(no subject)
I used to use this as an outlet for when I couldn't talk to him. No suprise, then, that our relationship ended. I wasn't with him or any other when I lost my journal. I was actually at a pretty good place in my life and seldom around computers, so I didn't notice or mind all that much except for the fact that I'd lost my previous entries, the personal written documents to my life for those years. One gets use to losing journals and, except for those few exceptional entries, you seldom read them again anyhow. How sad would that be? Not that I haven't done it, but finding yourself sitting on the floor of your room for hours rereading your (often horrible) life experiences... really? (said in just the way Kate says it - in a that-doesn't-happen or shouldn't-happen sort of way). A person is often most harsh on aspects of others that they themselves have. Although, am I really being harsh?
I wish I were boarding right now - out there -flying on land. Feeling life swell up inside of me as I twist my body to manipulate my board over the snow, every now and again worrying about my back, hoping I won't be in pain later, sometimes lying in the snow hoping the cold will get through my clothes and bring down the inflamation in my SI joint and my sacrum. With this new chiropractor I'm seeing I'm convinced everyone has problems with that part of their back and they know just what I'm talking about. Of course it's only the people that go there that have the same types of pains...
My thought process is leaving me. An aspect you'd have found occurred quite often in my old entries. I guess it's going to appear in the new as well. Such is.
Is this mine only now? This journal? - something I have separate from the wonderful person now in my life? What we have apart and what we have together is a very confusing question that has caused me great consternation as of late, but that's for us to talk about. I want to make this one work.
I wish I were boarding right now - out there -flying on land. Feeling life swell up inside of me as I twist my body to manipulate my board over the snow, every now and again worrying about my back, hoping I won't be in pain later, sometimes lying in the snow hoping the cold will get through my clothes and bring down the inflamation in my SI joint and my sacrum. With this new chiropractor I'm seeing I'm convinced everyone has problems with that part of their back and they know just what I'm talking about. Of course it's only the people that go there that have the same types of pains...
My thought process is leaving me. An aspect you'd have found occurred quite often in my old entries. I guess it's going to appear in the new as well. Such is.
Is this mine only now? This journal? - something I have separate from the wonderful person now in my life? What we have apart and what we have together is a very confusing question that has caused me great consternation as of late, but that's for us to talk about. I want to make this one work.