I Quit!
I was supposed to go to therapy today, but I decided while in the shower I'm not going to do it any more. I must have had a mental snap or something. I'm so fucking angry for no reason. It doesn't seem the therapy is going to work any ways. I fucking quit. If it is working, it's not going fast enough for me. I'm tired of going to this damn SAS class. It's a fucking stupid class that is telling me at every moment that I didn't work hard enough nor did I make the correct decisions last semester. That is why I am in this class. Fuck what ever circumstances I had. Where I woke up at 6am, got ready, drove 30-45 min to work, worked from 7:30 - 1:30 or so, and then drove an hour to school to be in class for an hour and fifteen minutes and then right afterwards the next class for three hours, and then I'd drive forty minutes to home to just be tired and crash in the bedroom. Did I want to do homework after a day like that. NO!!! Did I want to do it the next day? NO! I was too fucking tired and wanted to catch up on my sleep. I became stressed out too fast and now I'm in this shit fest. I get told every week by this book that I didn't try hard enough. I'm a fucking loser who just wants to blame "others" because in reality it was my own fault. Fuck how I feel it's the goddamn truth in their eyes. Their as in the author. I hate this fucking class. I hate going to this fucking therapist who just treats me like a fucking case in a file. I'm so angry at the moment right now that I am feeling dizzy. I want to just quit and crawl in the bed and sleep till the world come to a crashing halt and everyone dies. That way I don't have to deal with all this stupid petty bullshit anymore. I can't take any of this stupid shit any more. I'm tired and cranky and I just don't care any more.