im scared im gonna fuck it up.
im always laying there in this half sitting up, dazed possition, half watching the tv i have on to lull me to to sleep,smoking cigarettes, with this completely asleep body next to mine. and im always looking over at him, knowing how much he loves me, and how much i love him, and how i am so glad we get to spend every moment together. and how i am so glad that this person finally came to me. this person that really absolutly appreciates me and cares about me. i finally have someone that will hold me in their arms and tell me everthing is going to be okay. that im good enough. im perfect. im so happy.