Before & After
Blatantly stolen from here
Poll Post Coitus
So here's another question (not stolen). TV often depicts people that seem frustrated with partners that ask them for directions in the bedroom. So I'm wondering if this is a reflection of how people really view those kinds of questions or if it's just a reflection of the people that tend to become TV writers. So...does a (potential) partner asking you to describe what you want bother/frustrate you? Does it matter if it's before or during sex?
I just don't see what other way do people expect their partners to know how to pleasure them. Fuckin telepathy? Do people really expect their partners to somehow intuitively know exactly what they like (and in total)? To me someone asking you want you want is only frustrating for two reasons (1) if you are too immature to have an open, frank conversation about sex or (2) if you have no clue what you like. In either case the frustration is really coming from within and the person asking questions is just an object for you to place that frustration on. I can actually recall early on when I started having sex being "annoyed" when a guy asked me to tell him what do to and if it felt good. And it was really only "annoying" because I didn't know how to say he was doing it wrong, which was partially because at the time I had no clue what doing it "right" looked like for me. Now I'm damn near ready to jump out of my seat and start drawing diagrams when the conversations emerge. Like it just makes sense and seems natural (and mature!). So it's odd and stupid to me when I see it showed how it gets shown on TV and in the movies.
I will say there was also some fear I associated with talking about sex because it was such a taboo topic for me growing up. And I worried that if I said "the wrong thing" I'd be revealed as inexperienced and/or the guy would reject me. This is also why I faked it for so long.
For me it's only annoying if a guy says "do you like that" in that "hahaaaa!!! I know I'm killin it!" way. Where it's not even really a question. It's more of a declaration and his way of trynna get me to boost his clearly already inflated ego. Oh, and if I am describing my experience and it's being denied. Like "you can't tell me you're not horny!! I see your nipples are hard!!" =/ And mistaking my natural moisture for arousal wetness. I really feel like blowing up someone's spot and I know he reads my LJ, but I'ma be nice. 0=-)
Also 9 times out of 10 these are the same people pissed off because their partners aren't doing something the way they like. Well, open your goddamn mouth then!
Poll Post Coitus
So here's another question (not stolen). TV often depicts people that seem frustrated with partners that ask them for directions in the bedroom. So I'm wondering if this is a reflection of how people really view those kinds of questions or if it's just a reflection of the people that tend to become TV writers. So...does a (potential) partner asking you to describe what you want bother/frustrate you? Does it matter if it's before or during sex?
I just don't see what other way do people expect their partners to know how to pleasure them. Fuckin telepathy? Do people really expect their partners to somehow intuitively know exactly what they like (and in total)? To me someone asking you want you want is only frustrating for two reasons (1) if you are too immature to have an open, frank conversation about sex or (2) if you have no clue what you like. In either case the frustration is really coming from within and the person asking questions is just an object for you to place that frustration on. I can actually recall early on when I started having sex being "annoyed" when a guy asked me to tell him what do to and if it felt good. And it was really only "annoying" because I didn't know how to say he was doing it wrong, which was partially because at the time I had no clue what doing it "right" looked like for me. Now I'm damn near ready to jump out of my seat and start drawing diagrams when the conversations emerge. Like it just makes sense and seems natural (and mature!). So it's odd and stupid to me when I see it showed how it gets shown on TV and in the movies.
I will say there was also some fear I associated with talking about sex because it was such a taboo topic for me growing up. And I worried that if I said "the wrong thing" I'd be revealed as inexperienced and/or the guy would reject me. This is also why I faked it for so long.
For me it's only annoying if a guy says "do you like that" in that "hahaaaa!!! I know I'm killin it!" way. Where it's not even really a question. It's more of a declaration and his way of trynna get me to boost his clearly already inflated ego. Oh, and if I am describing my experience and it's being denied. Like "you can't tell me you're not horny!! I see your nipples are hard!!" =/ And mistaking my natural moisture for arousal wetness. I really feel like blowing up someone's spot and I know he reads my LJ, but I'ma be nice. 0=-)
Also 9 times out of 10 these are the same people pissed off because their partners aren't doing something the way they like. Well, open your goddamn mouth then!