(no subject)
Today has been a day that I dont think Id like to repeat. Sure I had a smile on and laughed and stuff but deep down I was hurting so badly. You see today would be Todd Curries 19th birthday. And if it wasnt for a stupid faggot who was driving him around drunk a year and a half ago he'd still be here today to celebrate it. I wish I could talk to him one more time, hug him, smell him, gosh just anything with him. One more ride home so I could just soak up as much of his presence as I possibly could. One more trip to our lockers for just one last conversation. JUST ONE MORE! The morning started out okay... at church I began to get a little sad but as soon as I did Preacher Henry started talkin about the part in Matthew where Jesus says "Blessed be those who mourn, for they will be comforted." And of course naturally I began to tear up a little bit but God just put his hand on me and gave me strength. As the day progressed I began to just feel myself longing to be around him. I just wish I could talk to him one more time! I genuinely just miss his presence. So I resorted to my memory box full of pictures and memorbilia of him.. wow. Such a beautiful beautiful person. I found one of us at a party on his 17th bday. 2 years ago today...thats weird to think about. I wish he would have had the opportunity to live out the life he intended to. I wish he was here to be with his family and friends and celebrate another birthday. I wish his mom could hold him one more time because like she said .. she cant find peace. And I wish so badly she could. I cant imagine how bad she hurts. Im sorry. Please come back =(
<3 Hay
<3 Hay