Pondering Autumn
I love the fact that fall is approaching. Today I'm back in York, PA (our house, NOT our home). It's a lovely day, a comfortable 75 degrees or so outside, blue sky, light breeze, birds abound. Today the sun is hitting the pond in the backyard nicely! I went out to look at the fish and the frog was hovering at the top of the water!
I have been sitting in the kitchen at the sea-foam green and cream-cicle orange table reading "Compulsory Heterosexuality and Lesbian Existence" very interesting, indeed!
Thinking a lot about what I need and what I definitely do NOT need in my life right now. Been in a very reflective mood for the past week or so and it's starting to drain me. I'm not nearly as happy and peppy as I used to be and it's scaring me... Is it the people I'm around/not around? Is it the dynamics of our relationships changing? I think the latter is a far more likely cause.
In any case, I've been doing pretty well with my classes, keeping up and such. The only class that's stressing me out is the (surprise, surprise!) writing intensive class--Feminist Theory (for which I'm reading the above mentioned Adrienne Rich article).
Cicadas! I love the sound they make! That chirp-buzz-hum sound. I also love the sound of a passing train, the drone of the wheels on the tracks is mesmerizing!
Hopefully I'll find some sort of meaning soon, some sort of passion in my school work that makes me feel like there's hope... I think I want to be on the West Coast again, then again when I reminisce being on Portland State University's campus I'm reminded that I can feel alone and disconnected anywhere... I just wish I could remember that home feeling. Or maybe I never felt a home feeling, perhaps my nostalgia for home will always be felt. I never felt that before I left Washington State, though... Oh well. It'll happen eventually!
M
I have been sitting in the kitchen at the sea-foam green and cream-cicle orange table reading "Compulsory Heterosexuality and Lesbian Existence" very interesting, indeed!
Thinking a lot about what I need and what I definitely do NOT need in my life right now. Been in a very reflective mood for the past week or so and it's starting to drain me. I'm not nearly as happy and peppy as I used to be and it's scaring me... Is it the people I'm around/not around? Is it the dynamics of our relationships changing? I think the latter is a far more likely cause.
In any case, I've been doing pretty well with my classes, keeping up and such. The only class that's stressing me out is the (surprise, surprise!) writing intensive class--Feminist Theory (for which I'm reading the above mentioned Adrienne Rich article).
Cicadas! I love the sound they make! That chirp-buzz-hum sound. I also love the sound of a passing train, the drone of the wheels on the tracks is mesmerizing!
Hopefully I'll find some sort of meaning soon, some sort of passion in my school work that makes me feel like there's hope... I think I want to be on the West Coast again, then again when I reminisce being on Portland State University's campus I'm reminded that I can feel alone and disconnected anywhere... I just wish I could remember that home feeling. Or maybe I never felt a home feeling, perhaps my nostalgia for home will always be felt. I never felt that before I left Washington State, though... Oh well. It'll happen eventually!
M