crooked
so, I hate this pain in my head. stupid teeth. stupid me for neglecting myself for years.
but I cant stand the pain meds either. I hate feeling like this. so not myself. my brain is swimmy. I feel numb and tingly and drunk and lost... I know a lot of people who would pay a lot to feel like this... but I cant stand it. I dont like feeling like this. I dont like feeling not like myself.I'm dizzy and fidgety and awkward... i can see but its not clear. my senses are dulled. cant think clearly. I feel like I'm missing something. like i blinked at the pivotal point in the story. the big plot twist and I was in the john.
but at the same time... i dont think anythings changed. it just feels like it to me because my brain is off centered. I'm not balanced and so to my eyes the world looks crooked.
Damn this long weekend. Damn this tooth. I hate being medicated. I hate not feeling like myself. drugs are bad mmkay? blah blah blah. yada yada yada.
but I cant stand the pain meds either. I hate feeling like this. so not myself. my brain is swimmy. I feel numb and tingly and drunk and lost... I know a lot of people who would pay a lot to feel like this... but I cant stand it. I dont like feeling like this. I dont like feeling not like myself.I'm dizzy and fidgety and awkward... i can see but its not clear. my senses are dulled. cant think clearly. I feel like I'm missing something. like i blinked at the pivotal point in the story. the big plot twist and I was in the john.
but at the same time... i dont think anythings changed. it just feels like it to me because my brain is off centered. I'm not balanced and so to my eyes the world looks crooked.
Damn this long weekend. Damn this tooth. I hate being medicated. I hate not feeling like myself. drugs are bad mmkay? blah blah blah. yada yada yada.