unworthy reader
What kind of reader am I.
I summed all up and conclusions weren’t joyfull ones. I`ll try to describe why I think so. Some time earlier I loved to read much, I`ve read millions of books. Those were mainly novels and that was to kill the free time, but to be honest I just didn’t want to do anything and that employment was something like the indulgence in relation to another matters. I thought that it will develop my character or something like that. But that wasn’t true. The more I read the more I think about what subjects I read. After I didn’t read anything all summer not to discredit the conscience. Now three days ago I found the old shabby small volume by Kortasar and began to read it. And that was really tasty what I was reading. I said to myself what an unworthy person you are. If you won`t think about what are you reading you`d better not read either as you did before.
The winter is coming. It is the most readable season of nature, choose what you going to do. You may always arrive to listening rock`n`roll, books are for losers. But situation with music is the same. In one moment I will devour music like books. So problem is not with losers. May be I am the unworthy reader because all I read just lay somewhere in undercover corners of subconsciousness. What is “it”? it is emotions, memories, laugh, words that I want to tell somebody in a book or who is near. I want to make it by my hands from iron ten meters tall to fly over the city squares and trying to cry. Well that was what people who built the monument to Pushkin felt. I respect them but something tells me that this is not my ultimate goal in reading. I should tell to monumentbuilders that I am not with them and their Pushkin crying because of birds. You see I began to criticize someone in some barbarous way, to entertain myself by writing about literature. The way I do it is almost unworthy. Listening rock`n`roll music will treat me in nearest future at the same way as reading. It will demand me to say something to it, to answer to all questions that I was listening silently smiling. I fear of taking guitar in my arms. It`s better to file hands on keyboard and try to print something. That`s the first attempt to answer what kind of reader am I.
Certainly I should become a writer to be a reader and see on other bookish losers like some kind of friends, not strangers. Long live to my Kortasar. At least I was thinking and even writing after taking the book in my hands after a long time.
Ooh opinions…
I summed all up and conclusions weren’t joyfull ones. I`ll try to describe why I think so. Some time earlier I loved to read much, I`ve read millions of books. Those were mainly novels and that was to kill the free time, but to be honest I just didn’t want to do anything and that employment was something like the indulgence in relation to another matters. I thought that it will develop my character or something like that. But that wasn’t true. The more I read the more I think about what subjects I read. After I didn’t read anything all summer not to discredit the conscience. Now three days ago I found the old shabby small volume by Kortasar and began to read it. And that was really tasty what I was reading. I said to myself what an unworthy person you are. If you won`t think about what are you reading you`d better not read either as you did before.
The winter is coming. It is the most readable season of nature, choose what you going to do. You may always arrive to listening rock`n`roll, books are for losers. But situation with music is the same. In one moment I will devour music like books. So problem is not with losers. May be I am the unworthy reader because all I read just lay somewhere in undercover corners of subconsciousness. What is “it”? it is emotions, memories, laugh, words that I want to tell somebody in a book or who is near. I want to make it by my hands from iron ten meters tall to fly over the city squares and trying to cry. Well that was what people who built the monument to Pushkin felt. I respect them but something tells me that this is not my ultimate goal in reading. I should tell to monumentbuilders that I am not with them and their Pushkin crying because of birds. You see I began to criticize someone in some barbarous way, to entertain myself by writing about literature. The way I do it is almost unworthy. Listening rock`n`roll music will treat me in nearest future at the same way as reading. It will demand me to say something to it, to answer to all questions that I was listening silently smiling. I fear of taking guitar in my arms. It`s better to file hands on keyboard and try to print something. That`s the first attempt to answer what kind of reader am I.
Certainly I should become a writer to be a reader and see on other bookish losers like some kind of friends, not strangers. Long live to my Kortasar. At least I was thinking and even writing after taking the book in my hands after a long time.
Ooh opinions…