(no subject)
In this moment, I would give anything to feel the winds of the Pacific Northwest on my face. To feel the sea spray coming up from the bow of a ship as it slices through the waters of the San Juans. To trail my hand through the ocean and watch the luminescent microbes light up under my touch.
I want to watch the sun dip under the horizon, blazing liquid fire and the waters' surface. Otters playing around our boat with walruses lazing on jutting rocks. To spend ours rowing, dipping oar and pulling. A repeating motion in tandem with crew and Skipper. A quarter mile tide means clams and mussels.
I have never had a tragic love.
My last great seduction came too soon but was well spent.
Sex and love are only connected in theory. In practice, they can't coexist in my same moment.
I sometimes see myself as a guardian of my friends.
I want to martyr myself on the altar of friendship so that my sins can be erased, so that they can say that despite being a terrible person, I was good at heart.
I want to die heroically, for a good reason, a good cause.
I want my life to matter.
I want to watch the sun dip under the horizon, blazing liquid fire and the waters' surface. Otters playing around our boat with walruses lazing on jutting rocks. To spend ours rowing, dipping oar and pulling. A repeating motion in tandem with crew and Skipper. A quarter mile tide means clams and mussels.
I have never had a tragic love.
My last great seduction came too soon but was well spent.
Sex and love are only connected in theory. In practice, they can't coexist in my same moment.
I sometimes see myself as a guardian of my friends.
I want to martyr myself on the altar of friendship so that my sins can be erased, so that they can say that despite being a terrible person, I was good at heart.
I want to die heroically, for a good reason, a good cause.
I want my life to matter.