It's amazing how differently we perceive people from our childhood. And from our personal standpoint. If nothing else, your dad sounds distant and not the kind you'd cuddle up to. It doesn't mean he didn't love you (though, of course, I have no way of knowing that), it just means he didn't show it well. Sigh
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your dad sounds distant and not the kind you'd cuddle up to. It doesn't mean he didn't love you (though, of course, I have no way of knowing that), it just means he didn't show it well. Exactly--he did love us, he just had no way of expressing it. In his eyes, the fact that he took care of us proved his love for us. DIfferent generation. :)
That definitely is one of the reasons. But also, different personality. Some people just have a tough time expressing feelings. Especially those of affection. Sigh. Sucks, though, that you grew up feeling unloved. *Hugs!*
Isn't it kind of sad that dads were like that? I don't really remember my dad telling me he loved me hardly ever in my life, even though I know that it's true. But I do think that it's awesome that he remembers details about you as a baby. It's kind of weird to adjust how we think about our parents, but at least this is in a good way, not a bad. And I do think that's it's nice that he seems to be having a good time with your kids because that grandparent/grandkid relationship should be a good one, right?
It's kind of weird to adjust how we think about our parents, but at least this is in a good way, not a bad. And I do think that's it's nice that he seems to be having a good time with your kids because that grandparent/grandkid relationship should be a good one, right?
It is odd, isn't it? I think I'm still coming to terms w/the fact that they were human beings. :) I am pretty happy to see him this "in love" with my kids.
My dad was not one to say I love you, either, but I wouldn't say he was an asshole. Just not given to displays of affection like most men of his generation. He didn't play with us much at all, other than taking us to the pool and teaching us to swim, but he was always present and supportive at our various activities, and worked hard to provide, etc.
One of my favorite pics of him is on the floor playing My Little Pony with my youngest daughter. :) It seems that generation of men has finally been able to loosen up a bit with their grandchildren, which is a good thing IMO.
Oh my dad was an asshole not for his inability to say I love you, but because he drank and beat the crap out of me for the smallest infractions. He loved us but proved it the same way his dad did -- working like a dog to provide for us. :)
It's not that I didn't have any happy memories with my dad, they're just blocked by all the negative crap that happened during my youth.
But enough about my daddy-issues, how the heck are you! I know I've been gone for too long so I have no idea what's up with everyone. How are you? How are the girls? Are you still scrappin? How'd the job search turn out (I know that was a while back). I'll have to check out your LJ to see what I missed.
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Exactly--he did love us, he just had no way of expressing it. In his eyes, the fact that he took care of us proved his love for us. DIfferent generation. :)
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That definitely is one of the reasons. But also, different personality. Some people just have a tough time expressing feelings. Especially those of affection. Sigh. Sucks, though, that you grew up feeling unloved. *Hugs!*
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It is odd, isn't it? I think I'm still coming to terms w/the fact that they were human beings. :) I am pretty happy to see him this "in love" with my kids.
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One of my favorite pics of him is on the floor playing My Little Pony with my youngest daughter. :) It seems that generation of men has finally been able to loosen up a bit with their grandchildren, which is a good thing IMO.
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It's not that I didn't have any happy memories with my dad, they're just blocked by all the negative crap that happened during my youth.
But enough about my daddy-issues, how the heck are you! I know I've been gone for too long so I have no idea what's up with everyone. How are you? How are the girls? Are you still scrappin? How'd the job search turn out (I know that was a while back). I'll have to check out your LJ to see what I missed.
I hope you're doing well. :)
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