On Fasting
Today marks a week since I started fasting for Lent.
The first thing to note is that the fast is not a dietary adjustment in terms of trying to lose weight or going vegan. It is an exercise in a religious practice centered around the idea of self-restraint, self-denial in the name of something higher.
For me, it is hard to take the religious part very seriously. I am alone here, no Greeks around me, and the church is hard to get to. Furthermore, as those who have followed this blog know, I am not spiritually Christian. I am Greek Orthodox by birth and baptism, it is part of the Greek culture that I love, and, in some way, as big a part of my identity as my personal religious beliefs. I am pagan, but I have never really found a community of worship. I center my beliefs on gods and goddesses that most people think of as characters from a poem written 3000 years ago, but I also know that divisions between this god or that god, this goddess or that goddess, are ultimately futile and false. Humans like me need them, because we need a way to connect with the divine, but in the end, all gods are manifest creations of the same idea, shadows cast from the same being.
There is a falsity in me embracing my Greekness, but cherry-picking the parts of the culture that make me comfortable. Greeks are a godly people, they are interested in god, and committed to climbing the ladder to divinity that gods offer.For much of the past two millenia, that god has been the Christian one. And I would also be lying if there wasn't an element of 'passing' in my performance as a Christian. I need to function in a society where I have influence and pull, and the societies that I have access to are the Christian ones. I experience my Greekness, and that includes the current religion. The problem is that Lent is one of those weird acts that is not supposed to be a performance, and yet, as a type of sacrifice, needs an audience to have effect.
Honestly, the exercise of self-restraint in probably more valuable for me than the religious practice. Greek Orthodox Lent is a prescribed practice; there are no outright choices in what you give up. There is no consumption of meat, fish, eggs, dairy, alcohol, and olive oil.
But there are also qualifiers. On feast days, you may break the fast in different ways. On weekends, for example, you can drink wine and use olive oil. Shellfish, Octopus, and Squid are all allowed all the time. And then there are the personal choices in how to interpret the rules. I have given up olive oil as something to eat, but not as something to cook with. I could go get another oil, but it would be a huge hassle. Lent isn't about giving up as much as possible, it's about restraining yourself in a way that allows you to make room for more important things. It's not to be about self-harm or self-promotion. If Lent is making you sick or tired, you are allowed to add something that could help you. I know that I've been getting tired and nasty around mid-afternoon. I've started using my protein powder, which is whey-based, in smoothies or cereal in the morning.
Even more important, the fast isn't about making people run around to accommodate you. It isn't a serious food allergy, or a moral dietary preference. You are not allowed to be an ungracious host or guest during Lent because of the fast. You are not to remove yourself entirely from society in the name of religion. When my mother came to visit me, she took me out to a restaurant which had no vegetarian or vegan entrees. I had the flounder and didn't feel guilty.
So how do I feel, after one week of Lent?
Tired. I'm watching my protein intake carefully. Peanut butter, lentil soup, beans of all kinds, quinoa, spinach and kale, these are all my friends. Careful. Because I have to watch what I'm taking in, I am more mindful and more appreciative of what I eat. I have less of a desire to eat junk food, and more of a desire to taste everything. The hardest part is giving up eggs and dairy, because I do get a lot of my protein from those sources, especially in the morning. After that, the sacrifice of alcohol, because it's such an important part of the social scene of law school.
And I shudder to think about experiencing the end of hockey season without a Boston Lager at my side.
I obviously still have choices to make in my future, but so far, I don't regret Lent. I'm just getting super excited for Easter.
The first thing to note is that the fast is not a dietary adjustment in terms of trying to lose weight or going vegan. It is an exercise in a religious practice centered around the idea of self-restraint, self-denial in the name of something higher.
For me, it is hard to take the religious part very seriously. I am alone here, no Greeks around me, and the church is hard to get to. Furthermore, as those who have followed this blog know, I am not spiritually Christian. I am Greek Orthodox by birth and baptism, it is part of the Greek culture that I love, and, in some way, as big a part of my identity as my personal religious beliefs. I am pagan, but I have never really found a community of worship. I center my beliefs on gods and goddesses that most people think of as characters from a poem written 3000 years ago, but I also know that divisions between this god or that god, this goddess or that goddess, are ultimately futile and false. Humans like me need them, because we need a way to connect with the divine, but in the end, all gods are manifest creations of the same idea, shadows cast from the same being.
There is a falsity in me embracing my Greekness, but cherry-picking the parts of the culture that make me comfortable. Greeks are a godly people, they are interested in god, and committed to climbing the ladder to divinity that gods offer.For much of the past two millenia, that god has been the Christian one. And I would also be lying if there wasn't an element of 'passing' in my performance as a Christian. I need to function in a society where I have influence and pull, and the societies that I have access to are the Christian ones. I experience my Greekness, and that includes the current religion. The problem is that Lent is one of those weird acts that is not supposed to be a performance, and yet, as a type of sacrifice, needs an audience to have effect.
Honestly, the exercise of self-restraint in probably more valuable for me than the religious practice. Greek Orthodox Lent is a prescribed practice; there are no outright choices in what you give up. There is no consumption of meat, fish, eggs, dairy, alcohol, and olive oil.
But there are also qualifiers. On feast days, you may break the fast in different ways. On weekends, for example, you can drink wine and use olive oil. Shellfish, Octopus, and Squid are all allowed all the time. And then there are the personal choices in how to interpret the rules. I have given up olive oil as something to eat, but not as something to cook with. I could go get another oil, but it would be a huge hassle. Lent isn't about giving up as much as possible, it's about restraining yourself in a way that allows you to make room for more important things. It's not to be about self-harm or self-promotion. If Lent is making you sick or tired, you are allowed to add something that could help you. I know that I've been getting tired and nasty around mid-afternoon. I've started using my protein powder, which is whey-based, in smoothies or cereal in the morning.
Even more important, the fast isn't about making people run around to accommodate you. It isn't a serious food allergy, or a moral dietary preference. You are not allowed to be an ungracious host or guest during Lent because of the fast. You are not to remove yourself entirely from society in the name of religion. When my mother came to visit me, she took me out to a restaurant which had no vegetarian or vegan entrees. I had the flounder and didn't feel guilty.
So how do I feel, after one week of Lent?
Tired. I'm watching my protein intake carefully. Peanut butter, lentil soup, beans of all kinds, quinoa, spinach and kale, these are all my friends. Careful. Because I have to watch what I'm taking in, I am more mindful and more appreciative of what I eat. I have less of a desire to eat junk food, and more of a desire to taste everything. The hardest part is giving up eggs and dairy, because I do get a lot of my protein from those sources, especially in the morning. After that, the sacrifice of alcohol, because it's such an important part of the social scene of law school.
And I shudder to think about experiencing the end of hockey season without a Boston Lager at my side.
I obviously still have choices to make in my future, but so far, I don't regret Lent. I'm just getting super excited for Easter.