wants her freedom more than she wants to save Meenah from Lord English's service. (And she hates herself for that, too.)
I used the characters' Beforan names for simplicity's sake, because Meenah at this point in her life is too young for an adult title (and might have used a different one at first anyway).
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comments)
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Let the Water Take Me: You've known since you were a wiggler that one night Meenah Peixes will set you free. You've known for almost as long that your death will only draw her further into the trap of your Master's schemes. And it only took one sweep in your Master's active service before it occurred to you that she is the only other troll in the universe who will live as long as you, with all the loneliness and loss that implies. It would take a far stronger person than you will ever be to not love and pity her a little, if only in the abstract. (You will destroy her anyway.) Handmaid/Condesce, depression, suicidal ideation, attempted suicide. [2,450 words]
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This is a pinch hit, written for
Burgundyrose!
The prompt was for a version of Handmaid/Condesce that leaned toward red- or palerom rather than blackrom, which I leapt at because I'd been wanting to write something along those lines for a while but didn't have any framework for such a story. Burgundyrose's suggestion of a scene where the young Handmaid tries to drown herself, only to be interrupted by the Condesce, immediately gave me ideas. :D
I've always liked this ship, and while my first impulse in 2012 was to categorize it as a kismessisitude gone wrong (one of them kills the other), I later rethought my stance and decided the Handmaid would be much more likely to hate the Dolorosa, the Signless, the Disciple, or the Summoner. See, what would piss her off most is hope, since she knows in her bones how futile it is to expect any change to the system she's helped build at Lord English and Doc Scratch's orders. And by the time the Condesce is an adult, I think she shares that fatalistic, nothing-changes worldview. She comes at it from a different direction -- her core assumption is that she's always going to win and always be in charge -- but that can easily get wearing and pointless in its own way. She and the Handmaid also share an assessment of other trolls as toys/game-pieces.
And when you come down to it, after all, the Handmaid wants to die. She makes a genuine suicide threat to Doc Scratch as a child, and I can't think eternity in Lord English's service was any kind of pleasure. The Condesce, in effect, frees her by killing her.
"Let the Water Take Me" is a small exercise in radically divergent character perspective. For Meenah, it's almost a meet-cute (aside from, you know, the 'I rescued you from attempted suicide' thing), whereas for Damara, it's several small tragedies bound together because she knows exactly how their story is going to end, hates what that's going to do to Meenah, hates herself for looking forward to it, and would probably go through with that final assisted suicide attempt even if she did think she could change the outcome, because she wants her freedom more than she wants to save Meenah from Lord English's service. (And she hates herself for that, too.)
I used the characters' Beforan names for simplicity's sake, because Meenah at this point in her life is too young for an adult title (and might have used a different one at first anyway).
You can also read this entry on Dreamwidth, where there are currently (
comments)