[Chaptered] You - ch. 7
hi minna~
gomen ne, for the much overdue update. Too much has been going on lately and i just never had time to sit down and write. But here it is--ch. 7. douzo~
2:07 AM, Monday.
She couldn't sleep. She had tried everything; warm milk, tea with honey, counting sheep and turtles and butterflies, soothing Yiruma music, even self-hypnotizing as a last resort, though she thoroughly failed at that as well. She regretted having agreed to Yuki's request to visit her home country; she would have stayed at school writing for the school newspaper; at least something good and useful would have come out of that. But now, this, here, it was neither good nor useful. She really wished she hadn't come to Japan, that she hadn't met Akanishi and his celebrity friends who were more down-to-earth and fun than she would've thought, that she hadn't been unable to scratch that scene under the setting sun off her mind; that she hadn't been robbed of sleep because of that, because of what he did (because he really didn't say anything, not that he needed to), because of him.
Him. The bane of my existence. Goddammit. She thought, sighing out of despair as she peered at the clock in the dark, the hour hand now crawling to three.
Finally, she gave up on the idea of sleep and got out of bed, tiptoeing her way into the living room and turned on the TV with the volume muted. As she channel-surfed, something suddenly caught her eye. It was a re-run of an Utawara live, Akanishi's solo performance of "Care". She glanced at the closed door to Yuki's room and tentatively turned the volume a small notch up, just enough that she could sort of hear as she inched up to the TV. The words flashed on the screen but she could understand none of it; even so, she felt like she knew what the song was about, just by hearing his voice and watching his expression. No, it was more because of the way he sang it. She could hear an unexplicable tinge of sadness in his voice, this she surprised even herself. It was not the first time she heard of the song, but she had not seen him sing it live, his serious facial expression the perfect backdrop to the melancholy voice. It seemed so real, she thought, how he conveyed the message of the song. She would never have been able to associate him with an image brushed over by undisguised sadness. Until now. And slowly, she began to realize why he said those words and did those things. Slowly, she began to register in her mind the possibility that he really might not be who she thought he was.
-------------
"Oi, pass me that bento, will ya?" Koki called out across the table to Akanishi, who was sitting closest to the food.
No response.
Koki sighed with exasperation and smacked his bandmate on the head while snatching up the bento he had been eyeing for.
"What the hell is wrong with you these days? Always staring into space and not saying a word. It's so unlike you." Koki scowled and walked away, shaking his head.
Meet Akanishi Jin, with bags under his eyes (unseen of) and being the last one to reach for the bento (unheard of) every time for the past three days.
"Ne, you alright?"
A bento suddenly talked to him with Ueda's voice. He started.
"Oh, it's you."
Akanishi sighed in relief upon Ueda's face. Man, I thought I was hallucinating.
"Huh?" Ueda said, confused. He sat down next to his bandmate with a worried look.
"Something's bothering you, ne?"
"Eh?"
"You look like shit."
Akanishi spun his head in shock to the statement; Ueda had never been so blunt before.
"It's a fact." Ueda said nonchalantly before putting a shumai in his mouth. "It's a woman, isn't it? That's what's been bothering you."
I wonder... is it? Akanishi thought. Almost immediately, he found the possibility ludicrous.
"Nah, how is that possible? You know me. When am I ever troubled by stuff like that?" The word "love" almost escaped his lips but for some reason, he was afraid to say it, as if its verbalization would give it life.
Ueda chuckled, but didn't refute the obvious denial. He studied him, the fatigue in his bloodshot eyes and lack of energy that always used to lighten up the atmosphere.
"Na... I never thought I'd ever say this to you--you, of all people--" Ueda said quietly with an unusual seriousness in his tone, "but whoever it is, you must care about her a lot to be so weighed down by it." He began to get up and clean up the leftover food.
"But--"
"You know," Ueda glanced at Akanishi before taking off, "sometimes, you should really stop being so goddamn stubborn and listen to your heart."
Akanishi stared at Ueda's back as that last statement echoed in his ears. I can't believe it... I'm getting love advice from Ueda. Ueda, of all people.
In the distance, Ueda shook his head lightly. That baka...
---------
9:30 AM, Tuesday
"EHHH??!!"
Akanishi exclaimed in disbelief as he widened his eyes at the number on the scale, which showed 58kg, 3kg less than a week ago.
I lost 3kg in a week... how could that be...
He scratched his head while examining the scale which he believed to be broken.
"Is something wrong?" Reiho's voice rang behind him as he sauntered into the bathroom.
"Ah, I think the scale is broken..."
"Eh? I don't think so," Reiho said after getting up on the scale himself.
"But... there is no way I could've lost 3kg in a week."
Reiho stared at his older brother's gaunt face and diminished frame and sighed.
"You did. Even I could tell without the scale," he frowned. "You really didn't notice that you haven't been eating or sleeping these past few days?" he said while rummaging inside the medicine cabinet.
"Eh? Well..." Akanishi looked down and searched the tiles for an answer.
"I don't know what's bothering you so much... even work never stressed you out to the point where you're not eating." Reiho left his older brother with that and alone in the bathroom, the walls of which seemed to be closing in on him.
He glanced at the scale and out of nowhere Ueda's voice rang up next to his ears. whoever it is, you must care about her a lot to be so weighed down by it.
Is that possible? Akanishi thought, almost desperately. He closed his eyes, sat down on the toilet cover and sighed heavily.
------- an hour later -------
Ding dong.
"Hai~" Yuki shouted at the door as she dried her hands on the towel hanging off of the fridge. She did a double take as she opened the door.
"Ohayou gozaimasu," the uninvited man stood before her, bowing slightly with a sheepish smile.
--to be continued--
gomen ne, for the much overdue update. Too much has been going on lately and i just never had time to sit down and write. But here it is--ch. 7. douzo~
2:07 AM, Monday.
She couldn't sleep. She had tried everything; warm milk, tea with honey, counting sheep and turtles and butterflies, soothing Yiruma music, even self-hypnotizing as a last resort, though she thoroughly failed at that as well. She regretted having agreed to Yuki's request to visit her home country; she would have stayed at school writing for the school newspaper; at least something good and useful would have come out of that. But now, this, here, it was neither good nor useful. She really wished she hadn't come to Japan, that she hadn't met Akanishi and his celebrity friends who were more down-to-earth and fun than she would've thought, that she hadn't been unable to scratch that scene under the setting sun off her mind; that she hadn't been robbed of sleep because of that, because of what he did (because he really didn't say anything, not that he needed to), because of him.
Him. The bane of my existence. Goddammit. She thought, sighing out of despair as she peered at the clock in the dark, the hour hand now crawling to three.
Finally, she gave up on the idea of sleep and got out of bed, tiptoeing her way into the living room and turned on the TV with the volume muted. As she channel-surfed, something suddenly caught her eye. It was a re-run of an Utawara live, Akanishi's solo performance of "Care". She glanced at the closed door to Yuki's room and tentatively turned the volume a small notch up, just enough that she could sort of hear as she inched up to the TV. The words flashed on the screen but she could understand none of it; even so, she felt like she knew what the song was about, just by hearing his voice and watching his expression. No, it was more because of the way he sang it. She could hear an unexplicable tinge of sadness in his voice, this she surprised even herself. It was not the first time she heard of the song, but she had not seen him sing it live, his serious facial expression the perfect backdrop to the melancholy voice. It seemed so real, she thought, how he conveyed the message of the song. She would never have been able to associate him with an image brushed over by undisguised sadness. Until now. And slowly, she began to realize why he said those words and did those things. Slowly, she began to register in her mind the possibility that he really might not be who she thought he was.
-------------
"Oi, pass me that bento, will ya?" Koki called out across the table to Akanishi, who was sitting closest to the food.
No response.
Koki sighed with exasperation and smacked his bandmate on the head while snatching up the bento he had been eyeing for.
"What the hell is wrong with you these days? Always staring into space and not saying a word. It's so unlike you." Koki scowled and walked away, shaking his head.
Meet Akanishi Jin, with bags under his eyes (unseen of) and being the last one to reach for the bento (unheard of) every time for the past three days.
"Ne, you alright?"
A bento suddenly talked to him with Ueda's voice. He started.
"Oh, it's you."
Akanishi sighed in relief upon Ueda's face. Man, I thought I was hallucinating.
"Huh?" Ueda said, confused. He sat down next to his bandmate with a worried look.
"Something's bothering you, ne?"
"Eh?"
"You look like shit."
Akanishi spun his head in shock to the statement; Ueda had never been so blunt before.
"It's a fact." Ueda said nonchalantly before putting a shumai in his mouth. "It's a woman, isn't it? That's what's been bothering you."
I wonder... is it? Akanishi thought. Almost immediately, he found the possibility ludicrous.
"Nah, how is that possible? You know me. When am I ever troubled by stuff like that?" The word "love" almost escaped his lips but for some reason, he was afraid to say it, as if its verbalization would give it life.
Ueda chuckled, but didn't refute the obvious denial. He studied him, the fatigue in his bloodshot eyes and lack of energy that always used to lighten up the atmosphere.
"Na... I never thought I'd ever say this to you--you, of all people--" Ueda said quietly with an unusual seriousness in his tone, "but whoever it is, you must care about her a lot to be so weighed down by it." He began to get up and clean up the leftover food.
"But--"
"You know," Ueda glanced at Akanishi before taking off, "sometimes, you should really stop being so goddamn stubborn and listen to your heart."
Akanishi stared at Ueda's back as that last statement echoed in his ears. I can't believe it... I'm getting love advice from Ueda. Ueda, of all people.
In the distance, Ueda shook his head lightly. That baka...
---------
9:30 AM, Tuesday
"EHHH??!!"
Akanishi exclaimed in disbelief as he widened his eyes at the number on the scale, which showed 58kg, 3kg less than a week ago.
I lost 3kg in a week... how could that be...
He scratched his head while examining the scale which he believed to be broken.
"Is something wrong?" Reiho's voice rang behind him as he sauntered into the bathroom.
"Ah, I think the scale is broken..."
"Eh? I don't think so," Reiho said after getting up on the scale himself.
"But... there is no way I could've lost 3kg in a week."
Reiho stared at his older brother's gaunt face and diminished frame and sighed.
"You did. Even I could tell without the scale," he frowned. "You really didn't notice that you haven't been eating or sleeping these past few days?" he said while rummaging inside the medicine cabinet.
"Eh? Well..." Akanishi looked down and searched the tiles for an answer.
"I don't know what's bothering you so much... even work never stressed you out to the point where you're not eating." Reiho left his older brother with that and alone in the bathroom, the walls of which seemed to be closing in on him.
He glanced at the scale and out of nowhere Ueda's voice rang up next to his ears. whoever it is, you must care about her a lot to be so weighed down by it.
Is that possible? Akanishi thought, almost desperately. He closed his eyes, sat down on the toilet cover and sighed heavily.
------- an hour later -------
Ding dong.
"Hai~" Yuki shouted at the door as she dried her hands on the towel hanging off of the fridge. She did a double take as she opened the door.
"Ohayou gozaimasu," the uninvited man stood before her, bowing slightly with a sheepish smile.
--to be continued--