bad dreams and general blargh
I slept very badly Monday night -- probably free-floating stress about, I dunno, college and bus schedules and work and general uncertainty about the future. I kept having extremely upsetting dreams, which I'd wake from sweating and emotionally wrung out and then have trouble getting back to sleep.
By "upsetting dreams" I mean things like the following:
1. A dream in which a refugee people fled one civil war only to walk right into another civil war and then accidentally start a third war when they tried to settle in a third country, and the families I was sort of following through this narrative kept losing members in horribly gruesome ways. Also there was a drought and famine. I woke up just as a group of soldiers with boar spears were advancing on the few surviving refugees in the middle of their ruined farm.
2. A dream in which a ship of people went on a mission to establish a new trading route across an ocean, only there was an ecological disaster and all the water turned to acid poison and their ship was slowly being eaten away from underneath them, so they sailed north as fast as they could and ran aground on an iceberg as their ship dissolved, but of course the iceberg was also made of acid poison and now they were menaced by mutant polar bears and leopard seals, and the iceberg was slowly tipping sideways...
3. A dream in which a person had been caught in an emotionally abusive relationship after fleeing from their emotionally abusive birth family, and finally worked up the strength to get out. This required smashing a ceramic bowl that was a magical symbol of their commitment to their abusive partner, and they kept throwing the bowl on the ground but it wouldn't break, and then the abusive partner came home and starting trying to turn the situation around and make the protagonist out to be the real abuser.
So, you know, upsetting.
Anyway, on Tuesday evening I had my scholarship program orientation session, which went pretty well. The bus schedules were just as inconvenient as I'd expected, which meant I ended up sitting around in a lounge for 75 minutes after the orientation, waiting for the next bus home. Ugh.
I slept somewhat badly again Tuesday night, though at least that time it was just restless sleep rather than bad dreams, and work was busy again today (all the students have return to town for the spring semester, which means approximately seven thousand packages and various sublet move-ins), so I am still feeling kind of fried.
But I've arranged calls with Cat and Susan for the weekend, my to-do lists look manageable, and I have tomorrow off work from both my jobs. The plan is to go to bed early, sleep in late, and then pretend I am a productive adult until I get caught up on some stuff I've let slide these past few days. We'll see how it goes. :)
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By "upsetting dreams" I mean things like the following:
1. A dream in which a refugee people fled one civil war only to walk right into another civil war and then accidentally start a third war when they tried to settle in a third country, and the families I was sort of following through this narrative kept losing members in horribly gruesome ways. Also there was a drought and famine. I woke up just as a group of soldiers with boar spears were advancing on the few surviving refugees in the middle of their ruined farm.
2. A dream in which a ship of people went on a mission to establish a new trading route across an ocean, only there was an ecological disaster and all the water turned to acid poison and their ship was slowly being eaten away from underneath them, so they sailed north as fast as they could and ran aground on an iceberg as their ship dissolved, but of course the iceberg was also made of acid poison and now they were menaced by mutant polar bears and leopard seals, and the iceberg was slowly tipping sideways...
3. A dream in which a person had been caught in an emotionally abusive relationship after fleeing from their emotionally abusive birth family, and finally worked up the strength to get out. This required smashing a ceramic bowl that was a magical symbol of their commitment to their abusive partner, and they kept throwing the bowl on the ground but it wouldn't break, and then the abusive partner came home and starting trying to turn the situation around and make the protagonist out to be the real abuser.
So, you know, upsetting.
Anyway, on Tuesday evening I had my scholarship program orientation session, which went pretty well. The bus schedules were just as inconvenient as I'd expected, which meant I ended up sitting around in a lounge for 75 minutes after the orientation, waiting for the next bus home. Ugh.
I slept somewhat badly again Tuesday night, though at least that time it was just restless sleep rather than bad dreams, and work was busy again today (all the students have return to town for the spring semester, which means approximately seven thousand packages and various sublet move-ins), so I am still feeling kind of fried.
But I've arranged calls with Cat and Susan for the weekend, my to-do lists look manageable, and I have tomorrow off work from both my jobs. The plan is to go to bed early, sleep in late, and then pretend I am a productive adult until I get caught up on some stuff I've let slide these past few days. We'll see how it goes. :)
If you want to comment on this post, you can do so over here on Dreamwidth, where there are currently (
comments)