By now, you should've somehow realized what you've got to do.
I'm feeling irritable and depressed. Being around my dad does not really help anything. I can never do anything right according to him. No matter what I do, it's never good enough. If I clean the kitchen, he asks why I didn't clean the living room. Never mind that he's been sitting on his ass all day. He acts like my mom and I don't work or that our work isn't as stressful or as important as his. I have to clean the kitchen every night because he spent all day at work and is tired. Uh, and I didn't? He is constantly giving orders, but never tries to do anything himself. Last time I checked, my mom and I don't work for Molly Maids.
He gets more conservative each day and I just can't stand it. It's all, this is my house and I'm the man of the house, etc. Then there's my favorite, "When a man is doing X, it means he wants to relax." I feel like he's training me to be a housewife because he's going to sell me off to some Neanderthal.
I could go on and on forever about how much I can't stand him. Let's just say that if it wasn't for the fact that I'm up to my eyeballs in student loans, I would so be out of here.
Fuck, I just want to curl up and cry. And I know that part of it is that I will be spending my birthday completely alone for the first time in my life. That probably sounds lame. It's just that my dad insisted on booking his and my mom's trip to Seattle the week of my birthday. He claimed that no other week would work because of his business trips and our season tickets for the White Sox but he could've waited until the first week of October when none of that was going on or he could've given the tickets for whatever week to my uncles so it wouldn't be a concern. It's not like the weather out there is going to change all that dramatically two weeks later. But he always has to have his way, so I get stuck with the consequences.
I'm not sure whether to take my birthday off of work or just go in. On the one hand, if I'm going to be all depressed and want to cry the whole day, I'd rather not do it at work. On the other hand, if I go to work, maybe I'll be distracted enough not to do that.
Really, I am just so goddamned sick of everything being fine and then suddenly diving into these deep depressions. When I was out with my mom today, I was fine. We went to the mall and I ended up getting like 10 shirts for $6 each off the clearance rack. It was all good. Then my dad comes home and I just start sliding downhill because he just grinds me down into dirt all the time. Oh, and if I try to explain how I feel? I'm attacking him, of course.
And, you know, I tried to come up with something that the two of us could do tonight because I know he doesn't like it when I spend all night on the computer while my mom is at work, but he shot down every single suggestion. Now, of course, he's bothering me every five seconds with something that I could care less about. Oh, he changed one of the light bulbs in my room. Whoofuckinghoo.
I'm feeling too many emotions at once and it's just too much. Even though I don't want to spend my birthday alone, I can't wait until he's gone for a whole week. I need a fucking break before I breakdown.
He gets more conservative each day and I just can't stand it. It's all, this is my house and I'm the man of the house, etc. Then there's my favorite, "When a man is doing X, it means he wants to relax." I feel like he's training me to be a housewife because he's going to sell me off to some Neanderthal.
I could go on and on forever about how much I can't stand him. Let's just say that if it wasn't for the fact that I'm up to my eyeballs in student loans, I would so be out of here.
Fuck, I just want to curl up and cry. And I know that part of it is that I will be spending my birthday completely alone for the first time in my life. That probably sounds lame. It's just that my dad insisted on booking his and my mom's trip to Seattle the week of my birthday. He claimed that no other week would work because of his business trips and our season tickets for the White Sox but he could've waited until the first week of October when none of that was going on or he could've given the tickets for whatever week to my uncles so it wouldn't be a concern. It's not like the weather out there is going to change all that dramatically two weeks later. But he always has to have his way, so I get stuck with the consequences.
I'm not sure whether to take my birthday off of work or just go in. On the one hand, if I'm going to be all depressed and want to cry the whole day, I'd rather not do it at work. On the other hand, if I go to work, maybe I'll be distracted enough not to do that.
Really, I am just so goddamned sick of everything being fine and then suddenly diving into these deep depressions. When I was out with my mom today, I was fine. We went to the mall and I ended up getting like 10 shirts for $6 each off the clearance rack. It was all good. Then my dad comes home and I just start sliding downhill because he just grinds me down into dirt all the time. Oh, and if I try to explain how I feel? I'm attacking him, of course.
And, you know, I tried to come up with something that the two of us could do tonight because I know he doesn't like it when I spend all night on the computer while my mom is at work, but he shot down every single suggestion. Now, of course, he's bothering me every five seconds with something that I could care less about. Oh, he changed one of the light bulbs in my room. Whoofuckinghoo.
I'm feeling too many emotions at once and it's just too much. Even though I don't want to spend my birthday alone, I can't wait until he's gone for a whole week. I need a fucking break before I breakdown.