(no subject)
I have to get a camera stuffed down my throat today.. Need to look at my "growth" in my stummy... It may be cancer and this is the only way they'll know for sure I guess. And since no one can drive me I have to be awake during it so I'm freakin out right now... AHHHHH! I just hope it's nothing serious ya knowwww?
So I've been doing nothing.. Sitting around, not talking much to Eric because he's been acting different towards me and I'm nto sure if it's because he's with someone else or if he's just sick of talking to me all the time and he hates me? Who knows? When I ask him what's up he's got nuffin to say - grrr BOYS ARE STUPID!
I hate that Alex thinks he needs to talk about me.. Nothing is going on with him and I, and there never will be anything. I don't like him that way. I went to his house twice and one of the times we laid in a hammock NEXT to each other so I guess that means something? GRRRRRRR NO! IT DOES NOT MEAN ANYTHING! IT'S JUST NOT LIKE THAT! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
So misunderstood...
I feel like no one understands me lately...
I HATE FEELING ALONE!
I want him to kiss me when I cry.. I want him to call back when I hang up.. I want him to be able to say sorry.. I want him to be able to fess up to thinking someone is pretty - even if he thinks she's prettier than me.. I want to know what's going on in his head.. I want him to talk so I don't feel like I'm the only one who does.. I want him to feel like I do.. I want him to call me on his breaks out of the blue.. I want him to surprise me.. I want him to be spontanious.. I want him to get on one knee.. I want him to propose.. I want to be his everything like he is mine.. I want him to love me.. I want him to hold me.. I want him to understand or try his hardest.. I want him to be there for me when I need him.. I want him to make me laugh.. I want him to laugh at me when I'm trying to be funny.. I want him to be himself.. I want him to have 1 single personality in front of everyone.. I want him to fall asleep with me in his arms.. I want things to be like when we first started dating forever.. I want him to feel the tingles.. I want him to feel like I'm all he'll ever need.. I want him to want me!
So I've been doing nothing.. Sitting around, not talking much to Eric because he's been acting different towards me and I'm nto sure if it's because he's with someone else or if he's just sick of talking to me all the time and he hates me? Who knows? When I ask him what's up he's got nuffin to say - grrr BOYS ARE STUPID!
I hate that Alex thinks he needs to talk about me.. Nothing is going on with him and I, and there never will be anything. I don't like him that way. I went to his house twice and one of the times we laid in a hammock NEXT to each other so I guess that means something? GRRRRRRR NO! IT DOES NOT MEAN ANYTHING! IT'S JUST NOT LIKE THAT! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
So misunderstood...
I feel like no one understands me lately...
I HATE FEELING ALONE!
I want him to kiss me when I cry.. I want him to call back when I hang up.. I want him to be able to say sorry.. I want him to be able to fess up to thinking someone is pretty - even if he thinks she's prettier than me.. I want to know what's going on in his head.. I want him to talk so I don't feel like I'm the only one who does.. I want him to feel like I do.. I want him to call me on his breaks out of the blue.. I want him to surprise me.. I want him to be spontanious.. I want him to get on one knee.. I want him to propose.. I want to be his everything like he is mine.. I want him to love me.. I want him to hold me.. I want him to understand or try his hardest.. I want him to be there for me when I need him.. I want him to make me laugh.. I want him to laugh at me when I'm trying to be funny.. I want him to be himself.. I want him to have 1 single personality in front of everyone.. I want him to fall asleep with me in his arms.. I want things to be like when we first started dating forever.. I want him to feel the tingles.. I want him to feel like I'm all he'll ever need.. I want him to want me!