(no subject)
why the hell am i so miserable? what did i do to deserve this? i've been a good person haven't i? haven't i helped people whenever i could? so then why the hell does god hate me? *sigh* i just want to be loved by someone. i just want one person to say that i mean something to them. just one single solitary person. just a simple sentence. i care about you. you mean something to me. but no. i will never have something like that. i exist only to be used it seems. it seems that i'm just a conveinant fall back. is there anyone out there? does anybody care? how does everyone have the amazing ability to make me miserable? what do they want from me?they always ask for my help without ever giving. people mock me for being different. i find myself locked in a closet of mediocrity. i can't escape. the world is closing in. they are like zombies sucking the life out of everything. i'm sick of life. sick of living. hmmm. i wonder if anyone would miss me. do you think so? damn you!speak to me you damn piece of plastic monolithe. why is it the people i care about want nothing to do with me and the people i hate won't leave me alone. i've been talking less and less with rachael. i don't think she wants to talk to me anymore. i swear i'll give up when that happens. ashley avoids me when she gets the chance. shayla is leaving and not coming back. oh god almighty in heaven above why do you forsake me. have i done somehting to anger you. have i done some unspeakable evil? i'm finished with this. if you want to find me. perhaps to use me. just give me a call. i'm under hell in the phone book.
perhaps this is it, but as always i hope you live long prosper and may the force be with you.
josh
perhaps this is it, but as always i hope you live long prosper and may the force be with you.
josh