Bob the Self-Esteem Chicken says, "Low self esteem is for losers!"
Least Attractive Personality Traits
1. Bigotry (Seriously, you're an idiot and you need to get away from me...and everyone else.)
2. Know-it-all-ism (Yes, yes. You're brilliant. So am I. Let's move on.)
3. Low self esteem
That last one is tough for me. I definitely had a bad self image when I was young. I grew up at the uglier/dorkier/sicklier/less fun sister, and it took a while to get past that. Mostly, I did it by faking self confidence until I started to believe it. (Not kidding, it totally worked for me!) Nowadays I mostly think I'm awesome. I'm smart, creative, funny, and damn sexy. I worked for that, and I still work on it everyday.
I have acquaintances and coworkers who feel like it's okay to trash themselves, and it makes me angry. Like genuinely angry. I've realized that my reactions are about me and my old issues, and I try to keep that anger to myself. Sometimes, I just can't.
There is a woman I work with who is almost constantly putting herself down. We're friendly, gone to movies and concerts together, had dinner a few times. I've talked to her about her self-deprecation, and told her that it bothers me. She doesn't get why, and she may never. At the office, we instituted a "Chicken Jar", just for her. If she says something bad about herself, she has to put a quarter in the jar. It works to a point.
But I don't want to be around her anymore, and I've realized that that's why. I make excuses and don't tell her about stuff that she might to come along for. I feel shitty for leaving her out, but not enough to include her. Sometimes I actually have to close my eyes and count to ten to keep from saying something I can't take back. It seems like only a matter of time before that doesn't work either.
/rant, with apologies.
1. Bigotry (Seriously, you're an idiot and you need to get away from me...and everyone else.)
2. Know-it-all-ism (Yes, yes. You're brilliant. So am I. Let's move on.)
3. Low self esteem
That last one is tough for me. I definitely had a bad self image when I was young. I grew up at the uglier/dorkier/sicklier/less fun sister, and it took a while to get past that. Mostly, I did it by faking self confidence until I started to believe it. (Not kidding, it totally worked for me!) Nowadays I mostly think I'm awesome. I'm smart, creative, funny, and damn sexy. I worked for that, and I still work on it everyday.
I have acquaintances and coworkers who feel like it's okay to trash themselves, and it makes me angry. Like genuinely angry. I've realized that my reactions are about me and my old issues, and I try to keep that anger to myself. Sometimes, I just can't.
There is a woman I work with who is almost constantly putting herself down. We're friendly, gone to movies and concerts together, had dinner a few times. I've talked to her about her self-deprecation, and told her that it bothers me. She doesn't get why, and she may never. At the office, we instituted a "Chicken Jar", just for her. If she says something bad about herself, she has to put a quarter in the jar. It works to a point.
But I don't want to be around her anymore, and I've realized that that's why. I make excuses and don't tell her about stuff that she might to come along for. I feel shitty for leaving her out, but not enough to include her. Sometimes I actually have to close my eyes and count to ten to keep from saying something I can't take back. It seems like only a matter of time before that doesn't work either.
/rant, with apologies.