The truth is out there
So, ever since reading Fast Food Nation a few years ago, I've had a certain level of paranoia.
Obviously, McDonald's was out for a while. I couldn't bear to think about the literal shit in the meat -- the golden arches now looked like an ass to me (not their original intent).
I was at Boston Market one day, and suspecting something was afoot, sucked the sauce off one of my spiral noodles. THE NOODLES WERE YELLOW, creating an illusion of uniform cheesiness.
TGI Friday's put out their brand of snacks, and a friend at work mentioned how much the corn-snack "Mozzarella Sticks" tasted just like cheese sticks. My response: "Yup -- very natural -- like they were plucked from the mozzarella stick tree." Then I gave them a lecture on McD's fries and beef aspects.
The biggest piece of FFN-related paranoia came, however, when I noticed the posters outside of BK changing from "Flame-Broiled" to "with that Flame-Broiled Taste(TM)." No longer, I told whoever was unfortunate enough to be standing around with me, were the burgers actually being flame-broiled -- they were being made to taste flame-broiled! They thought I was mad at the academy, but may I present:
I am going to try this "flame-broiled potato snack," now.
The snacks are round and same-sized, just like potatoes are -- I'd say twice the diameter of a quarter. They are covered in a powder that I assume is the "Flame-Broiled" flavor.
They are thicker than Munchos, chips, and Pringles.
At first, it's a regular bbq chip. Then comes the hint of mesquite. Then the garlic, the hint of worcestershire - it's like all the flavors of the Whopper, without the beef. I'm willing to believe there's no actual beef in this, which would make it an amazing tool for someone looking to transition to a vegetarian lifestyle from fast food junk---- NO. I refuse to find something worthy in this.... Delicious Delicious but EVIL but Delicious treat.
Motherfuckers.
Obviously, McDonald's was out for a while. I couldn't bear to think about the literal shit in the meat -- the golden arches now looked like an ass to me (not their original intent).
I was at Boston Market one day, and suspecting something was afoot, sucked the sauce off one of my spiral noodles. THE NOODLES WERE YELLOW, creating an illusion of uniform cheesiness.
TGI Friday's put out their brand of snacks, and a friend at work mentioned how much the corn-snack "Mozzarella Sticks" tasted just like cheese sticks. My response: "Yup -- very natural -- like they were plucked from the mozzarella stick tree." Then I gave them a lecture on McD's fries and beef aspects.
The biggest piece of FFN-related paranoia came, however, when I noticed the posters outside of BK changing from "Flame-Broiled" to "with that Flame-Broiled Taste(TM)." No longer, I told whoever was unfortunate enough to be standing around with me, were the burgers actually being flame-broiled -- they were being made to taste flame-broiled! They thought I was mad at the academy, but may I present:
I am going to try this "flame-broiled potato snack," now.
The snacks are round and same-sized, just like potatoes are -- I'd say twice the diameter of a quarter. They are covered in a powder that I assume is the "Flame-Broiled" flavor.
They are thicker than Munchos, chips, and Pringles.
At first, it's a regular bbq chip. Then comes the hint of mesquite. Then the garlic, the hint of worcestershire - it's like all the flavors of the Whopper, without the beef. I'm willing to believe there's no actual beef in this, which would make it an amazing tool for someone looking to transition to a vegetarian lifestyle from fast food junk---- NO. I refuse to find something worthy in this.... Delicious Delicious but EVIL but Delicious treat.
Motherfuckers.