high school...is over with
Something random to begin: I stumbled across this Gigi fans forum online, but it's all in simplified Chinese. I am more comfortable with traditional because that's what Hong Kong and Taiwan use, and although there are many of the same words between the two, I really only have a vague idea at best what the people on the forum are saying. It is, however, very very active, and they have a TON of downloads (various Gigi clips from tv shows, guest appearances, performances, etc.) but the only thing is that you have to have posted a certain number in order to download the clips. I've watched a few so far, but they haven't been very good. I need to post 50 entries if I want to see some actual good performances. So, I've been wondering what all these mainland Chinese Gigi fans must be thinking of this random American posting in their forum entirely in English.
Another note is that I must stop procrastinating. I didn't do a whole lot of it in high school, and college IS NOT the time to make up for all the procrastinating I didn't do four years ago. I'm not falling behind in any of my classes, but I feel that I can always spend more time going over stuff and preparing for lecture, etc...doing the recommended, not just required, reading. I feel like I would have done this during high school, but with dorm life, the distractions are right next door, and it's really hard to block them out. This wasn't a big deal first semester because my classes were easier and my workload lighter, but now that I'm on 16 credit hours, I really shouldn't be goofing off as much as I am. I feel like a slacker, and it's a dirty feeling.
So, high school drama had ended, so I thought, but I think I'm getting a preview of what's to come. So I kinda like this girl named Eva who I saw on facebook...yes, I know that's kinda creepy and definitely superficial, but she seems like a nice girl, from what I can tell. And it also turns out that she has a few classes with some of my friends from my hall. Predictably, it may just seem that she may like one of my better friends here who has classes with her. But, naturally, he is not remotely interested in her, so I guess the message to me is to stop caring about her, because I really have no reason for liking her at all. Heck, I haven't even met the girl yet. And if things work out between her and my friend (maybe he only doesn't like her because he knows that I kinda in a strange way that will never really matter do), then that'll be good for them. Still, the one time I do happen to be interested in someone, she happens to fall for a friend. Of course, all of this is based on good ol' speculation, like from my friends' interpretation of her tone and such. Egh. It's all quite disturbing that I haven't been on a date or asked a girl out since...ever. And I was asked out once and that didn't really count. Yeah, it's discouraging. I have the feeling that people don't like me, at least not in that sense. And as much as I want to believe that there's someone for everyone, no one has ever really seen me that way. I just don't suit the role of the guy who people have crushes on. I'm always on the sidelines, a good friend, hardworking (is this still applicable) student, etc. And just once, I would like to treat a girl to a nice dinner (chauvinistic? maybe. I guess she could pay for herself if she wanted to) and get to know her and have her actually like me. It's been this reverse process for so long, that I like girls but they never like me back. I'm tired of it. If this university's so big and now is my chance to start over, I don't ask the question to evoke pity, but I just want to know: why doesn't anyone like me?! Don't really want to spend the next three years of my life date-less and single, at least not really, even though I could definitely see the disadvantages of having a girlfriend: being attached to the hip, always having someone around, etc. Still, I would like to have the experience myself to figure out if I like it or not. That probably involves me asking someone out, too. But I know that in the end, I'm just too chicken. Now that I'm done with an exaggerating rant, I'll try and study a bit more. Glad I could provide you with a pathetic excuse to procrastinate.
zaijian
Another note is that I must stop procrastinating. I didn't do a whole lot of it in high school, and college IS NOT the time to make up for all the procrastinating I didn't do four years ago. I'm not falling behind in any of my classes, but I feel that I can always spend more time going over stuff and preparing for lecture, etc...doing the recommended, not just required, reading. I feel like I would have done this during high school, but with dorm life, the distractions are right next door, and it's really hard to block them out. This wasn't a big deal first semester because my classes were easier and my workload lighter, but now that I'm on 16 credit hours, I really shouldn't be goofing off as much as I am. I feel like a slacker, and it's a dirty feeling.
So, high school drama had ended, so I thought, but I think I'm getting a preview of what's to come. So I kinda like this girl named Eva who I saw on facebook...yes, I know that's kinda creepy and definitely superficial, but she seems like a nice girl, from what I can tell. And it also turns out that she has a few classes with some of my friends from my hall. Predictably, it may just seem that she may like one of my better friends here who has classes with her. But, naturally, he is not remotely interested in her, so I guess the message to me is to stop caring about her, because I really have no reason for liking her at all. Heck, I haven't even met the girl yet. And if things work out between her and my friend (maybe he only doesn't like her because he knows that I kinda in a strange way that will never really matter do), then that'll be good for them. Still, the one time I do happen to be interested in someone, she happens to fall for a friend. Of course, all of this is based on good ol' speculation, like from my friends' interpretation of her tone and such. Egh. It's all quite disturbing that I haven't been on a date or asked a girl out since...ever. And I was asked out once and that didn't really count. Yeah, it's discouraging. I have the feeling that people don't like me, at least not in that sense. And as much as I want to believe that there's someone for everyone, no one has ever really seen me that way. I just don't suit the role of the guy who people have crushes on. I'm always on the sidelines, a good friend, hardworking (is this still applicable) student, etc. And just once, I would like to treat a girl to a nice dinner (chauvinistic? maybe. I guess she could pay for herself if she wanted to) and get to know her and have her actually like me. It's been this reverse process for so long, that I like girls but they never like me back. I'm tired of it. If this university's so big and now is my chance to start over, I don't ask the question to evoke pity, but I just want to know: why doesn't anyone like me?! Don't really want to spend the next three years of my life date-less and single, at least not really, even though I could definitely see the disadvantages of having a girlfriend: being attached to the hip, always having someone around, etc. Still, I would like to have the experience myself to figure out if I like it or not. That probably involves me asking someone out, too. But I know that in the end, I'm just too chicken. Now that I'm done with an exaggerating rant, I'll try and study a bit more. Glad I could provide you with a pathetic excuse to procrastinate.
zaijian