"Curse words"
Lately I've been having conversations with various friends about which words and terms that are not "four-letter-words" were still forbidden in our homes growing up. A couple of people have told me "shut up" was/is on this list of things you just don't say. It was never directly expressed that that is off limits for my family, but it really wasn't something that I recall being used. ("Be quiet" or even "shut your mouth," but not "shut up") Someone else has said their mother didn't allow them to use the word "lie".
I know I've spoken before with Roli about how for my future children I'll be much harder on them about using stigmatizing/oppressive terms than four-letter-words. For example, I'll care a lot more about my child saying bitch, the n-word, f*g or retard than I would about him/her saying fuck, shit or damn. The latter I will likely just inform them should not be used in certain settings. I doubt I'll forbid them altogether in the home
But beyond that I personally consider any insults of intelligence to be... perhaps not "curses" but they are certainly among the highest level of offense one can give. I know I joke a lot. And there's plenty of room for sarcasm and poking fun, but you will not see me using the terms idiot, jackass, stupid, etc unless either 1. I view the person strictly as an adversary or in a strictly/generally adversarial/non-friend context or 2. if you are a friend, you've done something tremendously harmful and offensive. And even then I'm also clear to make the distinction of calling the behavior unintelligent and not the person.
I really do not think using those terms (nor in any way insulting someone's intelligence) are language to be played around with nor something to say/use casually. THAT was most certainly something that did not go down in my family. Like at all. So much so that there was no need for my gramma, mother and sister to tell me not to use it. We just didn't even think to say that kind of stuff. I dig that other people have that in their vocabulary and can use it playfully, but for me that language is abusive.
Also, the part of me that appreciates humor feels intelligence/weight/"ugly" and other rote jokes are fuckin tired, corny and over done. ("Women be shoppin") Just try fuckin harder and be more creative.
It wasn't until I started having these conversations that I realized how strongly I feel about this and how offensive I find that language and those kinds of "jokes."
ETA: I can't believe I forgot penis and vagina!! I was only allowed to use euphemisms for my genitals. And could not speak of male genitals at all. Saddest shit in the world. lol
So, do y'all have any words and terms that while not being considered curses in the sense we know were still off limits in your homes growing up?
I know I've spoken before with Roli about how for my future children I'll be much harder on them about using stigmatizing/oppressive terms than four-letter-words. For example, I'll care a lot more about my child saying bitch, the n-word, f*g or retard than I would about him/her saying fuck, shit or damn. The latter I will likely just inform them should not be used in certain settings. I doubt I'll forbid them altogether in the home
But beyond that I personally consider any insults of intelligence to be... perhaps not "curses" but they are certainly among the highest level of offense one can give. I know I joke a lot. And there's plenty of room for sarcasm and poking fun, but you will not see me using the terms idiot, jackass, stupid, etc unless either 1. I view the person strictly as an adversary or in a strictly/generally adversarial/non-friend context or 2. if you are a friend, you've done something tremendously harmful and offensive. And even then I'm also clear to make the distinction of calling the behavior unintelligent and not the person.
I really do not think using those terms (nor in any way insulting someone's intelligence) are language to be played around with nor something to say/use casually. THAT was most certainly something that did not go down in my family. Like at all. So much so that there was no need for my gramma, mother and sister to tell me not to use it. We just didn't even think to say that kind of stuff. I dig that other people have that in their vocabulary and can use it playfully, but for me that language is abusive.
Also, the part of me that appreciates humor feels intelligence/weight/"ugly" and other rote jokes are fuckin tired, corny and over done. ("Women be shoppin") Just try fuckin harder and be more creative.
It wasn't until I started having these conversations that I realized how strongly I feel about this and how offensive I find that language and those kinds of "jokes."
ETA: I can't believe I forgot penis and vagina!! I was only allowed to use euphemisms for my genitals. And could not speak of male genitals at all. Saddest shit in the world. lol
So, do y'all have any words and terms that while not being considered curses in the sense we know were still off limits in your homes growing up?