(no subject)
I was bored at work yesterday (big surprise) so I started to make a new guest list for the wedding. Once I got through family, I started listing friends that we would want to be there. I came to the realisation that the older I get, the fewer real close friends I have. I was looking through my facebook friends list to see if I was missing anyone, and I can honestly tell you that although I have a lot of acquaintances, I can fit my actual close friends on two hands. Aside from Kathryn, Marissa, Dorothy, Tom and sometimes Stacey, the friends I had in high school who I thought I would be friends with forever are practically non-existant in my life right now. We live 5 hours apart, and neither me nor them have made much of an effort to keep in touch. And you know what? I am totally okay with that. I love my friends and I have never, ever been happier.
That doesn't mean that choosing who to invite is easy, though! I really, really just want to invite close friends and family. I don't want to ivite my cousin Adam, because he has pretty much cut all ties with the family. But I do want to invite his sister. I don't want to invite about 7 of the 12 people I hung out with in high school because we just don't talk anymore. That group is very cliquey though, and I am worried that the 5 people that I want to be there won't come because I didn't invite everyone. I don't know what to do. Suck it up and invite the people that I don't necessarily want to be there because that's what is expected? Or invite whoever the fuck I want, knowing that if people refuse to come because of the fact that others weren't invited then they aren't real friends anyway. Now, the reason that I don't want certain people to come is not due to the fact that we've had a falling out, or that they will be out of control at the wedding - they are great people. It is simply because we have fallen out of touch, and I want this wedding to be as intimate as possible given the fact that we have huge families.