(no subject)
Lately, I have grown tired of modeling. My passion does not lie within modeling, it embodies me entirely in everything that I do. I took this photo of myself last night. I don't really know what inspired this. With any project, I just started with a blank canvas and just did what I felt. I have been feeling increasingly anxious. I feel as though I am being held back by some unknown force, possibly within myself. My friend told me this was very 'Black Swan of me', but I hadn't seen the movie until today. After watching that movie, and taking a long hot shower while listening to Beethoven, it occurred to me that I am fighting something within myself. I am holding myself back, no one else. I am the Swan Queen, composed of both good and evil. I can't deny but embrace both qualities. You cannot have the good without the bad, light without darkness, sweet without sour. It's all relative and directly related. I need to learn to embrace all of me, even the evils within myself.
For the record, I'm tired of being single.
