(no subject)
Packing on no sleep, dragging myself out of bed to overanalysis of my losing battle against time. Total exhaustion, unable to stand the loco parentals, and the speeding of times before a sudden end.
The unexplainable unbearable loneliness, in a five hour coach trip. Running 50% late, stuck in roadworks in milton keynes, which shouldn't even be en route. With a painfully midlands accent spending an hour deconstructing the family psychodrama she faces in my ear, dreading my own ahead of me. Having to spend a weekend hiding how life is from my sisters and failing, or worse, succeeding at the task. Experimental film and lucozade just about last the distance. And then i'm with family again and it's good and i'm loved and surrounded by people in their early twenties with lives and careers and skills and houses and spouses who were kids a few heartbeats ago.
The unexplainable unbearable loneliness, in a five hour coach trip. Running 50% late, stuck in roadworks in milton keynes, which shouldn't even be en route. With a painfully midlands accent spending an hour deconstructing the family psychodrama she faces in my ear, dreading my own ahead of me. Having to spend a weekend hiding how life is from my sisters and failing, or worse, succeeding at the task. Experimental film and lucozade just about last the distance. And then i'm with family again and it's good and i'm loved and surrounded by people in their early twenties with lives and careers and skills and houses and spouses who were kids a few heartbeats ago.