RH: Diversion
Fandom: Robin Hood (BBC)
Pairing: Allan/Will
Warnings: Crack
Rating: PG
Summary: Diversions have never been so interesting. For over_look.
"Why can't Djaq do this? Or Marian? Or... anyone?"
"A lot of reasons, starting with the fact that a pregnant woman isn't much of a diversion!"
Allan stares at Robin, in that you-have-to-be-kidding-me way. "Why not Will? He's prettier than me. Or Much. He looks more like the type, and he does mother us all. If you want it done properly, you should really do it yourself. Basically, Robin, I'm not going to do it!"
Will is trying not to laugh. John is, somehow, staying straight faced, but Djaq walked off to laugh a few minutes back -- with the attitude that, well, she wouldn't and couldn't do it, and the boys would figure it out eventually. Much isn't finding it all that funny all of a sudden. "I am not feminine."
Robin just looks exasperated. "Allan, you agreed to it last night."
"Yeah, but I was drunk! I'd agree to anything!"
"That was pretty much the point," Robin says, rolling his eyes. "And I can't do it because, well, I can't. I have things to do, you know, and a commander should always lead from the front, not from -- "
"Who here's for a new leader? I'd be a great leader. I'd, uh," Allan looks around, assessing his options, "I'd find us a more sheltered spot for a few days until we have to move on. And I'd introduce an extra mealtime. And we'd still help the poor, just not with, you know, diversions involving me telling people I'm the world's first pregnant man with a pillow shoved up my shirt!"
John clears his throat. "Who's the father supposed to be?"
"I don't suppose he knows," Much says, airily.
"Of course I don't, I'm the Virgin bloody Mary. Uh."
"I think, men," Robin says, as Allan flounders a little, and before Allan can interrupt again, "that Allan has finally agreed to it. If any of us can do it, it's him. And, by the way," he grins at Allan, "if your behaviour when you were drunk is anything to go by, Will's the father."
Will's blush is both entertaining and informative. Allan gives Robin a dirty look.
"Fine, Will, you're coming with me. Try to look proud and smug. Although me being the Virgin Allan would be a bit of a laugh."
"Nobody thinks you're a virgin, Allan."
John is, somehow, still keeping a straight face. He bends down to get something from a pile, tossing it at Allan. "Don't forget your pillow."
Robin gives Allan a critical look, watching him clutching the pillow as if he can't decide who to throw it at first. "You know, I think we might have to alter some of his clothes to make them maternity wear."
"I'll alter your -- "
Much's smile is as innocent as can be. "Hush now, Allan, you don't want to get too excited. You might hurt the baby."
Will's expression is, for a moment, nothing but a study of concentration, and then he gets a kind of sly gleam in his eyes that rarely comes out. He inches closer to Allan, carefully putting an arm around his waist as if afraid he'll bite. "You really should be careful, Allan. I wouldn't want anything to happen to you or the baby. You have to -- "
"Don't start," Allan says, warningly.
"I'd heard pregnant women were highly strung, but this really takes the biscuit and doesn't even leave any crumbs behind," Much says, musingly.
Pause. "I thought men were supposed to dote on pregnant people and give them all they want?"
"Don't push it," Robin says, grinning. "I take it you'll do it?"
"I don't seem to have a choice."
Pairing: Allan/Will
Warnings: Crack
Rating: PG
Summary: Diversions have never been so interesting. For over_look.
"Why can't Djaq do this? Or Marian? Or... anyone?"
"A lot of reasons, starting with the fact that a pregnant woman isn't much of a diversion!"
Allan stares at Robin, in that you-have-to-be-kidding-me way. "Why not Will? He's prettier than me. Or Much. He looks more like the type, and he does mother us all. If you want it done properly, you should really do it yourself. Basically, Robin, I'm not going to do it!"
Will is trying not to laugh. John is, somehow, staying straight faced, but Djaq walked off to laugh a few minutes back -- with the attitude that, well, she wouldn't and couldn't do it, and the boys would figure it out eventually. Much isn't finding it all that funny all of a sudden. "I am not feminine."
Robin just looks exasperated. "Allan, you agreed to it last night."
"Yeah, but I was drunk! I'd agree to anything!"
"That was pretty much the point," Robin says, rolling his eyes. "And I can't do it because, well, I can't. I have things to do, you know, and a commander should always lead from the front, not from -- "
"Who here's for a new leader? I'd be a great leader. I'd, uh," Allan looks around, assessing his options, "I'd find us a more sheltered spot for a few days until we have to move on. And I'd introduce an extra mealtime. And we'd still help the poor, just not with, you know, diversions involving me telling people I'm the world's first pregnant man with a pillow shoved up my shirt!"
John clears his throat. "Who's the father supposed to be?"
"I don't suppose he knows," Much says, airily.
"Of course I don't, I'm the Virgin bloody Mary. Uh."
"I think, men," Robin says, as Allan flounders a little, and before Allan can interrupt again, "that Allan has finally agreed to it. If any of us can do it, it's him. And, by the way," he grins at Allan, "if your behaviour when you were drunk is anything to go by, Will's the father."
Will's blush is both entertaining and informative. Allan gives Robin a dirty look.
"Fine, Will, you're coming with me. Try to look proud and smug. Although me being the Virgin Allan would be a bit of a laugh."
"Nobody thinks you're a virgin, Allan."
John is, somehow, still keeping a straight face. He bends down to get something from a pile, tossing it at Allan. "Don't forget your pillow."
Robin gives Allan a critical look, watching him clutching the pillow as if he can't decide who to throw it at first. "You know, I think we might have to alter some of his clothes to make them maternity wear."
"I'll alter your -- "
Much's smile is as innocent as can be. "Hush now, Allan, you don't want to get too excited. You might hurt the baby."
Will's expression is, for a moment, nothing but a study of concentration, and then he gets a kind of sly gleam in his eyes that rarely comes out. He inches closer to Allan, carefully putting an arm around his waist as if afraid he'll bite. "You really should be careful, Allan. I wouldn't want anything to happen to you or the baby. You have to -- "
"Don't start," Allan says, warningly.
"I'd heard pregnant women were highly strung, but this really takes the biscuit and doesn't even leave any crumbs behind," Much says, musingly.
Pause. "I thought men were supposed to dote on pregnant people and give them all they want?"
"Don't push it," Robin says, grinning. "I take it you'll do it?"
"I don't seem to have a choice."