an unheard apology
so i haven't done this in a long time. work has been crazy and school and well you know how it goes. but that's not what this is about. it doesn't matter how much i work or what is going on with school...what matters is i messed up. i hurt someone really close to me really badly. i could never be more sorry for that. i somehow thought that if i never said anything and i never talked about it then maybe i could fool myself into thinking nothing ever happened. honestly though who was i kidding. it did happen and it is real and even though it didn't really go that far the fact that anything happened at all left a mark on someone's heart that no matter what i say and no matter what i do it can never be fixed. since the day i stepped onto this campus i haven't loved anyone the way i loved him. he was my my whole heart and in one night i took that away from myself. in one night i lost my lover, my best friend, and my soulmate. i can sit here and say that in time things will be okay but that's not true. it will never be the same and he may never forgive me. either way i have lost his trust and am left just sitting with nothing to say but i'm sorry.