Winding down the long summer days and summer nights...
Oh, what a summer it has been... alot has happened this past few months, so many things worth nothing. But the most notable thing is someone special who, if you have been following my journal for any period of time, you know who she is. She is known as sarabeara, sawa, fara; known to me as my star, my princess, my ray of hope, and known to everyone else as sara. She reminds me of a Billy Joel song... 'you can see what you want, but shes always a woman to me'... she enervates me, and taps deep into me and brings out this glowing happy side of me i hadnt seen for so long before her... i know im taking a risk caring about her so much with such distance between us, but i wont worry about the space between us. I will focus more on the plusses, like being able to see sara more often now and knowing that we have the foundation for what could be an awesome future together. i think our distance has been on my mind alot the past few days mainly because i find it natural to have an inherent fear of the space between... but i feel that if the connection is strong enough, then there is a bond that ties and can hold apart two people, no matter the distance. but im digressing yet again and im sure i have all too much lately.
Today is a new chapter in the story of life... much like everyday is. As i turn the page, I aspire to more positive emotions, such as hope and satisfaction. I know these are very real and very possible things, so now i just sit back and look forward to the next time i see her at the end of september.
Right now i also have to think about my future and what im going to do with my education... as ive realised for some time now that not going to school is not doing anything with my life if im not in the career i want to be in. im going to call the tuition office of my school and see if i can work out a payment plan or something for this semester so i can go to school and then maybe who knows ill be able to work out some kind of financial aid for the winter semester. well see how that goes, but yeah...
and everyone will be off at school somewhere but me.. which makes me feel very lonely, and makes me want to go crazy... oh if only things were diff.. like i hit the lottery or had more moolah, but again, i digress. i just have to asses my situation and make the most of it. if i cant go this fall, it will kill me but i know i will have no reason not to go in the winter.
thats about it for right now... i just want to get on with school and make a change for the better. i feel like its time to be more than i am right now.
take care-sean
Today is a new chapter in the story of life... much like everyday is. As i turn the page, I aspire to more positive emotions, such as hope and satisfaction. I know these are very real and very possible things, so now i just sit back and look forward to the next time i see her at the end of september.
Right now i also have to think about my future and what im going to do with my education... as ive realised for some time now that not going to school is not doing anything with my life if im not in the career i want to be in. im going to call the tuition office of my school and see if i can work out a payment plan or something for this semester so i can go to school and then maybe who knows ill be able to work out some kind of financial aid for the winter semester. well see how that goes, but yeah...
and everyone will be off at school somewhere but me.. which makes me feel very lonely, and makes me want to go crazy... oh if only things were diff.. like i hit the lottery or had more moolah, but again, i digress. i just have to asses my situation and make the most of it. if i cant go this fall, it will kill me but i know i will have no reason not to go in the winter.
thats about it for right now... i just want to get on with school and make a change for the better. i feel like its time to be more than i am right now.
take care-sean