What up wit' that.
Man, I think I might be a li'l offended 'bout bein' kidnapped, bu' it was more like a vacation wi' some really fucking annoyin' motherfuckers.
I mean, what kinda nigga got fuckin' records o' shit my Grandparents listened to when they was 'bout five? I mean C'MON! And don't lemme get started on them gay-ass gags!
I mean, first I mighta been little scared. I GET FLANKED BY MOTHERFUCKERS WITH GLOWIN' RED EYES. INNA DARK.
A'MOST SHIT MYSELF. Actually mighta, don't really rem'mber.
BU' NAW. They just these faggoty motherfuckers all up in spandex, an' I'm all, "the hell you want?" An' then they start pumpin' me wit' these fuckin' darts. You motherfuckers just lucky I don' mind shots, 'cause FUCK. THE HELL USES PURPLE ASS FUCKIN' DARTS. WHO YOU LET DESIGN YOU' SHIT, 'CAUSE 'EY NEEDA BE SHOT.
Mighta gotten a few motherfuckers 'fore I got taken down. What up wit' dat? I mean, you gotta mob, and I jus' got me, an' they all NOT AVOIDIN' SHIT.
An' 'en they stick some fuckin' shit in m' mouth. I mean, it was one o' them fuckin' gags, the kind 'at gotta handle so's you c'n put 'em in an' pull 'em out. But it was some fuckin' gay butterfly as a handle! But it was all coo'. Nigga started preachin, an' I'm like "nigga WHAT". He get borin' pretty damn fast. 'Fore I know it, I'm all chokin on m' spit 'cause I fell asleep, 'cause you know, I drool, but th' GAG's in th' way, an' he all up in my grill, and I'm all "DAMN MAN. EASE OFF."
It wa'n't no worse 'an bein' in Iraq. Shit, some o' them henchmen come down with thei' gamin' shit, and we played some 'fore that whiny-ass motherfucker start droppin' plates on thei' unfortunate asses. Get the hell outta that business, yo. Least the C.O.s in th' army ain't some bitchy nigga who look like he gonna rape you' ass 'cause o' what he's wearin'.
I 'on't even know why they did it in th' first place. What, 'choo get bored? Lonely?
But naw, m' man came, an' f'r a little while there I was little worried, 'cause I thought he migh' not, 'cause he all actin' weird 'fore he left. I 'ppreciate that, yo, 'cause ain't no one else gonna do it fo' me sides you. 'Cause you m'man. Didn't even mind that I all drooling and shit 'cause o' that gag. An' yo, I cover what'choo had ta pay f'r the niggas 'at came wit'choo. Fuck, I pay 'em even if they came just 'cause they owed'joo a favor, cause I want niggas like them on my side.
Oh yeah: worst fuckin' abduction ever. You gotta work on you' style, yo.
I mean, what kinda nigga got fuckin' records o' shit my Grandparents listened to when they was 'bout five? I mean C'MON! And don't lemme get started on them gay-ass gags!
I mean, first I mighta been little scared. I GET FLANKED BY MOTHERFUCKERS WITH GLOWIN' RED EYES. INNA DARK.
A'MOST SHIT MYSELF. Actually mighta, don't really rem'mber.
BU' NAW. They just these faggoty motherfuckers all up in spandex, an' I'm all, "the hell you want?" An' then they start pumpin' me wit' these fuckin' darts. You motherfuckers just lucky I don' mind shots, 'cause FUCK. THE HELL USES PURPLE ASS FUCKIN' DARTS. WHO YOU LET DESIGN YOU' SHIT, 'CAUSE 'EY NEEDA BE SHOT.
Mighta gotten a few motherfuckers 'fore I got taken down. What up wit' dat? I mean, you gotta mob, and I jus' got me, an' they all NOT AVOIDIN' SHIT.
An' 'en they stick some fuckin' shit in m' mouth. I mean, it was one o' them fuckin' gags, the kind 'at gotta handle so's you c'n put 'em in an' pull 'em out. But it was some fuckin' gay butterfly as a handle! But it was all coo'. Nigga started preachin, an' I'm like "nigga WHAT". He get borin' pretty damn fast. 'Fore I know it, I'm all chokin on m' spit 'cause I fell asleep, 'cause you know, I drool, but th' GAG's in th' way, an' he all up in my grill, and I'm all "DAMN MAN. EASE OFF."
It wa'n't no worse 'an bein' in Iraq. Shit, some o' them henchmen come down with thei' gamin' shit, and we played some 'fore that whiny-ass motherfucker start droppin' plates on thei' unfortunate asses. Get the hell outta that business, yo. Least the C.O.s in th' army ain't some bitchy nigga who look like he gonna rape you' ass 'cause o' what he's wearin'.
I 'on't even know why they did it in th' first place. What, 'choo get bored? Lonely?
But naw, m' man came, an' f'r a little while there I was little worried, 'cause I thought he migh' not, 'cause he all actin' weird 'fore he left. I 'ppreciate that, yo, 'cause ain't no one else gonna do it fo' me sides you. 'Cause you m'man. Didn't even mind that I all drooling and shit 'cause o' that gag. An' yo, I cover what'choo had ta pay f'r the niggas 'at came wit'choo. Fuck, I pay 'em even if they came just 'cause they owed'joo a favor, cause I want niggas like them on my side.
Oh yeah: worst fuckin' abduction ever. You gotta work on you' style, yo.